


My Home is Your Body

by crystalkei



Series: Never Have I Ever Actually Fallen In Love [17]
Category: Never Have I Ever (TV)
Genre: Exes, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Future Fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2021-02-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:15:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 57,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26071753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crystalkei/pseuds/crystalkei
Summary: It's been nine years since Devi and Paxton have seen each other. It's been 12 years since they broke up after Devi graduated and went to Princeton. But now Devi is home and Paxton is all in. But Devi might not be.
Relationships: Paxton Hall-Yoshida/Devi Vishwakumar, Trent Harrison/Eleanor Wong
Series: Never Have I Ever Actually Fallen In Love [17]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1761826
Comments: 101
Kudos: 128





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic takes place in the same universe as the high school fic. :) Enjoy!

Friday night at the ER wasn’t what Paxton had planned but the actual plan was more boring and involved HGTV and reheated takeout from Thursday night so Devi Vishwakumar pulling back the curtain of his little stall in the ER was a total improvement. 

“Heard a rumor it was you back here,” she said, flirty. She’d gotten better at flirting over the years.    
  
“And I had literally no idea you would be here,” Paxton said, trying to sound cool and not like his heart rate had gone up at just the sight of her. “You’re home?”

“Yeah.” She pulled on some latex gloves and tipped his head back with a hand on his chin, she tsked. “Not your money maker, how’d you do this?”

He smiled. Better at flirting, but still the same lines. 

“My mom has been bugging me to put a couple shelves in her bathroom, one of the anchors didn’t hold and the shelf decided to fight back.”    
  
This time Devi smiled. She was so close, examining the cut above his eyebrow, she still smelled the same. Had it been five years since he’d run into her? No, definitely longer. Since the wedding? So nine years.

“What made you finally come home?” he asked. She wasn’t supposed to be gone forever but it felt like she had been. 

She stepped back, pulled the gloves off in that cool way that doctors on TV do, and chucked them in a bin next to the bed. “You’re gonna need three stitches. Could be done in one, but the interns need the practice.” 

“Whoa,” Paxton said, shaking his head. “How about you do it and we call it good?”

Devi looked over her shoulder and Paxton saw a group of what he supposed were interns, they looked desperate to stitch him and he didn’t love that.    
  
“What’s in it for me?” There was a glint in her eye and Paxton had to pretend again that he was cool and collected and not ready to convince her to fuck him right there in the ER. 

“We get to catch up,” he said. It wasn’t a strong argument but she bit her lip and he knew that meant she was considering it so it would do. 

“We’re gonna do that anyway.” She crossed her arms. 

“What? While that 25 year old intern has a needle in my face?” He pointed his chin at the group of interns behind her. “Which intern wants to hear about my unlikely career choice?”

Several interns, most of them women, and at least one man, raised their hands. 

Devi huffed and pulled the curtain closed around them. “Go find Dr. Reynolds!” she shouted through the curtain at them before digging into a cart next to the bed. 

“I’m gonna bill you for this,” she joked, pulling out the supplies she needed. 

“My insurance is pretty good but I don’t make a lot of money so I need the friends and family discount.” He winked at her and she shook her head, but she was holding back a smile.    
  
“So, what’s the unlikely career choice?” She pulled over a stool and sat down.    
  
“I’m a coach.”    
  
“That’s not unlikely or shocking,” she said, moving to pull up her now shoulder length hair into a ponytail. 

“That’s the side gig actually,” he said, drawing it out. “I’m a teacher.”    
  
“Right, because you’re a coach.” She went back to ordering her tools. 

“I teach second grade.” 

She turned, shocked. “Excuse me?”

“I tried kindergarten but they’re so snotty and they can’t tie their shoes.”    
  
“Second graders, you’re teaching kids to fuckin’ read?” 

“Actually, they start learning to read in kinder, by second grade they’re usually proficient except for a few cases.” He tried to raise his eyebrow but he was reminded by the sharp pain that there was a pretty gnarly gash stopping him from giving it his full flirt. “And reading help is actually my specialty. I’m thinking about a master’s program next year in early reading.” 

She had a proficiency kink and maybe he was showing off, exploiting that, but it was Devi and she was back and he was overeager and maybe he’d been thinking about telling her about this for a while. He remembered the day he figured out what he wanted to do and how he’d wanted to text her to tell her. It was a breakthrough and he wanted to share it but they’d been broken up too long by then, he wasn’t even sure the number he had was still hers.   
  
“You teach second grade? You hated school.” 

“Yeah, that started in elementary school. So why not make myself the best teacher for those kids who hate school? Besides, kids of color do better when they have a teacher who looks like them, boys do better when they have male influences outside of just their parents, and who better to teach them early about consent and how to treat other people?”

Devi tilted her head, that wasn’t usually the response he got there. “Is this just a spiel you give? Does this work?”

He frowned, that stung. “No, I like my job.” 

“Oh,” she said, embarrassed. “Sorry.” 

Devi looked away and filled a small syringe. She turned back to him and put some dressing around his cut, partially obscuring his vision. That was probably better. He closed his eyes but something had him opening them again, he couldn’t help but look at her, even at less than flattering angles. Her concentration face was the same as it always was and there was a weird feeling of nostalgia and longing pulsing through him seeing her make that face, her lip between her teeth and her eyes determined.

“So just one stitch or are there gonna be three?” 

“Just a little pinch,” she said, giving him the local numbing agent. “It’s gonna be one. I can do it in one. And it won’t scar. Didn’t Trent superglue his face back together once?”

“No, I glued his face back together,” Paxton corrected her. “But it was his idea.” 

“You still hang out with Trent?” she asked as she worked. 

“You don’t know?”    
  
Yes, he still hung out with Trent. And Devi still texted Eleanor regularly. Why the formality of asking?

“I’m making polite conversation,” she said, mildly irritated. 

“Why? It’s just me.”   
  
“I haven’t seen you in almost 10 years, I’m being polite!” she snapped but followed it with a tight smile. 

He reached out and touched her elbow, softly. He missed touching her. “Sorry. I’m not gonna aggravate someone who has a needle in my forehead.” 

“Is your hairline receding?” It was a joke but he gasped and moved his hand to his hairline. It was probably too forward to touch her anyway.. She ran a finger down his hairline on the other side, decidedly away from the cut on his head. She brushed his hand as she went and he tried not to shiver at it.    
  
“Don’t tease, I’m very sensitive about that.” 

“See, I know how to act just fine,” Devi said, a laugh in her voice. 

“Do they know you’re here?” he asked but he had an inkling what her answer would be.    
  
Devi hesitated. “Yeah, I told Eleanor and Trent not to tell you.” 

"Why?” He tried not to sound hurt but his hopes were about to be dashed and it was probably better that he knew now.    
  
“I wasn’t ready to run into you yet.”    
  
“And what? You think I would have shown up at your mom’s house?”

“That’s not exactly out of character for you,” she said, pointedly. 

He shrugged. She had a point. He couldn’t see her whole face, she was off to the side, but he could feel her hand on his head so she was still working.    
  
“I wanted to get a little more settled. I’ve only been back a week. This is my third day at work for fuck’s sake.” 

“Okay never mind, I just thought-”   
  
But she cut him off. “You just thought that nine years ago at Trent and Eleanor’s wedding when we said we’d revisit that we were both going to actually do that?” 

“Hey,” he started. 

“No, wait,” she cut him off again. “I’m sorry. I do want to revisit but I just wasn’t ready yet. I wanted to, I don’t know, work out or something. Get my lip waxed, get a haircut, I wanted to be cute. I didn’t know you’d show up here and I haven’t slept in three days because the mattress in my childhood bedroom is shit and my mom has been driving me crazy and I just wanted to prepare that’s all.” 

“Well maybe if you’d at least let Trent mention it I would have gone to the urgent care on Orchard Street instead of the hospital that you’re now employed at,” he calmly explained, a half smile on his face. 

Yes, nine years ago at Trent and Eleanor’s wedding things started rocky with the two of them but by the end of the weekend it seemed like they were better. They still had all those heady feelings of infatuation and love and he wanted her. He always wanted her. What dumbass high school kid boy dreams of marrying his high school girlfriend? He did. 

“Sorry, everything was sort of a whirlwind, me coming home, so I may have made some mistakes.” She moved just out of his line of obstructed sight and he hated that he couldn’t see her now.

“Why was it a whirlwind?” He’d already asked what brought her home but she’d ignored or dodged or maybe was just really concerned about his headwound and missed it but he wasn’t gonna miss this opportunity to ask again. 

Devi sighed and he wondered if she might not answer. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked.

“Three months ago my mom found a lump in her breast,” Devi said, coming back into his view, but all he could see was a strand of her hair coming out of her ponytail, resting on the side of her cheek. 

“Shit.” He hadn’t heard about that.

“She’s fine!” Devi added, quickly. “It was benign. But I spent a few days out here when she got the results and had it removed and I went back to Boston and I went to work and made it all of two hours of a shift before I quit my job and packed up my apartment.” 

“That sounds hectic.” He didn’t know what to say but he regretted saying that. It felt empty.    
  
Devi took a step back to admire her handiwork on his head, it looked like her eyes were watering. Years later, he still knew what she looked like when she was trying not to cry. “I was gone too long. I had to come home. It felt...wrong when I went back to Boston. Even if my mom is fine.” 

Paxton wished he hadn’t used up his one appropriate touch on her elbow earlier because he really wanted to touch her now. That used to help her, ground her a little when she was emotional. His hand twitched and he balled it into a fist and put it off to the side so she wouldn’t see. 

“Anyways, I didn’t even tell my mom. Classic Devi.” She shook her head like she was embarrassed. “So I drove across the country with whatever fit in my car and now I’m here. I wasn’t supposed to start work until next week but she was driving me crazy. She’s still recovering from the surgery to remove the tissue but she’s not, like, helpless. So it was just her bossing me around and I begged them to let me start early so I could get some peace. And then you showed up.” She smiled and he couldn’t help but smile back. 

“So what you’re saying is you need to go mattress shopping,” he said. 

Devi laughed, and moved closer to him, removing the dressing from his forehead. “Yeah, the mattress in my room is shit.” 

“I seem to remember it being just fine but it’s been a lot of years.” 

She rolled her eyes. “The stitch will dissolve, you don’t have to come back to have it removed. And it shouldn’t scar. I’m really fuckin’ good at stitches.” 

“Thanks for doing it instead of one of the kids.” He swung his legs around getting ready to get off the bed but she hadn’t moved, so he ended up looking up at her, she was right there. If he’d shifted just barely he could kiss her. 

She gasped, but she tried to hide it by clearing her throat. He considered leaning back, giving her space. But she hadn’t moved at all, and she could, she could have stepped back. They sat there, uncomfortably close, staring at each other for three seconds before a nurse pulled back the curtain.    
  
“Sorry, thought this bed was clear,” said the nurse. But the spell was broken now. Devi took a step back and Paxton looked down. 

“Do you still have my number?” she asked, surprising him. 

“Ends in 9712?” Yes, he still knew her number by heart. Embarrassing. 

“Yeah, your’s still the same?” When he nodded she kept talking, “I’ll text you. We can go to Ikea and mattress shop. I need a bookshelf, too and I don’t want to build it so…” 

“I’m your guy,” he said, trying not to sound too excited. He started to go but waited. “You don’t need a haircut or a lip wax or to work out. You look great. I’m glad,” he stopped. He wanted to say he was glad to see her. “I’m glad you’re home.” 

She smiled, but she stopped, not that full, bright one she used to give him when he complimented her, she stopped and reigned it in. It was probably something she’d just learned to reel in from adulthood. You learn that not everybody wants those smiles, you give too much away with them. But he wished he’d gotten the full smile. That one that lit up her whole face and showed all her teeth and made him feel like he was the only person in the universe that mattered. Close enough though. Maybe once they were back on track she’d give him those. 

\--

  
  


Paxton knocked on the door and then opened it, as was his usual routine. “I know it’s past bedtime for kids so this is me shouting to alert you of my presence and make sure everyone is decent!” 

“You know you could just knock,” Eleanor said, walking to the front door and dropping three pairs of tiny shoes. 

“I heard him knock,” Trent said, calling from the living room. “Dude, what happened to your head?”

Paxton came in and sat down on the loveseat while Trent wound the cord of the vacuum up. 

“Oh this?” He gestured to his head. “I needed a couple of stitches, a shelf did not want to be hung in my mom’s bathroom so instead it hit me.” Paxton paused and waited for Eleanor to make her way back to the room. 

“How do kids who aren’t even three feet tall make a mess that takes the full hour after bedtime to clean up?” she said as she flopped onto the couch. 

“No idea,” Paxton said, then pointed at his bandaged head wound. “Back to me though, I had to go to the ER.” 

“That sucks,” Trent said.

“Oh shit,” Eleanor added as Trent sat down next to her, she smacked his arm. 

“Ohhhhhh.” 

“Yeah, guys, yeah, guess who I saw there?”

“Your mom?” Trent deadpanned.    
  
“I don’t know why you don’t let him write more screenplays of yours, Eleanor, he’s a comic genius.” 

“I’m getting a sense that you’re annoyed, Paxton Hall-Yoshida, and I don’t know that I deserve that kind of energy directed at me,” she said, putting on her mom voice. 

“You could have warned me the love of my life was home!” he said, raising his voice enough to make a point but not enough to wake the toddlers. 

“God, that’s dramatic, tell me you didn’t say that to her.” Eleanor rolled her eyes. 

“Hey, I’m the love of your life,” Trent said.    
  
“Platonically, Trent, but you’re married so…” Paxton gestured to Eleanor. “And no, I didn’t say that to her. I’m well versed in how to act around women, Eleanor.”    
  
“But not Devi. You’re a mess when it comes to Devi.” Eleanor shook her head and Trent turned to her, ignoring Paxton. 

“She’s pretty much a mess when it comes to him too,” Trent added. “They almost ruined our wedding.” 

Eleanor pat Trent’s cheek. “I know, babe, I remember.” 

“Where’s my sympathy?” Paxton asked, annoyed. “Head injury and running into my ex girlfriend!” 

Trent turned back to him and sighed. “Well, how’d it go?”

“Fine? I think? We might go mattress shopping. I offered to build a shelf for her.”    
  
“Sounds like it went great, why are you mad at us?” Trent asked. 

“You should have told me! I was caught off guard!” Paxton said. “It’s whatever. I did fine. No thanks to you. But I think it’s time, you know?”

“No,” Eleanor said, sitting up straight and shaking her head. “No, no, no. You need to slow your roll.” 

“Excuse me?” Paxton asked, confused.

“You can’t come onto her like she’s home and now your longsuffering wait is over.” Eleanor nudged Trent and he sat up too.    
  
“Right,” he said to her, then turned to Paxton. “You gotta listen to her.”    
  
“What are you guys trying to say?” Paxton’s brows furrowed and he found himself mirroring their position, sitting up from the loveseat straighter. 

Eleanor put her hands in a praying position and rested her lips against her fingers. “You want to jump right back in and date Devi and then ask her to marry you and then live happily ever after. You’re still in love with her.” 

“We only broke up after high school because she left! I was always gonna be in love with Devi, I’m fine admitting that,” Paxton said, feeling less concerned about whatever Eleanor was trying to say. He was fine admitting that. Devi was  _ the one _ for him and he wasn’t shy about it. 

“I know, honey, we all know that, but one person doesn’t know that.” Eleanor sighed. Paxton stared at her blankly. “Devi doesn’t know that.” 

Paxton laughed. “No seriously.” 

Eleanor looked at Trent and Trent looked down and nodded.    
  
“I’m gonna get you a beer,” Trent said, standing up. “You want a glass of wine, E?” 

“Yes please, this is gonna take some time,” she said, pinching the bridge of her nose, and turning back to Paxton. “See, you have spent the last nine years just dating for fun. You date somebody like what, six weeks? Maybe eight if you like them and they don’t require a lot of maintenance? And then you break up.”    
  
“That’s not true.” Paxton thought for a second and oh. Okay, she might have a point. But that’s fine. He was just dating. There was nothing wrong with dating!   
  
“Honey,” Eleanor said to him, pity in her eyes, taking the glass of wine Trent gave her. “You’ve been waiting for Devi to come home.” 

“I never said that I wasn’t. We’ve already established that.” Paxton narrowed his eyes at Eleanor and took the beer bottle Trent gave him. “And stop calling me honey.” 

Trent sat down and raised his beer. “She’s got a southern belle thing this week, it’s just gonna keep happening. You’ll get used to it.” 

Eleanor was a character actress. A good one. She’d been nominated for five Best Supporting in a Guest Role Emmys and Eleanor was very happy with that niche she’d carved out. She was in acting for the craft, not the fame, though she had a reasonable amount of fame, too. Paxton had gone to Target with her last month and she was stopped twice by people asking for selfies. 

“The thing is...you know what, you should take a drink,” she said, lifting her own glass. Paxton took a pull from his beer to appease her and get her to keep talking. “Devi hasn’t been waiting to come home and hasn’t been waiting for you.” 

Paxton coughed. Beer had gone down the wrong tube. It wasn’t what Eleanor had said. It was the beer. Down the wrong tube. He coughed again. 

“Yeah, he didn’t know that,” Trent said, turning to Eleanor.    
  
“I just,” he coughed again. “Just choked on the beer. I’m fine. Of course, why would she?” He couldn’t stop coughing and Trent stood up and smacked his back a few times. 

“It’s alright, man, I know. It’s hard to hear.” 

It was fine. This was fine. A lot more of their interaction at the hospital made sense now. Oh god, how badly had he embarrassed himself with all those references to before? How much did he look like a lost, pathetic puppy, thrilled to find her home when she didn’t even care about him? 

“It’s fine,” he managed to get out, still trying to catch his breath from choking. “It’s been years, why would she?” Paxton shrugged, pursing his lips and trying not to visibly panic on his best friend’s couch. “Who wouldn’t move on? Right? We broke up after high school. Not for any reason other than she was leaving and it seemed like the mature thing to do. She needed to focus on school and I knew there was always a shelf life so you know, we broke up. She texted me pretty regularly that whole first year away until she got tired of me, but yeah we broke up so…”    
  
She hadn’t gotten tired of him, exactly, but Paxton felt sure that all these years later, Devi had never spoken of what really halted their communication and he hadn’t told anybody so years later didn’t seem like a good time to let Trent and Eleanor in on that event. 

Eleanor looked at him sympathetically. “You broke up after high school and then there was the wedding that you two almost ruined with all your messy feelings, thanks a lot for that.”    
  
“We didn’t actually ruin the wedding, stop saying it like that,” Paxton defended. “The actual wedding was fine.” 

Trent made a face, and a high pitched sound. “If you have to be that specific maybe you ruined enough of the wedding events to allow for E and I to keep bringing it up almost ten years later.” 

Paxton frowned. 

“Whatever, the thing is, I know you guys made some pact after the wedding that you’d wait until she came home and you’d get back together.” 

“I wouldn’t call it a pact,” Paxton quickly corrected Eleanor. 

“I wasn’t privy to the inner workings of that. I was trying to salvage my honeymoon.”  Eleanor looked at Trent and he leaned over and kissed her quickly. 

“The honeymoon was good, babe,” Trent said. 

“We didn’t ruin the wedding!” Paxton repeated for what seemed like the hundredth time. 

Eleanor sighed again. “Devi has dated people, Paxton. Seriously. She almost got married three years ago.”

“Like how close to getting married? Like she told you on the phone that hypothetically she could see herself marrying someone or were there invitations printed? Did they book a venue?” Paxton was just reeling now. He had no idea what he was saying.    
  
Trent shook his head. “Dude, the answer to that question won’t make you feel better.” 

“Even if she hadn’t dated people seriously, you can’t just go into this like you’re going to pick up where you left off, Paxton.” Eleanor looked at Trent and then back to Paxton. It felt like he wasn’t getting the whole story from them. 

“It’s been years. It’s not like I was just gonna jump right into us dating again!” 

“Weren’t you though?” Trent asked. “You’ve been waiting for her to get home and now she’s home and the first thing you did after finding out was to come over here to yell at us.”

“I thought we’d all just hang out. Together,” Paxton offered. “We can hang out first. See, not a date.”    
  
“Oh no, we can’t all hang out together,” Trent said.    
  
“That looks like a double date. We can’t do that,” Eleanor added while Trent nodded in agreement. 

Before Paxton could say anything else, a small voice shouted from the stairs.    
  
“I’ll go,” Trent said, but Eleanor put her hand on his knee.

“I got it. You keep trying to talk sense into your best friend.” 

Paxton leaned over so he could see the kid on the stairs. It was Emma. Her hair was in braids and her nightgown was frilly and pink. He waved and she waved back just as Eleanor got to her and took her upstairs. 

“How’d she look though?” Trent said, shifting gears since Eleanor was gone. 

Paxton thought back. Devi’s hair was shorter, but still wavy, and despite her claim that she hadn’t slept well in days, her skin looked amazing. Like she was glowing. She was wearing a skirt and her legs still got him. He loved her legs.    
  
Trent cleared his throat and Paxton shook his head. “She looked good.” 

“The doctor’s coat really helps. Was it the coat? I’ve got every episode that Eleanor plays a doctor on the cloud. Really helps when she’s gone.”    
  
“Ew, man,” Paxton said, making a face. ”And you have every episode of everything Eleanor has done on the cloud.” 

“Yeah, I do, both for personal reasons and the podcast.” 

Trent produced a weekly podcast called  _ Tuesdays with Trent _ . It came out on Thursdays (just to fuck with people) and it was basically Trent talking about whatever he wanted. It was his creative outlet to balance his other job, stay at home dad. (He loved being a stay at home dad and as of recently was in his feelings over the fact that their oldest kid, Teddy, was nearing kindergarten age.) The podcast had gotten so popular it wasn’t unusual for him to score big guests like the time he ran into Harrison Ford at Trader Joe’s and convinced him to be on the podcast. The first of every month there was a bonus episode where Trent discussed a project, play, episode, or film that Eleanor had done. It was a rolling love letter to her work and Paxton found it absolutely impossible to listen to. He was happy for his friends but he also had to look them in the eyes and the sappy shit that came out of that portion of the podcast was too much for him to handle. 

“Eleanor is right though, dude, you can’t just go full speed at Devi. You’re gonna have to make her fall in love with you again.” Trent shifted on the couch and then reached behind him, pulling out a barbie doll dressed like a firefighter and chucking it across the room into the toy box. “By the way, I need you to come over tomorrow and help me build a trampoline.”

“Somebody’s gonna break their arm on a trampoline,” Paxton said, cautiously taking another sip of the beer that had previously betrayed him. 

“ _ You _ broke your arm on the trampoline. My kids aren’t idiots so they’ll be fine,” Trent said and Paxton gave him the finger for good measure.. “Plus this one’s got a net. It’s for Emma’s birthday.” 

“Wasn’t Emma’s birthday last month? Didn’t I buy her the loudest toy at the store?” Paxton asked. 

“She’s three. She doesn’t know what time means. And I took the batteries out of that toy, that stuffed dog, it was so loud. I’ve done nothing to you and you bring that shit into my house,” Trent lamented. 

Paxton stood up, heading for the toy box in the corner. “I’m putting the batteries back in.” 

Trent stood up now and blocked his way. “Don’t you dare,” he said, while they pushed back and forth. 

“The stuffed dog without batteries is in Emma’s bed,” Eleanor said, coming down the stairs. “I believe she named it Ruff.” 

Paxton and Trent stopped and Paxton adjusted his shirt, pulling it down, and Trent smoothed his hair. 

“I’m gonna go,” Paxton said. “Thanks for the beer and the...what’s the opposite of a pep talk?”

“Come to Jesus meeting?” Trent offered and Eleanor shook her head. 

“Reality check.”   
  
“You both suck, what time should I be here to build the trampoline?” 

“You’re not mowing lawns tomorrow, are you?” Trent asked, sitting down with Eleanor on the couch. She turned on the TV and was already cruising Netflix. 

“Nah. I can show up at 10? I’ll bring donuts.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paxton and Devi go to Ikea to buy her a new mattress. There is a con involved. For old time's sake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One thing I wanted to mention! Eleanor and Trent have two kids. I know I didn't explicitly state that in the last fic but a lot of people took a line to mean they had three but they only have two!

Paxton looked hot. Again. As usual? It was a crime and a personal attack against Devi. She hadn’t slept well in weeks between her mom’s health and the ridiculously impulsive move and now the shitty old mattress on her bed that she was currently lying on, staring at the ceiling. How many nights had she looked up at this ceiling thinking about Paxton Hall-Yoshida. Goddammit. This was humiliating. 

She was an adult. A professional. A doctor, nay a resident! And yet he really just showed up in her place of business looking like that. All tan, he probably still spent all summer swimming, looking like he’d shaved the day before so he had just the perfect amount of scruff, and ugh. His hair. It wasn’t any longer than high school but now he didn’t gel it down and it was just fluffy curls that begged to be pushed off his forehead. Yeah. Humiliating. 

And he wanted her? That’s what it certainly felt like. Paxton hadn’t turned off the flirting at all. Start to finish, he seemed interested. She almost jumped out of her skin when he touched her elbow. How embarrassing. Thank god she thought quick enough to make a joke because he would have noticed otherwise. And she almost cried! Telling him about her mom’s cancer scare, she felt the tears trying to come. That was the last thing she wanted him to see! He always saw her cry. Years later and guess what? She still cried at the drop of a hat. At what age would she grow out of that embarrassing habit?

Were her legs even shaved? She tossed the comforter to the side, threw a leg in the air, and felt it. Shit. They weren’t. And she knew he looked at her legs. Paxton loved her legs. Or he used to. Now they were rounder and her calf muscles were less defined and she hadn’t even shaved before wearing that skirt to work today!

But none of this mattered. It didn’t matter if he wanted her or she wanted him. That was kid stuff. That was teenager shit from over a decade ago and they were adults now. They were different people with different wants and needs and attraction wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. She’d dated plenty of jerks who were hot. Paxton had never been a jerk but maybe he was now! That thing about his job did seem set up to be a line to hook women. What was he gonna say next? He taught second graders math with swimming word problems about freestyle relay races? Was he gonna claim to do emotional labor, too? 

Devi rolled over and looked at the clock on her nightstand. It was four in the morning. Not an ideal time to text Eleanor. Or Fab. Or even friends on the east coast who would have no context for her problem but she could at least whine about running into her high school boyfriend and he was tragically still very hot. She pushed herself out of bed and went downstairs to the kitchen and found her mom, sitting quietly at the table, eating a banana. 

“My mattress is terrible, what’s your excuse?” Devi asked. Nalini gave her a half smile and then looked out the window. 

“I had heartburn. Do you think they nicked my esophagus when they went in to do the surgery?”

Devi tilted her head. “How would they even do that? It’s not even the same parts.” Devi moved her hand around her chest, thinking about where the surgeon would have to fuck up to do that. 

“You never know. I don’t trust surgeons, they’re too confident.” Nalini looked back at Devi. “What’s wrong with your mattress?”

“It’s like 15 years old, Mom,” Devi explained, opening the fridge and pulling out a bottle of water. “I’m gonna go get a new one this week.” 

“You’re working tomorrow, or, I mean today?”   
  
“Yeah, all weekend, then I’m off on Monday. I’ll probably go then.” Devi sat down at the table in her seat to the side of her mother. It felt empty at the table with just the two of them. “Did you tell Kamala I’m back?”

Nalini nodded and smiled. “I did, she said she’ll come over in a few weeks. They’re enjoying the last bit of summer before her boys start school.” 

“I can’t believe I’m excited to see her.” Devi took a drink of her water and turned to look out the window her mother’s gaze kept returning to. The sprinklers were on in the yard. Had she gotten up to turn them on or were they on a timer?   
  
“Anything exciting happen at work? I saw there was a big wreck on the news. Did you see anyone from there?”

“No, thankfully. No traumas tonight.” 

“Nothing else exciting?” Nalini asked and Devi furrowed her brows. Did she know? How? Why? No. She didn’t know. That was ridiculous. 

“Just a boring night. I did have a kid with terrible RSV. First one of the season, I guess. Poor thing. Just two years old, had to admit her. I hate admitting babies.” 

“A two year old is hardly a baby, that’s a toddler,” her mom said, finally looking at her. 

Devi rolled her eyes. “They’re all babies to me. Tiny little lungs and chunky thighs.” 

“You think the grass needs to be mowed?” Nalini changed the subject as Devi yawned. 

She looked out the window again. “Maybe?”

“Next weekend for sure,” her mom whispered. “I’m going back to bed. You should too.”

“I’m going,” Devi said, as she watched her mom head back up to her room. 

Being home was surreal. Usually, her mom came to visit her in Boston. Devi had only been home a handful of times since she’d graduated from high school. She came home for Kamala’s wedding, Trent and Eleanor’s spectacle that okay maybe Devi was partially to blame for, and a rare long weekend trip. 

Devi had been going 100 miles an hour since she left home and being home meant slowing down. It was uncomfortable, like when you get off a train and the ground doesn’t quite feel solid underneath you.    
  
Paxton had felt solid enough though and that was terrifying. 

Devi got a couple hours of sleep in before she texted the girls’ group chat. Fab didn’t live in Sherman Oaks anymore, she was up in San Francisco, leading a wellness startup that, last Devi heard, was studying how to better integrate healthcare technology into nursing homes. She came home much more often than Devi did. 

**DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **Why didn’t you tell me Paxton was still hot? That’s vital information I needed to know for when he SHOWED UP IN THE EMERGENCY ROOM.** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **omg is he okay?**

**ELEANOR TO GROUP:** **  
** **He’s fine and I'm sorry I don’t even notice anymore. I work with actors who used to be underwear models and the view I get most of Paxton is of him raiding my fridge so I really think of him more as my third child.**

**DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **Eleanor, how did you know he’s fine?** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **He definitely went to Eleanor’s house after he left the ER. Did he raid your fridge, Eleanor?** **  
** **  
** **ELEANOR TO GROUP:** **  
** **Nah. He had a beer and was mad that i didn’t warn him Devi was home**

**DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **What exactly did he say, Eleanor???? I NEED TO KNOW THE EXACT WORDS** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **Are you guys gonna get back together????? omg is this about the wedding pact?** **  
** **  
** **DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **No, we’re not gonna get back together and we didn’t make a pact!** **  
** **  
** **ELEANOR TO GROUP:** **  
** **He said he was happy you were home. That’s it.** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **That’s way less exciting than I was hoping for.**

**DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **It’s fine. You know. I don’t even care. He looked good and I just wish you had warned me about it. It’s disorienting.** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **He’s really fun these days, Devi, you should get back together.** **  
** **  
** **DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **What do you mean he’s really fun? And I just got here! Who says I’m dating?** **  
** **  
** **FAB TO GROUP:** **  
** **He’s fun! I went to talk to his class last year on career day because he had a couple of kids interested in robotics. It was cool. I had a good time, I think the kids did too? Idk I'm a terrible judge of whether a child is having fun or not.**

**DEVI TO GROUP:** **  
** **Eleanor, you’re suspiciously quiet. What else did he say?**   
  
Eleanor did not respond and Devi was forced to spend all day thinking about what Paxton may or may not have said on Eleanor’s couch.

Devi unpacked a few boxes before she got ready for work, but she didn’t have the space for all her shit so she cleared out her old dresser drawers and pulled out several boxes of stuff from the top of her closet, meaning to go through it, but when she opened the first box, there was an 8x10 of Devi and Paxton from the swimming pool. She closed the box quickly and vowed to go through it later. She couldn’t do it right now. 

She hauled the boxes downstairs where her mom was doing one of those dumb Youtube workouts in the living room.    
  
“Where are you taking those?”

“To the garage.” Devi didn’t pause on her way to the garage.

“Did you go through them first?” she asked, not stopping her weird over the head stretch. 

“No.” 

Nalini appeared in front of her too fast for a human being. Moms had some kind of special power or something. “If you don’t go through them, you’ll never go through them and they’ll sit in the garage forever and then there will be a storm and then you’ll get bugs that will just eat through the wet paper and then I’ll have to call the exterminator,” 

Devi put the boxes down in front of the door. “I have to go to work, Mom. And I need to use the top of the closet for stuff that matters, not all this junk from high school. I promise, I’ll go through the boxes, just not today.” 

She headed for the front door to put her shoes on and saw her mom lift the lid off the top box. Devi cringed.    
  
“That’s why you don’t want to go through the boxes,” she heard her mother say before placing the lid back on. 

“When do you go back to work?” Devi desperately tried to change the subject. 

“Not soon enough! That girl is not handling the pressure well, I heard the office is running consistently half an hour behind.” Nalini folded her arms across her chest. 

“Don’t call her a girl, she’s my age and she’s more than capable of handling your practice while you’re convalescing.” 

“You picked her, you’d know,” Nalini said under her breath. 

“You asked me to help you find someone and she is the most people pleasing person I’ve ever met.”    
  
Nalini smiled. “I do like that part of her. She’s the opposite of you. What a relief.” 

Devi picked up her purse. “You still have heartburn?”

“No, I’m fine.”    
  
“Okay because this morning you were worried the surgeon went on a walkabout so I’m just checking,” Devi said, furrowing her brow. Was everyone’s mother this difficult as an adult?   
  
“I don’t remember saying that but you can’t trust surgeons, they’re so arrogant.” Nalini walked over and adjusted Devi’s collar. “Remember that surgeon you dated? The one with the hair plugs? He was a nightmare.” 

“Tell me I can’t date until I’m 30, then make fun of everyone I date, I can’t win.” Devi rolled her eyes. 

“You have bad taste.” 

“I’m going to work now, don’t forget to eat something.” 

\--

**DEVI TO PAXTON:** **  
** **I’m off Monday, I assume since school hasn’t started you might be free? To go to Ikea?**

Devi waited uncomfortably, pacing back and forth in front of the admissions desk in the ER. Three days' notice was appropriate for a friend hang out, right? Should she have just called? No, she didn’t want to talk to him and hear his voice and she could always tell when he smiled even by phone, she couldn’t handle that kind of nostalgia right now. 

“Dr. Vishwakumar, we need you at bed 5,” a tech said, rushing by, hardly turning to Devi to deliver the information.    
  
“Got it.” She followed the tech as her phone vibrated. If she looked at it now, she couldn’t concentrate on whoever was in bed 5. Text reading later. 

But after the kid in bed 5 with a marble up her nose, there was a person experiencing homelessness who had severe sepsis in an open wound. Then a mild car accident where everyone was mostly fine but X-rays were always a good idea. Then an old lady who missed her dialysis, causing an infection. 

By the time Devi looked at her phone, she had more than one text but the only one she cared about, she pulled up and read quickly, on the off chance that someone else might need something right away. 

**PAXTON TO DEVI:** **  
** **Are we getting breakfast at Ikea or lunch? I’ll drive. I'm sure whatever you buy won’t fit in the back of your little car.**

Devi rolled her eyes. She could drive. She knew where it was and everything. And taking separate cars would probably be better. Putting some distance between them and less chances for awkwardness but her mental list of things she needed was pretty long and okay, so yeah that stuff probably wouldn’t all fit in her sedan. And he offered to drive. That was basically saving the planet, carpooling, right?   
**  
** **DEVI TO PAXTON:** **  
** **Lunch. Pick me up at 11 on Monday?**

Somebody came bursting through the doors and she threw back her head in frustration. Duty called. But before she could move to see where she was needed, the phone in her hand vibrated. 

**PAXTON TO DEVI:** **  
** **Bring your best ball jokes for the meatballs, see ya Monday.**

Fucking dork. Or wait. It was her that was the dork in that situation. Sigh. This was bad. This was dangerous. 

\--

Paxton picked Devi up at 11 sharp which worked perfectly because Nalini, who was not yet back at work, happened to go to the grocery store just before he showed up. Devi spent the last couple days deciding if she should tell her mother that Paxton Hall-Yoshida was taking her to Ikea. Despite Nalini’s initial harsh treatment of Paxton, once Devi and Paxton came clean about dating all those years ago, Nalini warmed to him but just barely. Just enough that she wasn’t openly mocking his intelligence at the dinner table anymore. She never did  _ like _ him, more like tolerated him. The nicest thing Devi could think that her mother had ever done was to allow a picture to hang on the wall from Devi’s graduation that had Paxton in it. Didn’t seem like much but a place on the wall was likely the highest praise one could ever get from Nalini Vishwakumar.    
  
As Devi got in the truck, she wondered if that picture was even still on the wall.    
  
They made small talk in the car, it went about as well as expected. He seemed to really hate small talk now.

“How’s Becca?” she asked, cringing as she watched a car change lanes without using a blinker. 

“She’s great. She works at a fashion house in San Diego, it’s called, uh…” Paxton trailed off, biting his lip. Oh god, he used to bite her lips. No. Bad Devi, don’t think about that!    
  
“Magic Muslin,” Devi provided. 

He looked over at her and smiled. “Yeah, you know it?”

“We’re Facebook friends.”    
  
Paxton made a face. “Why’d you ask then?”    
  
“I’m making polite conversation!” She reached over and pushed against his shoulder, a touch meant to lighten the mood, make it friendly, but unfortunately he was still very buff. The t-shirt he was wearing should have been illegal. He filled it out too well. 

“It’s just me! Stop doing that!” But before they could argue more, he pulled into a parking space and Devi could get out and brush off his demand. 

Small talk was best. It kept everyone at arm’s length and that was what she needed to do. 

They got their lunch on their trays, Devi tried to pay but he’d already told the cashier and paid for both their food. That made it feel more like a date and she could not be on a date. Not with Paxton. 

“So, hit me with your best ball joke,” Paxton said, stabbing a meatball with his fork and lifting it in her direction, playfully, from across the table.   
  
“I didn’t prepare any ball jokes,” Devi said, pressing her lips together tightly, trying not to smile at his goofy face.    
  
“Devi Vishwakumar didn’t prepare? You really have changed,” he said, before putting the meatball in his mouth. 

“At the behest of my therapist, I’ve learned you don’t have to be prepared for everything. It really cuts down on my stress and it’s not like I was gonna Google ball jokes. That would have been a bad move.” She looked down at her salmon. “Besides, I didn’t even order meatballs.” 

“I can’t actually think of any ball jokes personally, but I’ll ask the fifth graders when school starts and get back to you,” he said, a sly smile pulling at the corners of his mouth. There was a little gravy in one corner too but Devi resisted the urge to clean it for him. Had to stay away from his lips.

“I thought you taught second grade, not fifth.” Devi was proud of herself for looking him in the eyes and not at his stupid smile. 

“The elementary swim team is fourth and fifth graders, those fifth grade boys are the weirdest combination of knowing almost nothing about sex but having a large cache of dirty jokes.” 

Devi laughed, “That’s probably a really uncomfortable trip.”    
  
“Daily,” he said, pausing to look at her. Paxton just stared for a minute and Devi reached up to her own mouth, covering it. 

“Do I have something on my face?” she asked, unsure.

Paxton seemed to snap out of it. He shook his head and went back to his food. 

“How did you get into teaching, anyway?” Devi picked at her salmon. 

“Uh, it’s a long story,” he said, but Devi raised her brows and waited. If he hated small talk then this was the opposite. He gave a half shrug before he started. “My grandpa in Japan? He broke his leg, this was like, uh, eight years ago? Nine? Just when I’d finished undergrad. I didn’t have a job lined up and he needed some help, so I went to Japan for a year. I helped my grandparents and I fell into a gig teaching English to old ladies. They loved American crime shows so lessons were basically me explaining what idioms from  _ CSI _ meant. It was really fun but I didn’t think anything of it. It’s not really a job you can have here in the states, right? But the last month or so a friend got sick and couldn’t teach their kids English class. So I covered for her and I ended up loving it. And that  _ is _ something I could do here.” 

He was excited, but he held back, just a little, she could tell he wasn’t giving her everything. Did he think she’d make fun of him?   
  
“You just came home and started teaching?” she asked, unable to think of some other question that would put him at ease. But that seemed to be enough because he smiled wide, and put his fork down so he could start talking with his hands. He did that when he got excited. Or he used to. Or he still did. She was seeing it now.    
  
“That state is absolutely strapped for teachers so I took a 6 week certification for people with degrees, and I taught my first year. I taught eighth grade math. I wanted to die!” He put his hands in his hair and blew out a long breath. “It was so hard. But I still liked it enough that I went back to school and picked up some reading courses and early ed stuff. I switched to elementary and had a blast. This is gonna be my seventh year teaching. I love it.” 

Devi smiled, he was so animated, so happy. It was so easy to see he was being real. “You like school? That’s amazing. I love this.” 

Paxton blushed and looked away before looking back at her and smiling wide. “I do, too. I really love it.” 

She wondered how many women must fawn over him. A teacher? Helping little kids learn to read? They had to be lined up around the block. Maybe he’d married one of them and then divorced. Maybe he had a kid now. Oh god. No. Those were not questions she wanted to ask. What he did in the in-between time was none of her business. 

“I shoulda picked up a piece of cake,” Devi said, mostly to herself, annoyed that she’d let her thoughts travel down that dangerous road. 

His chair scraped across the floor before she even finished her statement. “I’ll get it.”    
  
“Hey, sit down, dude,” Devi said, reaching across and grabbing his wrist before he could fully stand up and go. “There’s ice cream at the end. I’ll eat that.” 

“I can get you cake,” he offered but Devi shook her head. 

“Sit down,” she commanded, with a slight grin, and he did. He listened, mirroring her face. 

“Paxton?” someone asked from behind them. Paxton’s eyes got wide. 

“Uh,” he dragged it out, while Devi turned around and saw a tall, white brunette approaching the table, eyes fixed on Paxton. “Uh, hi, uh.”    
  
The woman tilted her head, her too wide smile sort of plastered on by the time she stood at the end of their table. 

“Erin, hi, Erin,” Paxton pulled out at the last second and Erin looked relieved.    
  
“How’ve you been?” Erin asked him. 

Paxton scratched at his ear and looked at Devi, panicked. This was an ex. Devi knew it. From not remembering her name and the tension in his shoulders, she’d guess either a short term thing or it had been a long time ago. Not a hypothetical one he had a hypothetical kid with, someone else. Devi was a long time ago ex herself but this was uncomfortable to watch. 

Devi had not cured her impulsivity with age or therapy which is why she leaned across the table, put her hand over his, and said, “Hi Erin, I’m Devi.” That warm tone had gotten her plenty of free drinks in her life and now it was getting her a glare. 

Paxton’s entire aura changed. He swallowed, his shoulders relaxed, he looked at Devi like she was the only person in the world, but he didn’t smile, not quite, though he did when he looked back at the brunette. 

“Oh.” Erin said, and Devi could hear the moment when the wind was taken from Erin’s sails by the con Devi was running. “Nice to meet you.” 

“We’re just mattress shopping, you know, for the new bed,” Paxton explained. “What about you?”

“I needed a stepstool,” Erin said, looking back at Devi, her fake plastered smile was shrinking by the second. “And oh, my friend has our food, it was nice running into you!”    
  
Erin bolted like an Olympic sprinter and Devi moved her hand slowly off Paxton’s. She didn’t want Erin looking back to see her pulling back quickly, so slow and natural was fine. Did he always have a scar on the side of his thumb? That was new or since they’d dated. She didn’t dare ask about it. 

“Thank you,” Paxton said, sheepish. 

“You forgot her name.” Devi rested her chin on her hand. 

“I went on one date with her,” he defended. “Maybe two. She thinks charter schools are a good use of state money.” 

“And they’re not?” Devi tried to sound like she knew the answer but she really had no idea. 

“They take money from public schools and funnel them into useless bullshit learning facilities that often close without notice. I could give you a 30 point run down if you-”    
  
“Nope,” she cut him off. “You explained well enough. Charter schools suck. Got it.” 

“She didn’t take off her shoes in my apartment either.” 

“Two dates and she made it to your apartment?” Devi asked, tilting her head. 

“Anyways,” Paxton said, looking away, avoiding the question. “Mattresses, huh?”

Devi laughed and he turned to smile at her. “Right, mattresses.” 

They cleaned up their table, Devi tried to take her tray, but Paxton took it before she could, and when she tried to fight about it, he came close to her, and whispered in her ear, “Erin is gonna be a thing all day. She’s staring now and they’re about to finish eating, she’s gonna be following us through the store at this rate.” 

Devi rolled her eyes, but pushed on his shoulder and let out a too loud laugh that would have Erin, two tables over, very sure they were madly in love and picking out their new mattress for their new house that they’d just closed on and were about to conceive several children on. Not that Devi had put any thought into this con she’d started. (It was very easy to concoct something detailed and thorough, it’s not like she’d never thought about it with Paxton.) 

She considered grabbing his hand, but Devi was already feeling a little too invested in faking it so she held back. Paxton stayed close to her, but didn’t make any other moves to put on a show for Erin. They wandered easily through all the fake home setups, the tiny 500 square foot spaces, the kitchens that looked like Nancy Meyers movies, and finally, the beds. 

“You’re gonna want a new frame, right? Isn’t the bed in your room a full? That’s not big enough.” Paxton said, touching the footboard on a metal frame.    
  
“Yeah, but I already picked the frame out. I just need to figure out which mattress.” She cut across the floor and stopped at a mattress, pushing her hands into it.    
  
Paxton followed, stood at the foot of the mattress, and fell backwards like some kind of trust fall, bouncing a little when he landed. He rolled onto his side and looked at the tag. “Best for side sleepers.”    
  
“I’m a back sleeper,” she said, moving to the next mattress and pressing her hand down into the foam. 

Paxton moved to stand next to her. “You can’t pick a mattress by hand, you gotta lie down,” he said, just as he crawled onto the mattress. 

“No, I don’t,” Devi argued. Lying on a mattress with Paxton was the last thing she needed to do. 

He lifted up his head and rested it on his hand. “I can’t tell you if you’ll like it. I’m a side sleeper. This one seems fine but if you’re gonna be on your back…” 

Devi huffed. “Fine,” she said, crawling up the mattress, but leaving as large a gap between them as she could. Sure, nothing could happen in a fluorescent lit Ikea, but it wasn’t ever about what could happen, it was about how Devi couldn’t stop feeling the pull to be nearer to him, how being close to him felt good. Like muscle memory. But those muscles didn’t have memory anymore. Things were different now. It’d been too long. Or so she had to keep telling herself.

On her back, looking at the warehouse ceiling of the Ikea, Devi shifted in the bed, trying to see if it would be comfortable. 

“From your face, I guess this one isn’t it,” Paxton said, sitting up. 

“Yeah, not this one.” 

Paxton stood up and offered her his hand, she took it, and he pulled her up easily, but a little too quickly so she bumped into his chest. And just like in the ER on Friday night, she couldn’t bring herself to put space between them. He didn’t move either, and he was still holding her hand, their hands were the only thing between them. Devi pressed her lips together tightly, trying not to smile at him. There was no reason to smile except she was nervous and he was looking right at her, softly, like there was some joke he’d just remembered. His lips parted like he was about to say something and Devi didn’t want to know what would happen next so she turned and started walking.

“Thanks,” she said, moving to the next mattress. 

To his credit, Paxton didn’t miss a beat, he was flopping himself dramatically onto the next mattress she stood at. They hit every mattress in the showroom it seemed like, some Devi wouldn’t even lie down on after feeling them with her hand, more that she disregarded almost instantly. Paxton tried every one of the mattresses, teasing her as he went. 

“This one is pretty good.” He said on the tenth mattress, but he pulled up the tag and made a face. “It is expensive though.” 

“Thank god for zero percent interest rates on my Discover card,” Devi said, lying down and wiggling her body into the mattress. “Oh, this one is good.” She got comfortable and sighed. Then rolled on her side, facing Paxton, and moaned, just barely. Devi didn’t mean to make that sound but she had been sleeping on that terrible mattress at her mom’s house for too long and this mattress felt perfect. 

Paxton raised his eyebrows and smiled, sly. “Should i leave you alone with this mattress? You need a nap?”

Devi sighed, long and deep. “No, let’s just go put it in the back of your truck and take it home. Like right now. Do we have to walk the rest of the store?”

“It’s your show, Devi.” He reached over and pushed some hair behind her ear, her skin pebbled as his hand slid against her, and she tried not to gasp. He lowered his voice, “Sorry, uh, Erin is over there so…”   
  
“Oh.” Devi grinned, and reached over and pushed his curls from his forehead, avoiding the bandaid that covered his one stitch that she gave him. A great excuse to do what she’d wanted to do since Friday night. “Do you think the hair gel industry misses you? Surely, their sales went way down since you stopped plastering your hair to your head.” 

He sucked in air and sat up, pulling her up by the arm with him. “You’re hilarious, Vishwakumar.”    
  
Shit, he hadn’t called her that in forever, no one else had ever bothered to use her last name as a nickname. Most people found it too long or couldn’t pronounce it, but Paxton Hall-Yoshida was not most people. Was she ovulating? Because Paxton calling her by her last name really had her feeling warm. 

By the time they’d made it to the warehouse section, Paxton had picked up some dish towels for his apartment and a new pillow and Devi planned to trick him into letting her pay for them since he’d bought lunch. It was the only way this was fair and didn’t feel like a date. Okay, it still felt like a date but it wasn’t a date. He was helping her out. That’s all. Not a date. 

They gathered her bookshelf, bedframe, mattress, and a stray piece of art that she liked and checked out. Devi got a couple of ice cream cones at the snack bar and when she handed one to Paxton he leaned over and kissed the side of her head. Another thing he did constantly when they were teenagers. Devi closed her eyes while he did it and remembered that Erin must be in view and it was just pretend but that action knocked her off kilter. 

She’d dated plenty of people over the years but only one person had come close to the intimacy she’d felt when she dated Paxton in high school. Devi had convinced herself that the things she remembered about dating Paxton were better in her head. Everything seems warmer, smoother, better when you’re reliving it in your memories. The human brain did that. There were medical studies. She’d even read one for a paper once. But with his lips in her hair, against her head, the way he did it so casually, like he was born to do it, like he’d never stopped doing it, Devi considered that actually, the study was wrong. This was better than she remembered. 

And that was very unfortunate. 

“She’s gone now, and we can go, congrats on another successful con.” Paxton winked at her. “I’m gonna go get the truck, meet me at the loading spot?”

“Yep,” Devi said, feeling off balance. This was fine. 

On the ride home, her mom texted to let her know she was going into her practice to check on some things. It was for the best because she still didn’t want her mom to run into Paxton. It didn’t seem like a good idea. 

They hauled the flat boxes upstairs to her room and with almost no issue (okay, so they did put the bed frame together upside down but a Youtube tutorial later they fixed it) they put the shelf and the bed together. Paxton cleaned up all the cardboard packaging and Devi put the sheets on the bed and then rolled around on the mattress. That’s how he found her when Paxton came back up to her room. 

Devi was spread out, surely he would get the hint and not lie down next to her but before she knew it Paxton was next to her. He rolled on his side so he could look at her and Devi closed her eyes. She mirrored his position but kept her eyes closed and put her hands under her cheek. She made an exaggerated snoring noise. Paxton laughed. 

“I thought you were a back sleeper,” he said, a laugh in his voice still. 

“You’re on my bed, I don’t have room to spread out when someone else is here,” Devi said, not opening her eyes. 

“Alright, I’ll get out of here.” But he didn’t move. Instead, she felt his thumb on her shoulder. If anyone else had done this, she would have been confused, but she knew exactly what he was doing. She opened her eyes and saw him biting his lip, staring at a spot on her shoulder, rubbing his thumb over it.

“It’s not like it went anywhere,” she said.

Paxton brushed his thumb across the small scar and then looked at her, somber. “You ever think about how stupid that was, like as an adult, as a doctor, you ever think about how stupid it was to get that close to a wild animal?” He sounded mad. 

“I survived my own stupidity, and as I recall, you did all kinds of stupid things back then,” Devi said, defensive. 

“Yeah, like not keep an eye on you when you were at your first party.” Ugh. She couldn’t handle his guilt over something that happened 15 years ago and had turned out just fine. His overprotective streak had been a problem for them later so she was surprised he even dared bring it up. 

Devi reached for the small bandaid on his forehead and tapped next to it, eager to change the subject. “Great news. This one won’t scar.”

“Did you go to medical school to prove to the ER doctor you could do better?”

“No,” Devi said, a proud smirk filling her face. “But it was a nice bonus.” 

“You were drunk. You weren’t exactly staying still. He did his best.”

“Oh please.” Devi rolled her eyes. “I once put five stitches in a toddler who had seven cans of coke before he rammed his head into the corner of a coffee table. Did he scar? Yes, but barely. I’m very good at my job.” 

Paxton tried not to laugh. “I had fun today.”

“Me too.” Devi admitted, that was fine. She could admit she had fun. 

He paused, she could see him bite the inside of his cheek. “I missed you.”

Oh.

Devi tried not to visibly cringe. She missed him too but she had to tell him. “I’m seeing someone.”

“What?” He instantly changed, he was hurt, mad, annoyed. 

“A guy from Boston, I left in such a hurry I didn’t-“

“So break up with him.” He sat up, turning to Devi like his plan was obvious.    
  
“Excuse me?” Devi sat up too because how dare he? “Don’t tell me what to do.”

“ You broke up with me when you moved ‘cross country, why not him?”

“Because I left in a hurry. There’s no reason to just dump my boyfriend because I decided I had to be home.” Devi stood up, she had to put space between the two of them because her temper was boiling and she knew never to be near people when she was this angry. “And  what, you’re interested in me so I should just rearrange my life? Grow up!”

“I never stopped being interested in you!” Paxton shouted, frustrated. “Is this one of the things you needed to do before you ran into me? Get a haircut, replace the mattress in your bedroom, dump your boyfriend?”

“I didn’t know I’d come back and have you falling over yourself to get close to me! I thought you moved on!” 

“At the wedding we said-“

“I was 21! Everybody makes ridiculous plans when they’re 21!”

Devi’s mom opened the door and stood confused. “What’s going on?” Just what this situation needed, her mother making things worse. 

“Nothing, Dr. Vishwakumar,” Paxton answered firmly, keeping his eyes locked on Devi. He took a deep breath and shook his head, just barely, before turning to leave. 

“No wait,” Devi yelled, following him. “We’re not done!” 

“You should have told me. I thought, I thought since you were home and you asked for help, I’m an idiot,” he threw over his shoulder as he rushed down the stairs. 

“I don’t even know you anymore!” she said, walking behind him. 

“Yeah you do! And I know you!” He turned at the bottom of the stairs and looked at her, like he could somehow communicate what he wanted to say without speaking but she didn’t know how to do that anymore. It’d been too long. This was what she was talking about. He proved her point. 

“I should have told you but I literally forgot he existed when I bumped into you at work.” Maybe she was blaming him for what was definitely her fault. But he had no business being that hot! People were supposed to get uglier with age! It was unfair how good he looked!

“That doesn’t make me feel better.” He put on his shoes and walked out the door. 

Devi could follow him but there was nothing else to say. So she stood at the door and watched him get into his truck and drive away. 

“Guess he’s not staying for dinner,” Nalini said, coming down the stairs. Devi glared at her. 

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she said before heading back up the stairs to sulk in her room. That was a normal adult thing to do and she was gonna do it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you feel comfortable and are one of the people who is on tumblr and here, I'd love to connect who you are here with who you are on tumblr! You can talk to me either place! <3


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know what would be really bad? If Devi's boyfriend just showed up out of the blue without telling anyone. That'd be bad, right?

Paxton meant to get up and go for a run. It helped get him back into the schedule of waking up early for school after a long summer of sleeping late but after the day he had yesterday, when his alarm went off on his phone, he turned it off and then chucked the phone on the floor. He deserved to sleep in, this was his pity party.   
  
Yes, Eleanor and Trent had warned him that he should be prepared for the chance that Devi wasn’t interested in picking up where they left off, but somehow, her dating someone? That was worse. 

“Hey,” somebody said just before tiny fingers pulled at his toes at the end of his bed. “Wake him up.” 

Paxton opened his eyes to Trent standing at the foot of his bed and Teddy, the five year old, picking at Paxton’s toes. 

“Dude.” Paxton sat up, pulling his feet away and grimacing. “Leave my feet alone, I’m ticklish!” 

“Your toes are hairy,” Teddy said, annoyed. “I need a snack, Uncle Paxton.” 

“No they aren’t! And I don’t have any snacks,” he said, rubbing his eyes and then looking at Trent. “Why are you here?”

“I need to borrow your jigsaw.” Trent held Emma on his hip and was scrolling his phone.   
  
Paxton groaned. “I don’t have a jigsaw. My dad has one, I think, what do you need it for?” 

Teddy ran from the room and Trent followed him. “Teddy, he said he doesn’t have any snacks!” 

“No wait, I have goldfish crackers!” Paxton said, getting out of bed and grabbing a shirt from the chair. He made it to the kitchen and pulled down the bag of goldfish from the cupboard and handed them to Teddy. “Don’t make a mess, dude.” 

Paxton glanced at the clock on the stove. “It’s 8am? I’m taking my key back,” he said to Trent. 

“Gonna have to get the locks rekeyed. I already made three copies. If you walk into my house whenever you want, I’m gonna walk into yours.” Trent put Emma on the sofa. “I’ve got an idea for a reality show pitch but I need to build a desk first.” 

“Like, from scratch?” Paxton asked, knowing that Trent could barely put together Ikea furniture. Their house was decked out in West Elm and pieces Eleanor found at estate sales that looked overly dramatic, like she was. 

“Yeah, from scratch. Whatever, put some clothes on. Let’s go get the saw before my kids destroy your apartment.” As Trent finished, Teddy dumped the bag of goldfish crackers on the couch next to his sister who leaned over and started picking them up with her mouth like a puppy. 

Paxton definitely regretted giving Trent a key. 

When they were in the car, Trent snapped his fingers and turned, smiling wide, to Paxton. “How’d the Ikea not date go yesterday?”

Paxton immediately turned to the window to avoid Trent. 

“So, bad?” he asked, turning onto Paxton’s parents’ street. 

“Very.” Paxton debated telling him, but only for a second because if Trent knew and didn’t warn him, he was gonna be mad, but if Trent didn’t know about the boyfriend, that was a different ball game. It meant the boyfriend wasn’t important if Devi hadn’t shared. “She has a boyfriend.” 

“She what?” Trent asked just as he slammed on the brakes. 

“Hey,” Emma whined from the back of the car. 

Trent whipped around and checked on the kids. “Sorry sweetie, Daddy just got some news, everybody okay? Yeah you’re okay, those car seats cost more than the TV.” 

“So you and Eleanor didn’t know?” Paxton asked, just to verify. He wanted to get all this straight. He didn’t want to feel hopeful by the news but he couldn’t help but feel a little better. The boyfriend hadn’t been mentioned to them which meant he wasn’t that important. 

“Nah, man,” Trent said, parking the car in the Hall-Yoshida driveway. Paxton ran into the garage, grabbed the jigsaw, put it in the trunk, and then they headed to Trent and Eleanor’s. “Last I heard some dude dumped her after Christmas. I remember because it sounded like a real dick move. Devi probably got him a really good gift and then he bounced.” 

“That is a dick move,” he agreed. “So the boyfriend can’t have been a thing longer than what? Seven months?” Paxton asked but realized as he said it, seven months was a long time. It was longer than any of his relationships...except Devi. 

Eleanor was right, he had been living basically in a state of getting laid comfortably until Devi came home. And clearly, Devi had not been living like that. Paxton didn’t need to examine the difference or why, that would just gnaw at his insides and he’d end up feeling stupid, again, like he did when she told him about the boyfriend. 

“Did you have a big fight about the boyfriend reveal?” Trent asked, pulling Paxton out of his thoughts. 

“No,” Paxton lied. Trent looked over at him, his brows furrowed. “Yes. Like a little one. But only because she didn’t tell me all day. She let me build her furniture and lie down on mattresses with her and flirt and then she told me she had a boyfriend!” 

“Didn’t we tell you to not come on strong, man? We warned you!” Trent said, a Spiderman action figure flying to the front of the car. Trent picked it up without missing a beat and handed it back to Teddy. 

“We ran into Erin and then Devi was running a con, which by the way, nobody asked her to run, and she says she’s changed and I don’t know her? If I was given the setup of what happened to us at Ikea and asked ‘what do you think Devi will do in this situation?’ I would have aced it by knowing she’d con someone!”   
  
Trent pulled into his garage and narrowed his eyes at Paxton. “You’re gonna have to repeat some of that because I’m very confused.” 

They got the kids out of the car and went through the garage to the backyard where Trent had some 2x4s, some broken funny, some he tried to cut with a hand saw. Generally a mess.   
  
“What are you trying to do?” Paxton asked, confused, as the kids ran for the trampoline. 

“Building a desk. There’s gonna be a slot on HGTV and I’m gonna pitch for it,” he said, not seeming to grasp that he had zero qualifications for an HGTV show. 

“They usually rebuild whole houses, bro, why are you building a desk? And most of those shows are fake anyway, so is any of this even necessary?”

“Whatever,” Trent said, lining up the wood planks. “Tell me about the Ikea trip. You ran into Erin? The blonde Erin or the brunette one?”  
  
“I dated a blonde Erin?” Paxton asked, scratching his head. He did not remember her. 

“Yeah, but she was a little racist, so you only did one date. Brunette Erin was two dates and the school choice one, right?” Trent was measuring the planks now and marking with a pencil he’d produced from his bun. 

“How can you remember my dates better than I can?” 

“Dude, I’ve been married ten years and haven’t been invested in a TV show since _Friday Night Lights_ went off the air. I literally only watch what Eleanor is in or what she wants to watch. Your love life _is_ my entertainment.” 

Paxton’s brows furrowed. “That’s kinda bleak.” 

“Nah, I have other hobbies too, c’mon, and honestly, I hope Eleanor never leaves me because I love her to the ends of the earth and watching you date?” Trent gagged. “Being married is like a thousand times better.” He handed Paxton the measuring tape. “But yes, it’s easy to remember the Erins because you mostly date girls that look like Devi so the white girls stand out.” 

“No I don’t,” Paxton defended.   
  
“Yeah, you do.” Trent didn’t even stop what he was doing to argue. “Anyway, so you ran into brunette Erin and what happened after that?” 

Paxton grumbled for a second because no, he didn’t date that many women that looked like Devi. Like maybe he’d dated three, or maybe four. Maybe...you know what? It didn’t matter.

“Devi caught on that Erin was an ex so she pretended to be dating me so that…” Paxton stopped. Actually, why did Devi do that? What was the purpose? “Anyways we pretended all through Ikea and it was awful.” 

“And by awful you mean it was the best day of your life because you got to do dumb shit like kiss her hair and hold her hand,” Trent said, really nailing exactly what Paxton felt. 

“We didn’t hold hands,” he said, like that made it better.

Teddy came running up to Paxton and handed him a hair tie and then turned around in front of him like Paxton was supposed to know what to do. “You gotta have your dad do that, I don’t know how to get your hair up, dude.” 

Trent dropped the wood he was organizing and gestured for Teddy to come closer so he could put his hair up. “You know this isn’t hard, right? Surely this is a skill that an elementary school teacher should know?”

“I’m always afraid I’m gonna tug their hair too hard,” Paxton admitted. 

“What are you gonna do if you have kids, man?”   
  
“The only person I’ve ever considered having kids with has a boyfriend, Trent, that’s why we’re talking right now.” 

“What are you doing?” Eleanor came out of the house, confused. 

“He says he’s building a desk,” Paxton supplied. 

“Sweetie, are you high? You do not build things.”   
  
“I’m the primary caretaker for our children,” Trent scoffed, offended. “I am not high, that’s for the podcast recording and after they go to bed. I’m going to pitch to HGTV about-”   
  
“No, no you’re not,” Eleanor cut him off. “Is this about Teddy going to kindergarten? I told you, it’s not that big of a deal. You’re gonna be fine.” 

“He’s too little to go, don’t you think we should hold him back a year? He’s still working on his letters and you know that boys can fall behind easily.” 

“Don’t hold Teddy back,” Paxton butt in. “He’s totally ready for kindergarten. He’ll run circles around most of the kids there.”   
  
“You shut up,” Trent said, pointing at Paxton, mad.   
  
“Stop trying to pitch a TV show because you’re sad.” Eleanor walked over to him and reached for his face. “You wanna have another baby? We can have another baby.”   
  
“I should go,” Paxton said, feeling very uncomfortable. Although Trent had driven him here so he didn’t really have a way to go.   
  
“Don’t joke about that, E, you know I want to. We’ll go in the house right now, Paxton can watch the kids while I just-”   
  
“I can hear you talking! Please, stop!” Paxton shouted, he didn’t want to know any of this. 

Eleanor turned to look at Paxton, her brows furrowed. “Wait, what happened with the not date?”  
  
“She has a boyfriend,” Trent said, taking Eleanor’s hand from his face and kissing it. She turned back to Trent, shocked. 

“Devi didn’t tell me about that,” she said. Trent shrugged. “Maybe she made it up because he was coming on too strong?” 

“She let me build her Ikea furniture and then sprung it on me, I don’t think she’s lying. Why even bother lying? We just ended up fighting about it,” Paxton explained. 

“I didn’t know about a boyfriend, why didn’t she tell me?” Eleanor frowned. 

“Maybe she’s aware that putting us in the middle of her and Paxton’s fights isn’t exactly fun for us?” Trent asked, then scoffed. “Nah, that’s not it. That’d be too considerate.” 

“Fuck you,” Paxton said, immediately feeling ridiculous for defending Devi, the person he was actually mad at. 

“Oh,” Eleanor snapped her fingers and turned back to Trent. “Speaking of Devi, Fabiola is coming down this weekend for a conference and she’s coming over Thursday night.” 

“You want me to take the kids out?” Trent asked. 

“No, she won’t even get here until close to bedtime anyway,” Eleanor explained. “I’m gonna make rice crispy treats, we’ll watch a movie, it’s gonna be fun.” 

“Yes, rice crispy treats!” Trent put his arm in the air like a little kid. “ I’ll order food.” 

“You should come too, Paxton,” Eleanor said, as Emma wandered over and reached her arms up to be picked up. 

Paxton shook his head. “Devi’s gonna be here, I assume? I thought we weren’t all allowed to hang out or it would look like a date.”  
  
“Turns out she has a boyfriend and Fab will be here so you gotta. You love Fab.” Eleanor picked up Emma and put her on her hip. 

Paxton did love Fabiola. She even came down and helped him when he had a student last year who was obsessed with robots. 

“You think you should clear the invitation with Devi first?” Paxton asked, half serious, half mocking for the way that up until this point, they seemed to take Devi’s side on everything. Trent rolled his eyes. 

“She didn’t tell us she had a boyfriend, I don’t need to ask her permission to have my best friend at my house.” 

“Yeah but I’m gonna skip this one,” Paxton said, shaking his head. 

“I don’t know why, you’re gonna end up apologizing to her before then. Today is Tuesday, this will happen on Thursday, you’re gonna be at her doorstep…” Trent squinted, thinking. “Probably tonight but tomorrow by the latest.”

“Hey,” Paxton said flatly. “Shut the fuck up.” 

Eleanor sighed, annoyed. 

“This entire situation has made you very short, Paxton,” she said, and Paxton threw up his hands in frustration. 

“I was very happy. Content even, until Devi came home and fucked everything up.”

“You’ve been waiting for her to come home, you’re just hurt that she wasn’t waiting for you too,” Trent said, nonplussed by his outburst. 

It was the kind of tone Paxton would use himself on an unruly student, calm and unbothered, trying to fix the problem. And it only made Paxton more irritated. But he bit the inside of his cheek and rolled his shoulders to try and control himself.   
  
That was the real problem. He spent the last ten years waiting for Devi to come home. Paxton figured out what he wanted to do with his life and he’d done it. He was happy with his career, he was happy with his social circle, he was happy with his family. But he was in a perpetual state of waiting. And that was fine. He hardly noticed the waiting. He didn’t mind it. 

It was her coming back that wasn’t working. 

Now he could understand what Devi meant when she said she wasn’t ready to see him yet. He wasn’t ready either because it never occurred to him that they wouldn’t just jump right back in, that things wouldn’t go back to the way they were when they were in high school. Devi hadn’t come home for him, she’d come home for her mom. And that was fine. That was good and Paxton understood it. He supported it because even as rocky as that relationship was, it was vital and precious to Devi. But clearly, he needed to adjust his expectations. 

She hadn’t come home for him. 

But she was home. 

His friend Devi was home and if friendship was all that was on the table, he wanted that. He wanted her. No caveats, he would take Devi as a friend over no Devi. 

But Paxton wasn’t gonna tell Eleanor or Trent that they were right. He didn’t have the humility to reach that far. 

\--

Devi’s new bed was great. Unfortunately, she hadn’t been able to enjoy it because since she came clean with Paxton, she’d been miserable. Two nights in a row now she tossed and turned. Tuesday she went into work, having changed shifts with Dr. Reynolds so she could be off when Fabiola was in town, but it didn’t matter that she’d been on her feet for 10 hours, she couldn’t get comfortable in her bed and she didn’t sleep well. 

She was ignoring her boyfriend’s calls because coming face to face with Paxton, just being in the same room with him, felt like she was cheating. They hadn’t done anything. But Devi couldn’t stop thinking about the way he touched her. She had a running list now of all the times he’d touched her since she got back and that felt like cheating. Just having that list. 

(Her elbow at the ER, he took her hand to help her up and he just kept holding her hand, he pushed her hair behind her ear, he kissed the side of her head, twice his hands brushed hers while they were building the damn bed, he put his whole thumb on her scar.)

And Devi would never tell Paxton, but she tried to break up with her boyfriend. He was just so pathetic and mad that she was uprooting her whole life in Boston to move home that he managed to talk her into trying long distance. She should have said no. But Devi felt guilty about that too, just walking out on her life in Boston because she wanted to be with her mom. Now that she was here, that nagging feeling had receded but in its place a new one. Happy (despite her mother being difficult) but restless. Not quite settled. That new feeling hadn’t come until she ran into Paxton. 

But when Paxton had the nerve to suggest she dump her boyfriend, it set something off in her. She made her own choices and she didn’t need his input. She survived plenty of years without his _Devi’s In Trouble_ radar and she didn’t need his help extricating herself from her own messes. 

Devi rolled onto her stomach, fluffing her pillow and adjusting her comforter.

The fact that he was even still here and single and apparently had been waiting for her? Didn’t seem real. They both agreed that if she came home they’d try again. But she never believed it. He was too good to be true. He was always too good to be true. Devi, awkward nerd and overachiever should never have been able to land the school’s hottest guy. But she did. And he loved her. God, when she thought back to the things he said to her in high school, it was right out of a movie or a romance novel or in several cases, her own wildest fantasies. 

But Devi grew up. 

And she learned that many men didn’t listen and they didn’t share their feelings and a lot of them weren’t kind. Even if they wanted her. 

Besides all that, Paxton had this thing about cheating. He didn’t have to say it, she knew that was part of why he was mad she hadn’t told him about her boyfriend before. His lines for cheating were much further away than what she’d consider cheating. Maybe that’s why she felt so guilty. He definitely would have catalogued everything they’d done as cheating. Ugh. Not that there was anything wrong with his definitions of cheating, but she’d flirt for free drinks or an extra donut (it’s possible all her flirting was food and drink related). 

The sound of a lawnmower woke her up entirely too early and she groaned. Devi managed to fall asleep around 5AM and someone was mowing the lawn at 9AM. She burrowed under her pillow but it was no use. She was awake and tired, but she rolled out of bed because she couldn’t stand to toss and turn anymore.   
  
“Mom!” she shouted down the stairs. “Why is someone mowing the lawn at 9 in the morning?”

Nalini popped her head around the corner to shout back up the stairs, “It’s going to be 90 degrees today. You think he should mow at noon just so you can rest and he can get heat stroke? You want to get sued? You want to go out and give medical assistance when he passes out?”

“Mom,” she whined. “I work from 2-2. I’m exhausted!” 

“You should have gotten six hours easily, Devi. Go take a shower, he’ll be done soon and then you can go back to sleep. Better yet, you can go through those boxes in the garage!” 

Devi threw her head back and groaned at the ceiling. Fine. She’d get up and shower. But when she headed for the bathroom she saw the toilet was clogged. Again. 

“Mom,” she shouted again down the stairs. “The toilet!”

Nalini came around the stairs quickly this time. “Use my bathroom! I’m going to call someone about your toilet.”

That was unusual. Devi expected her mother to tell her where the plunger was and suggest she do it herself. And she was gonna call someone? Like someone she had to pay to fix the toilet? 

Before she got in the shower, her phone buzzed with a text. 

**JORDAN TO DEVI:  
** **You’re home, right?**

Ugh. She didn’t want to FaceTime with her boyfriend on four hours of sleep. 

**DEVI TO JORDAN:  
** **Yeah but I’m exhausted. Maybe tomorrow?**

She hopped in the shower and instead of thinking about her boyfriend, she thought about how best to apologize and move on with Paxton. They could be friends, right? They started as friends. They had even sort of been friends after they broke up when she went to Princeton. That worked for a while.

Maybe if they were friends, that restless feeling would settle and she could feel just right at home. 

By the time she was finished washing her hair she’d settled on texting him to apologize. Or maybe she’d find out where he lived from Eleanor and go to _his_ front door. 

Devi turned off the shower and reached for her towel. In her rush and irritation, she’d forgotten the towel for her body so she used the towel for her hair, giving a cursory dry of her hair and then wrapping it around her body. 

The door opened and Devi screamed, “Mom!” 

But it wasn’t her mom. 

It was Paxton. 

He had the decency to look surprised at least. 

“What are you doing here?” Devi held the towel at the top, where the seams met in the middle and shrunk herself, noting the towel meant for her hair didn’t actually cover her entire body, a slit of skin was visible the length of the towel.

“Your mom said the toilet was clogged, she didn’t say you’d be in here,” he said, trying to keep his eyes on her face but he kept looking down. 

“She called _you_ to fix the toilet?” Devi asked, incredulous.

“No, I was mowing the lawn so she just came out and asked.” His gaze fell to her shoulder, he was obsessed with her scar. She resisted the urge to cover it with her hand just to be petty. 

“Wait, you mow the lawn? You’re the reason I’m up so damn early?” Devi glared at him. 

“It’s gonna be hot today and your mom prefers I do it early. She won’t shut up about heat stroke.” 

“How did you end up mowing my mom’s lawn? Does she even pay you?” Devi asked. He was biting his lip and Devi felt warm and not from the shower.

“No, she doesn’t pay me,” Paxton let out a small laugh. “I consider it my good deed for the month. I do my parents’ lawn and I come over and do you… I mean yours,” he sputtered. “The lawn. I come over and mow the lawn.” 

Devi took a step closer to him, wondering what he’d do. The bathroom was humid from her shower and he looked just as wet as her though his from mowing in the heat. 

“How long have you been doing that? Mowing the lawn for her?” She took another step creeping into his space in the small bathroom. He could step back but he didn’t. 

He pressed his lips together and kept his eyes on hers before answering. “I don’t know, maybe three years?”

“You’ve been ingratiating yourself to my mom for years?” Devi asked with a half smile. People weren’t nice to her mom. She was a known nightmare. 

“It’s not a big deal,” he said with a shrug and an obvious glance at that strip of skin along the length of the towel. Devi stood up a little straighter, widening it. “You’d be nice to my parents.”

There was no way to win this. If he kept his eyes on hers, they had to stare at each other, when his eyes wandered, Devi felt that familiar pull in her gut that had her remembering the way he touched her. Surely she’d had better sex since high school, but she couldn’t remember a specific time at the moment. 

She felt a water droplet from her hair slide across her collarbone and down her cleavage. If she didn’t feel it, she could have just followed Paxton’s eyes as he tracked it. She saw him gulp. Paxton reached out, moving some hair off her shoulder so he could see her scar. It snapped Devi out of that hazy feeling and she rolled her eyes at him. His own injury from the other night was uncovered.   
  
“Dumbass,” she muttered, reaching out to touch his forehead. “You have to keep that covered. The stitch hasn’t dissolved yet.”   
  
He grabbed her wrist before she touched his forehead.   
  
“It’s fine, the bandaid just fell off while I was sweating.”   
  
She shook her wrist and he let go. Still holding her towel closed in one hand, she turned to dig in the medicine cabinet and get a bandaid out.   
  
“I’ll do it myself,” he said, annoyed.   
  
“Don’t be a baby, I got it,” she countered. “You think I’m gonna drop my towel? It’s not like you haven’t seen it before.”   
  
“I doubt your boyfriend would like that,” he said. He clenched his jaw as she placed the bandaid, impressively one handed. 

“God, shut up about my boyfriend,” Devi said, realizing too late that it sounded like she didn’t care about her boyfriend. “I don’t want to fight about it.” Nice save.

“I’m not fighting about it,” he said, taking a step closer to her now, he leaned in and she inhaled, her lips parted, he was coming to kiss her. But he didn’t, he moved to the side, leaning down to pick up the plunger. “You wanna watch me do this or you gonna get dressed?”

Devi closed her eyes for a second, feeling stupid. Of course, flirting was over. 

\--

Thank god, plunging the toilet was mindless because his mind was pretty loud at the moment. 

Devi had a boyfriend. Naked, in a too small towel, she still had a boyfriend, even if she was moving towards him like she could eat him up. And the goal was to be her friend. She had a boyfriend and whatever she was pulling earlier, that didn’t matter. She had a boyfriend and he wanted to be her friend. 

The thing was, it was easy. He’d come over hoping to avoid Devi, even if he decided that he wanted to be her friend, he thought it would take more work, one of them would have to apologize, it would need to be sorted. But he walked into that bathroom and almost instantly they were back on level ground. (Despite the ground being very warm and parts of his body responding very acutely.) She didn’t even seem mad at him. He forgot that he was mad at her. And maybe they were flirting but it was always easy to be with her, that’s what had hooked him in the first place back in high school. 

“Did you get it?” Nalini shouted as she came up the stairs. 

“Mom, leave him alone, haven’t you exploited his free labor and kindness enough?” Devi met her mom in the hallway as Paxton finished. He washed his hands and both Vishwakumars were now crowding the bathroom. 

“You need an actual plumber,” he explained. “I fixed it for now but you really need a professional. I think my mom has a guy if you don’t. I’ll send you the information.” 

“Ooooh, what we need is to remodel the bathroom,” Devi said, excited. 

“It would be good to get that fiberglass tub out of there and do a whole shower, some nice subway tile,” Paxton agreed, fingering a bit of worn out caulk on the side of the shower.

“Yes, I love that plan. But something flashier than subway tile.” Devi put her hands out like Vanna White. “Mirror tile!” 

Paxton shook his head no on the mirror tile and Devi frowned at him. 

“Not only do I not have the budget for that, it takes forever,” Nalini said, raining on the parade. “There would be people constantly in the house and then you have to share a bathroom with me and you take forever to get ready.” 

“She has a point, you do take a long time in the bathroom,” Paxton said, turning to Devi. 

“I don’t like this new thing where the two of you get along.” Devi folded her arms. “Go back to hating each other.”

“I never hated him,” Nalini said, but both Devi and Paxton scoffed. 

Downstairs, the door opened.   
  
“Is that Kamala? Was she coming over today?” Devi asked, unable to guess who else would just open the front door. 

“No, she said she’d come after school started,” Nalini explained, heading for the stairs.   
  
The three of them moved downstairs and at the door was a tall, white guy with sandy blonde hair.   
  
“Hey, Devi!” He was inside the house already. He’d just let himself inside. 

“Jordan,” Devi sounded slightly off, but she went to hug him. Oh, this was the boyfriend. What was he doing here?

“Nice to see you again, Dr. Vishwakumar,” Jordan said before turning to Paxton, Devi now off to the side of him. “And-”  
  
“Take your shoes off,” Paxton said to him. It was as neutral as Paxton could make it. This wasn’t his house but he knew and followed the rules here and this guy should have known.   
  
“Excuse me?” Jordan asked, his head tilted. 

Devi cringed.   
  
“Take your shoes off, or if you’re not staying, we can talk on the porch,” Nalini said. 

“Oh, sorry.” Jordan stood fumbling at the door with his shoes. 

When he finally managed, Devi gave a tight smile. Jordan offered his hand to Paxton. “Jordan Bishop.” 

Paxton took it and maybe squeezed a little too firm. “Paxton Hall-Yoshida” 

“Heard you guys talking about the bathroom, are you the contractor?”

Nalini snorted and Devi cringed again. 

“Nope.”  
  
“Plumber?”

“I’m a teacher, thanks.” 

“He’s a family friend,” Devi said and Paxton looked over at the wall behind him looking for, yep, it was still there.   
  
“Yep, family friend.” He pointed to the photo. “Here I am on the wall.” It was a picture of Devi’s graduation day. Eleanor and Fab on one side of Devi, Paxton on the other. His hand was on her waist. He was kissing the side of her head. 

Jordan leaned over and looked and then glanced at Devi. “Oh.” 

Paxton winked, Nalini covered a laugh, and Devi glared at him. She turned to Jordan. “Let’s go talk in the living room. Don’t you have to go, Paxton?”

“No, I need him in the kitchen,” Nalini said. He followed her there but she just dug in the fridge and pulled out half a cake from the store and put it on the island. She pulled a couple of forks out of the drawer and handed him one. “You want to be here for this.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah,” she said, a small smile on her face. 

“You can’t seriously like that guy?” he asked her, digging into the opposite corner of the cake as she did. 

“She has terrible taste in men.” She ate a bite of cake and Paxton looked at her sideways. “Oh, I’m including you, too, in that. I thought her moving here would mean no more of him but he’s here! In my house! The least we can do is make him uncomfortable so maybe he’ll leave.” 

They stood around picking at the cake. Nalini explained It was a get well soon cake that her staff brought over after she came home from the hospital and it was entirely too large so they’d been eating it for a week. 

At first, the conversation in the other room was impossible to hear, but the longer they stood there, the easier it was to eavesdrop. Things were not looking good for Jordan. Devi didn’t like the surprise of him showing up without telling her.   
  
“You can’t just hop a red eye and be mad that I’m busy! I have to go to work!” 

The shouting got louder. 

“I needed to come home!”   
  
“That makes no sense! Your mom is fine! What is so important here? You just left! You quit your job and you left, I was lucky I happened to be home because I think you would have left without saying anything to me!” 

Oh, so they were living together. Paxton filed that information away. He glanced at Nalini who looked surprised. Seemed like it was new to her, as well. 

“I need to be home. I can’t explain to you why. I just had to be. So now I’m here! I didn’t dump you,” she said. Something in her tone put Paxton on edge and he stood up straighter. He didn’t want to interfere but maybe he should. 

“But you haven’t answered a call since you left! I get a random response to a text but that’s it!”  
  
Devi could say all she wanted that she and Paxton didn’t know each other anymore, but he was well aware of her out of sight, out of mind attention span. He didn’t want to take all the credit for it, but he thought he was definitely a slim part of her not answering her boyfriend’s calls.

“I don’t understand what is more important here, what makes it necessary that you are home? Your mom is fine! Why would you move back when you were at the top of your career in Boston? Why move into your mom’s house? Why are you here? I get it, you had to come home when you thought she was sick but she’s fine!” Jordan’s voice boomed a little louder at each question and Paxton didn’t like it. He was too aggressive. 

“Hey, hey, hey, sorry,” Paxton said, not being sorry at all, as he rushed into the living room. “You guys are getting pretty loud so let me take a swing at this and remind you that Devi’s dad died-” 

Jordan’s face was red and just as Paxton worried, he looked very intimidating. He was angry and Devi’s temper could go toe to toe with anyone’s but Paxton was concerned about the way Jordan was standing so close to her, making his already tall frame feel larger.

“Paxton, go home. You don’t need to rescue me and I don’t need to fight a battle on two fronts.” She took his arm and walked him to the door this time, leaving Jordan fuming in the living room. 

“He’s being a dick. If he doesn’t understand why you had to come home-”

“Knock it off! You don’t need to explain my specific trauma to my boyfriend! You’re not special because you happen to know all the context!” 

Paxton was taken aback. “You didn’t tell him? Does he not know?”

“It hasn’t come up.” Devi moved some hair out of her face and he saw she was flushed from the fighting.   
  
“How has it not come up?”   
  
“I don’t start all my dates with ‘Hey, my dad died when I was 15 and it fucked me up for a couple of years after so make sure to handle me with care!’ I’m far enough away from the event that I can like...live my life!” 

“I think it’s pretty crucial context in the fight you’re currently having,” Paxton offered and Devi’s nostrils flared.   
  
“The fight I’m currently having is with you! This is none of your business!” Devi opened the door as he slipped on his shoes. 

“Forget about me, pretend I’m not even here, it sounds like you should dump your boyfriend.” He leaned in close to her. “You deserve better than a guy who hasn’t bothered to even ask about your dad. Who doesn’t understand why you need to be home with your mom.” 

“Don’t think if I dump him I'm coming straight to you! Maybe I'll find Ben Gross and do him for a while! If you can revert to 16 year old you, I'll revert right back to 15 year old me!” Devi shouted and Paxton walked out of the door, backwards. 

“Pretty sure he’s married!” Paxton yelled back.   
  
“Great! It will be just like old times then! I’ll be the other woman for a day or two just to piss you off!” She slammed the door but not before Paxton gave her the hardest look he could muster. 

Paxton hated when Devi joked about cheating and he hated that her boyfriend was awful and she wasn’t dumping him. He hated everything even more now that he wasn’t in a place to eavesdrop and had to trust that she could handle herself with her aggressive boyfriend. Dr. Vishwakumar wouldn’t let anything happen and he was definitely being too protective and he’d likely hear from Devi about that later but all he could do was load up the lawnmower in the truck and go home. 

So much for being friends with Devi being easy.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Devi gets together with the girls for a slumber party, Eleanor asks about Paxton's cheating ~thing~ and a tentative truce is reached between Devi and Paxton.

Devi was resigned to not sleeping well. This was it. This was her life now. Expensive mattress? Fucking useless. Setting things in her life right? Oh sure, that might help, but at what cost? It was a good thing she learned to run on almost no sleep in med school because this feeling was taking her back. 

She should just apologize to Paxton. Get it over with. Take the L and admit that whatever his hang ups were, he meant well. Devi was well aware of her contrarian nature. If someone pushed, she pulled, just to prove it could be done differently. It meant a lot of her time was wasted but when it worked (about half the time) she felt vindicated so she never learned to stop that. 

It didn’t help that Jordan was mad at her now too. Though that was very low on the list of things she was worried about. Devi was now in a predicament. She had to dump her boyfriend but it couldn’t be because Paxton told her to do it (twice now!) Maybe she’d dump him and then when Paxton asked, she could just lie. Say they hadn’t broken up. Or better yet, say he cheated on her. But then Paxton would feel bad for her and want to commiserate and Devi couldn’t handle that lie. She didn’t want Paxton to know he was right but she didn’t want to lie to him. Jesus. Even her figuring out how to dump her boyfriend was more about Paxton than poor Jordan. Devi would eventually need to confront the way Paxton was her biggest concern in everything. 

But not tonight. 

Devi showed up at Eleanor and Trent’s house with two bottles of wine and a bag full of Korean face masks, ready to party like the old days. She noticed the stroller on the porch and was a little uneasy. The group chat between her and Fab and Eleanor was still pretty constant but Devi didn’t come home hardly at all so she didn’t hang out with her friends in person and she saw pictures of the kids on Facebook but Eleanor as a mom was a thing Devi could mostly ignore. An identity that Devi didn’t have to see on her friend, but like Eleanor being dramatic or a little neurotic, this was just part of who she was. Eleanor had kids and Devi wasn’t gonna let that make things weird. It was a Devi problem to get over. She treated kids at work all the time. This was fine. 

“My darling!” Eleanor answered the door, hugging Devi and whisking her into the house. “And you brought wine? Fantastic! Thank god you didn’t bring food because Trent ordered way too much.”

Devi smiled, wide. Eleanor had candles going in her comfortable living room. Devi had only been in the house once before but it felt so warm and cozy and she loved it. 

“I feel bad that this is the first time we’re actually hanging out in person since I’ve been here two weeks,” Devi said, following Eleanor to the kitchen. 

She offered Devi a drink and took the bottles of wine from her. Eleanor wasn’t kidding, the island was covered in takeout boxes. There were Chinese food containers and a veggie tray from the grocery store, and a pan of rice krispie treats that Devi knew Eleanor made. It wasn’t hard to make them but Eleanor considered them a specialty of hers. 

“Yeah,” Eleanor said, opening the wine and pouring them each a glass. “Kinda weird that you’ve seen Paxton like double the amount of times you’ve seen me.” Eleanor’s tone was light but Devi suspected there was just a pinch of irritation in it.    
  
Devi closed her eyes and groaned.    
  
“Triple the times, since yesterday,” she admitted and Eleanor’s eyes widened. 

“What happened yesterday?” Eleanor asked as Trent came down the stairs.

“Kids down!” Trent made finger guns at Eleanor and then smiled when he saw Devi. Trent hugged her, Eleanor handed her a glass, and they all moved to the couches. “Devi! What’s up?” 

“Shut up, she saw Paxton yesterday,” Eleanor said, shortly and Trent gave Eleanor an over exaggerated look of surprise. 

“Damn, I shoulda put money on that because I was right,” he said to Eleanor, then turned to Devi. “Did he show up at your door to apologize?”

“No.” Devi made a face. “Did you know he’s been mowing my mom’s lawn?” Trent and Eleanor both nodded. “For three years?” They nodded again. “Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“Didn’t seem important,” Eleanor answered. 

“So he didn’t apologize, he mowed the lawn and…” Trent gestured with his hand for Devi to go on. 

“And then he unclogged the toilet and then my boyfriend showed up and then all hell broke loose,” Devi said, before she retold the story from the day before, leaving out a few parts she didn’t think were necessary like the bathroom flirting and most of the particulars of the fight with Jordan. But she did give a pretty thorough play by play of her fight with Paxton. 

“And then, I was so angry, I was so mad at him for butting in and telling me what to do, that’s the second time he told me to dump my boyfriend,” Devi explained and Eleanor interrupted.    
  
“The boyfriend you didn’t mention to me but we’ll circle back to that later, go on.”    
  
Devi cringed but went on, “So I said ‘maybe I’ll go find Ben Gross and be the other woman for a while, just to piss you off.’” 

“Devi, you did not say that to him,” Trent said, shaking his head. 

Devi looked away and looked back, moving her shoulders and generally being restless because yes, she did and she knew she shouldn’t have.    
  
“Maybe not exactly those words but pretty close to that.”    
  
“You know his thing with cheating, even joking, he hates that shit.” Trent looked genuinely concerned.    
  
“I know, I know.” Devi hung her head, properly chastised by Trent. Eleanor, though, was shaking her head and looked confused.    
  


“I don’t understand. What thing about cheating?” she asked. “What did I miss?”

“You tell her, I can’t do it,” Devi said to Trent and he sighed. 

“Okay so we gotta go back in time to Paxton rolling into Sherman Oaks High as a freshman.” 

Eleanor widened her eyes. “Okay, going way back in the catalog I guess, but sure.” 

“So Paxton is a fresh faced kid, coming in nervous because you know, the shift from middle school to high school? Terrifying. Top of the food chain to the bottom again. And I wasn’t there, we were all still in eighth grade, so it’s Paxton, it’s Eddie, Marcus I think? Can’t remember. I wasn’t there. So this junior, she was in student council or something, but not like you guys were in student council,” Trent tilted his head and shrugged. 

“Yes, we were nerds, move on Trent,” Devi pushed. 

“She’s hot and she’s a junior and she starts fucking Paxton after school.”    
  
Devi looked away and Eleanor was horrified. “Is this crucial information for the story?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” Devi added as Trent nodded. 

“That’s so gross, like there are so many lines about consent and...oh god, we have kids.” Eleanor covered her mouth and generally looked disgusted. “We have kids! Oh my god. Kids go to school and this shit happens. We can’t send them to school. Trent, this is horrible to think about, what the hell?”

“I know, E, I know.” Trent reached for Eleanor’s knee and tried to console her. “I’m not going to use this as further proof that we should hold Teddy back another year but just remember this the next time I mention being worried. But we do have some time before high school. Years. Maybe by then we can look into something private? No, Jesus, I watched Gossip Girl, private school isn’t any better.” 

Eleanor continued to look distraught but Trent moved to sit next to her and even kissed the side of her head.    
  
In the midst of the uncomfortable story, Devi couldn’t help but notice how Trent was taking care of Eleanor, it gave her pause. Eleanor and Trent had been together since high school and in this small moment, Devi understood why. It was a stark reminder that her friends really loved each other and Devi almost felt like she was intruding. 

Devi coughed and Trent and Eleanor seemed to remember she was there.    


“Okay so Paxton thought they were dating but she ignored him at school because he finds out later she has a boyfriend. She’s just sleeping with him because she wanted to. He really liked her. She was the only one he dated in high school except for Devi. He just messed around with other girls.”    
  
“And ever since, for okay, yes, valid reason, he has this ridiculously high bar about cheating. He turned off Grey’s Anatomy when George cheated on Callie with Izzie. He hates it,” Devi explained. “Which is fine! It’s fine to have that! But also it obviously was a really bad thing for me to say because it definitely made him more angry than if I’d just kicked him out solely for butting into my fight with Jordan.” 

“That’s fucked up,” Eleanor said, pressing a hand to her temple. “So yeah, I’m with Trent on this one, you shouldn’t have baited Paxton like that. Jesus.”

“I know! I admit it was a bad choice!” 

“You should apologize to him,” Eleanor added. “And we should get him into therapy. Has he been to therapy? Because fucking yikes!” 

Just then, the front door opened and Fabiola came in, dragging a wheeled carry-on suitcase behind her. All talk of Paxton’s previous fucked up freshman year was pushed back in favor of Fab. 

“I’m here and I’m ready to party!” Fabiola said as Devi and Eleanor came rushing over to hug her. “And by party, I mean sit around quietly so we don’t wake up kids and gossip.” 

All three women wrapped arms around each other and hugged. This was good. This felt like home. All these little pieces of her that felt like they were scattered around fell in place and maybe even just this little reunion could fix Devi’s unsettled feelings. 

Trent got Fab a glass of wine and within minutes the women were all comfy on the couch, Fabiola was even braiding Devi’s hair, while Eleanor was perusing the face masks, trying to decide which one she wanted.    
  
“Okay so back to the boyfriend you didn’t tell us about,” Eleanor said, looking directly at Devi. 

Fab, holding several strands of Devi’s hair, moved her head around so she could get a better look at Devi. “You have a boyfriend? Is it Paxton?”

“Why are you obsessed with me dating Paxton, Fab?” Devi asked, annoyed. 

Fabiola shrugged. “He’s cool and I like not having to make new friends.” 

“I’m not dating Paxton. It’s a guy from Boston. His name is Jordan.” 

“What does Jordan do?” Eleanor asked, her eyebrows raised. 

“Uhhhhh,” Devi paused, unsure. “Mortgages?”

“You don’t know what your boyfriend does?” Eleanor was gobsmacked. “How long have you been dating?”

Devi looked up at the ceiling, trying to remember. “Oh, okay, five months. Because my lease was up in April and then I just moved in with him because they raised my rent and-”   
  
“Devi!” Fab shouted. “You did what? You lived with this man and you don’t know what he does for money and you barely know how long you dated?”   
  
“I hate to be your mom, but you do have terrible taste in men.” Eleanor shook her head. “I know you don’t want to hear it, but maybe Paxton is right.”    
  
“Yeah,” Devi said, shaking her head. “I don’t want to hear that. Let’s move on, hmm? Fab, what’s happening with your love life?” She looked up at Fabiola who was still braiding. 

“It’s fine. I’m seeing somebody who works at Google. But not like the evil part of Google. It’s early you know, just fun stuff. She’s nice but her favorite Indiana Jones movie Crystal Skull so I don’t know how long it’s gonna go on.”    
  
“Isn’t that the one with Shia Labeouf?” Devi asked and Eleanor nodded. 

“Yes, it is. Fun fact. That dude is never sober. Another guy who needs therapy. But a good actor.” 

“God, Eleanor, that sounds glamorous,” Devi said. 

“It’s not, he threw up on my shoes and the poor wardrobe supervisor had a fit.” Eleanor put her elbows on her knees and rested her chin in her hands. “Devi, why didn’t you tell us about your boyfriend?”

Devi’s shoulders dropped and she whined. She didn’t want to talk about this. But she should have expected it. 

“I don’t know, it just didn’t seem important!” 

“So he’s not important to you?” Fab asked, moving to sit on the floor in front of Devi, finally done braiding her hair. 

“I work a lot! It was convenient! You know I like having someone to have sex with. It was easy.” 

“Why didn’t you break up with him?” Eleanor asked. “Before you left?”

She closed her eyes and scrunched up her face. If she admitted this to Eleanor, it would get to Trent and it would probably get to Paxton but Trent wasn’t in the room and maybe she wouldn’t tell him and these were her best friends so what the hell.   
  
“I tried.” 

Eleanor’s eyes widened and Fabiola laughed. 

“You tried? You weren’t successful?” Fab asked, delighted by the information. 

“He was sort of pathetic and I was trying to leave and I just,” Devi sighed. “I just gave up and said I’d try long distance to get out of the situation.” 

“That’s not getting out of the situation,” Eleanor said, moving her arms wide. “That’s making the situation worse. That’s a guy taking a red eye across the country and showing up at your house to have a big fight because you won’t answer the phone!” 

Fabiola’s jaw dropped. “Devi! You’re not answering his calls! That’s terrible!”    
  
Devi threw her head back and let out a whimper. 

“I know!” 

“You can’t just ghost someone from across the country!” Eleanor shook her head some more, giving Devi a judgemental mom face. 

“I need more wine. And food. Everything is stupid.” Devi stood up, aiming for the kitchen. 

“To be fair, you made it all stupid,” Eleanor added. “But I can see why you need more wine.” 

Fabiola met them in the kitchen, a dumb smile on her face. “I know this is all very serious but I’ve actually really missed a wild Devi disaster. It’s nice. Feels like the old days and I love you guys so much.” 

Devi rubbed her temple. “Thanks, I think.” 

Four glasses of wine later, they were removing their face masks and Trent was on the living room floor, trying to find something they could all agree on watching.    
  
“Let’s watch a Sharknado movie!” Fabiola shouted, tugging on Trent’s shoulder. 

“No, they’re too gory! Eleanor’s stomach is sensitive and she ate a lot of food. You’re all very close to puking anyways, I’m not cleaning that up.”    
  
“We’re comfortably tipsy, Trent!” Devi said, too loudly, raising her glass in the air. “Nobody is gonna puke!” 

Eleanor was on the floor with a throw pillow, half asleep, next to Trent.

“Oh,” Paxton said, coming into the living room, unsure of what he’d walked in on. “I forgot it was Thursday.” 

“Paxton!” Fabiola stood up, rushing to hug him. Devi pouted. Her friends could just hug Paxton like it was normal but Devi’s own hang ups wouldn’t allow for that. She had to remember why she was mad at him. Or he was mad at her. Which was it? Things were sort of fuzzy. 

“Hi Fab,” Paxton said, hugging her. “You guys look like you’re having fun.”    
  
“We are,” she said before tilting her head towards Devi. “Did you see Devi is here?” 

“Yeah, I’ve seen her a few times,” he indulged Fab. 

“We’re all so glad she’s back, aren’t you? I bet you’re most glad she’s back.” Fab smiled wide and Paxton laughed. He looked over Fab’s shoulder and made eye contact with Devi. It was like he was trying to talk to her again without actually saying anything. It was too much but Devi couldn’t look away. Finally, he gave Devi a soft smile and turned back to Fab. 

“Yeah, I am.” 

But something snapped in Devi. The combination of wine and the way she couldn’t just let it go, her skin was hot and she sat up straight. 

“Well stop trying to tell me what to do with my life then!” Devi shouted, startling even Eleanor out of her half sleep. Paxton’s brows lowered right before he rolled his eyes. 

“Give it a rest, Devi,” he said, irritated. 

“No, you give it a rest!” Devi stood up, wobbled a little, and decided sitting down was just as good of a place to make her point. “I’m gonna do what I want with  _ my _ life!” 

“So you’ve said, many times. It’s starting to sound like you’re trying to convince yourself of the fact!” Paxton shouted back. 

Trent, Eleanor, and Fabiola all looked uncomfortably back and forth between Paxton and Devi. 

“I’m sleeping!” a small voice came from the stairs. 

“Now you woke up the kids,” Paxton shouted at Devi who glared at him. 

Trent closed his eyes and took a cleansing breath before getting up to take care of the small child on the stairs. 

“Wait!” Emma said, just before Trent picked her up. “I can do four jumps on the trampoline!” 

“Yes, you can, and that is just as worthy of shouting to the whole house as whatever Paxton and Devi are shouting about,” Trent said, supportively to Emma. 

Paxton softened. “That’s so great, kid, you’re gonna be like your dad’s favorite Simone Biles in no time.”    
  
“Thanks!” Emma said before Trent took her upstairs. Eleanor’s hair was sticking up funny but she was awake, fully, now. 

“Are you two done or do I need to send you outside?” she said, her best mom voice making Devi feel small. 

“I’ve got to go anyways,” Paxton said, and before Devi could think of anything sharp to say, he was gone. 

“That did not go nearly as bad as it could have,” Fabiola offered, optimistically. 

\--

Someone was in the kitchen. Devi could hear the faucet running, she could hear spoons hitting bowls, and Trent was whispering while kids shouted back. He shushed them and Devi tried to ignore the noise. She pulled the blanket over her head but that wasn’t enough. 

Despite only drinking enough to get buzzed last night, her head hurt. Getting older meant that she really did not recover as quickly but also once everyone had gone to bed, Devi was still thinking about fighting with Paxton. She shouldn’t have shouted. She shouldn’t have engaged at all. She should have gone with her gut and hugged him like Fabiola did and just enjoyed her evening, maybe things would have gone differently and nobody would have to apologize.

Devi gave up her attempts to sleep when someone started crying about Cocoa Pebbles. 

“Sorry, Devi,” Trent said as she got up and came to sit at the kitchen table. “Coffee?”

“Pass. You guys got chocolate milk?” she asked the kids specifically and Teddy lit up. 

“Yes!” 

“Awesome. I’ll have that.” 

Teddy ran for the fridge, around Trent, almost knocking him over and brought the glass bottle to the table.    
  
“Damn, this is some fancy ass chocolate milk,” Devi said as it was placed in front of her. 

“Don’t swear in front of the kids, they’ll repeat it and you won’t be the one getting dirty looks at gymnastics,” Trent said, handing Devi a mug. 

Emma tugged on her brother’s sleeve and whispered (except children are incapable of whispering so Devi heard every mispronounced preschool word), “She yelled at Uncle Paxton.”    
  
Teddy’s jaw dropped and he looked at Devi harshly now, his little brows furrowed and a frown on his chubby face. 

“Why?”

Devi scrunched her own face up, unsure how to answer that. She looked at Trent who shook his head. 

“You explain it.” Trent went back to a mixing bowl on the counter. 

“We’re good. It was just....friendly yelling, we’re friends,” Devi tried. The kids looked more suspicious than they had before she lied. 

“Bullshit,” Teddy said and Trent threw his arms in the air. 

“Props for using it correctly but no, you can’t say it.”    
  
“I can’t swear but he can swear at me?” Devi asked, slightly impressed with the kid. 

“No, he can’t, go sit on the stairs, one minute, dude, we talked about this!” Trent pointed to the stairs and the five year old meandered over, very slowly to sit in his time out. 

“He used it right, shouldn’t he get like...less time for that?” Devi asked. 

“He’s gonna get sent home from kindergarten at this rate which is why I keep saying we should hold him back a year. He’s not ready.” Trent made his case but Devi rolled her eyes. 

“That kid is gonna kill it on the playground, you think anybody’s messing with him? Nah. He’s gonna run that place.” 

“Nobody is on my side on this,” Trent muttered to himself before turning back to Devi. “So my money was on Paxton apologizing first but I think you gotta do it now, after last night.” 

“I’m going to, I’m going to, just give me a minute to get my shit together. I mean, he did tell me  _ twice _ to break up with my boyfriend so yeah I let him have it but remember, he started it,” Devi said, hating how she sounded like one of the kids. 

“You didn’t tell anybody about the boyfriend, we couldn’t even warn him,” Trent replied. 

“Warn him? He needs to be warned? About me?” Devi asked, irritated. 

“He waited for you and you forgot he existed so yeah, he needed to be warned.” Trent looked at his watch. “You can come back to the table now, Teddy.” 

Teddy stood up from the stairs and came back to sit in front of Devi and glared at her. 

“Yelling isn’t a good way to share your feelings,” the five year old said, sternly. 

“Some of us didn’t have parents that taught us early how to properly share our feelings without yelling.” Devi shrugged her shoulders. “Consider yourself lucky. Besides, maybe it was Paxton that was the problem!” 

“Are you arguing with my five year old about this? Really?” Trent looked amused. 

Devi frowned. “Why’d he wait for me? I didn’t actually think he would! He’s perfect. How did he wait? How did he not find someone else?”

“Because he wanted you. To him, you’re the perfect one.” Trent put some bacon in a pan and it sizzled. 

Devi looked at the chocolate milk in her mug, hoping to see some answers there. She never expected Paxton to wait. At the wedding, she just assumed he was being nice. All those old feelings dredged up, it made the water murky. It was easy to just say they could try again when she was home. Of course she wanted to believe it, but it wasn’t real. 

“I’d have gone crazy if I waited,” Devi said, staring at the swirls in the milk. “How was I supposed to get through med school? Or god, internship counting down the days til I could come home and be back with him? I couldn’t have done it.” 

“That’s fair,” Trent said, putting a plate of bacon in front of her on the table. “But he did so maybe cut him some slack.”

Just as he finished, Eleanor came floating down the stairs. Her hair was pulled back and she was wearing a bright blue silk bathrobe. It was just as dramatic as Devi would expect from Eleanor but something about it made her seem almost reserved in it. 

“Oh my god, babe, sweetheart, lover, are you making french toast?” she asked Trent, leaning over the counter and taking her time to sniff the air just above the pan. 

“Yes, E, with the brioche you bought and said ‘please make french toast with this on Friday morning,’” he said, kissing her forehead. 

“I love you so much,” Eleanor said, standing on her tiptoes to give Trent a quick kiss. 

“Ew, get a room!” Devi stuck her tongue out and looked at Teddy for backup but the kid just stared at her confused. 

“You’re literally in our kitchen,” Trent told Devi. “I made you bacon.”

Devi picked up a piece and took a bite. It was good bacon.

The real issue was that Devi couldn’t help but be uncomfortable by her friends' affection. It had been years since Devi had been witness to anyone loving each other the way Eleanor and Trent loved each other. Her own parents loved each other that much but her dad had been gone 15 years by now. 

Devi chose to lean on that as the reason it made her uneasy. This was a dead dad thing. 

(It had nothing to do with the fact that Devi hadn’t felt that strongly for anyone since...well you can guess.)

\--

This wasn’t how she wanted to do this. She was in scrubs (she hated scrubs), the pizza took forever, her car door flung wide and hit Paxton’s truck. Everything about this was going terribly and she hadn’t even knocked on the door yet. 

Devi took a deep breath, rolled her shoulders (as best she could while holding the pizza), ran her tongue across her teeth, and prayed this wouldn’t go as badly as basically every other interaction since getting back. 

Paxton opened the door shirtless. 

That was rude. 

“You answer the door half naked for everyone or just me?” Devi asked, trying to keep her eyes on his face and not wandering. Didn’t metabolism fuck up after 30? Why did he still look like that? 

“I saw you through the peephole.” He leaned on the edge of the door and just waited. She bit her lip, tipped her head one way and then the other, trying to get up the courage to just say it. Paxton raised an eyebrow at her and the challenge was enough to spur her on. 

“I thought I’d try your way, you know, just showing up on your doorstep.”    
  
Paxton still stood there, waiting for her to go on. “That only works if you do the actual apology.” 

Devi resisted the urge to roll her eyes. “I’m sorry.” 

She didn’t even have to explain. He was already opening the door and taking the pizza. 

“No, wait, let me finish,” she said, annoyed that he made it so easy. 

“Finish in here, it’s windy,” he said, matching her annoyance.

“Well don’t answer the door shirtless!” Devi pressed. 

“I didn’t think you’d take so long apologizing or I would have put a shirt on.” Paxton lifted the lid of the pizza box. “Is this combination?”

“With no green peppers,” Devi said, following him into the apartment. 

“Thanks for remembering,” he said, putting the pizza on the small dining table and walking to the fridge. 

His apartment was covered in brightly colored paper, fish cut outs, bulletin board liners, and bins in yellow, blue, and red. 

“You want a beer?” he asked from the fridge. 

“Just water, I’m actually on lunch.” She sat down at the table and opened the box, taking a slice from it as he put a bottle of water in front of her and sat down. “What’s all this shit?”

“Setting up my classroom next week,” he said, taking a slice and handing her a paper towel. “Were you gonna finish apologizing or…”

Devi looked back at him, shaking her head to clear it. “Right. I, uh,” she sighed. “You understand why I had to come home so surely you can understand that I’m gonna try this bullshit long distance thing with my boyfriend.” 

“Bullshit thing?” He gave her a look but it was lost because he also dropped a pepperoni from his pizza on his bare chest. “Shit,” he muttered, picking up the topping and grabbing for a paper towel to wipe his chest. 

Devi stared, mesmerized. But she caught herself before Paxton noticed, and looked at the fridge. There was a note on it that said “Dad 4:30, Wednesday,” a Disneyland magnet, a bill stub, and a take out menu from some Chinese place. 

“Yeah, bullshit thing. I mean, long distance. I’m gonna try it. I owe him that.” Going on with her explanation was easier than looking at Paxton wipe pizza grease off his perfectly toned pec. The point was to be friends. She could be friendly. Not stare. 

“At the risk of starting another fight-”   
  
“Don’t,” Devi cut him off, looking back at him. “Please.” 

“You don’t owe him anything,” he finished anyways, causing Devi to roll her eyes. 

She put her pizza slice down and took a drink of water so she didn’t come out swinging. 

“That’s none of your business.” 

He held her eye contact for too long, and tilted his head just a little, like he was deciding if he wanted to push it, before he looked away and nodded.    
  
“I’m sorry I expected you to rearrange your life for me, that was uncalled for.” 

Devi gave him a small smile. That was enough. 

“I missed you,” she admitted but then regretted it. “I missed being your friend. So we can do that, right? We can be friends?”

Paxton nodded. “Yeah, I missed you too.” 

His phone dinged and he reached for it quickly and Devi was relieved. She didn’t want to have to talk about the missing part. They missed each other. They said it. No need to go into why or share feelings further. It was said and done. 

Devi picked at the tag in the scratchy scrubs. 

“What’s wrong with your collar?” he asked after a quick glance at his phone.    
  


“I hate scrubs,” Devi whined.

“Let me cut the tag out.” He stood up and grabbed some scissors from the coffee table and walked around her. “If you hate them, why are you wearing them?”

Devi pulled her hair around to her side, giving him access to where the tag was just inside the collar. She tried to ignore the way his fingertips brushed across her skin. She wanted to be his friend. This was friendly. He was helping. Her skin was fine. She could ignore it. 

“A patient threw up on me,” she explained. “One of my favorite dresses, god, why did I ever buy anything that isn’t machine washable?”

“Ah,” his voice was low and she felt his breath on her ear as he bent down to see better. “Use the dry cleaner’s on Harris Street. They’re good.” 

Devi closed her eyes, and shrugged to one side, giving him way more access to her neck than he needed. He had already cut the tag out so why was she doing that? She snapped out of it, and straightened herself up, trying to play it off. Friends. They were friends. 

He walked around her, sat back down, and took a bite of his pizza. Why wasn’t he wearing a shirt again? Was it warm in this apartment?   
  
“How does a doctor not like scrubs?”

“I’m not a surgeon,” Devi said, frowning. “And I like being able to look cute at work. I like looking cute all the time.” 

Paxton looked her up and down and Devi gulped, realizing what she’d just opened the door for. “You look cute.” 

“You always think I look cute.” Devi looked away as soon as she said it. It was meant to be an insult but it didn’t come out like that and when she looked back up at him she could tell he was holding back a smile. Better change the subject. “So back at school this week?”

He leaned back on his chair a little and took a swig of his beer. 

“Yeah, school starts week after.” 

“Is your classroom water themed?” Devi asked, taking in the fish, the blue paper, a bright red cutout of a buoy. “Is that...Nemo?”

“Yes,” he said, putting his chair back down on the floor and leaning over to grab a fish cut out. It was Dory. “This shit kills with the second grade set.” 

Devi laughed. “I bet it does. I suppose you teach math with swim relay word problems?”

“I don’t know how else I’m supposed to teach it?” Again, leaning over to reach for another cut out, this time, a swimmer on a chart that had several simple math facts. 

She put a hand on her temple and looked at him. “Predictable.” 

“Nah, you just know me.” 

Ugh. There he went again. Did she? It had been forever. Years. A decade. And surely he’d changed? A little? He couldn’t possibly be exactly the same. For one thing, some of his old insecurities, about not being a good student, about not being good enough for her, those didn’t seem to be an issue anymore. He was proud of his career and he hadn’t been shy at all about wanting her. But there was a hesitation that she must have brought out. Maybe it was her that was too different. Maybe she was the problem. 

“Hey,” she looked at him, a wide smile on her face, trying to move again from uncomfortable topics. “Do you have to work all next week? I’m off Tuesday and Wednesday.” 

“I could do something Tuesday,” he said, unfazed. 

“Let’s go to Disneyland.” 

His face lit up like she knew it would. Her phone dinged and she saw it was the ER. Break over. 

“Text me what time you’re gonna pick me up, I know you won’t settle for anything later than whatever time the park opens so just give me some notice, okay?” She stood up and grabbed her phone and her purse. 

“Thanks for the pizza,” he said as he stood up to walk her out. 

“This front door apology thing works pretty good.” 

“Stealing all my best moves, what am I gonna do now?” he asked, shaking his head, and trying not to smile at her. 

“You’ll need new moves. Good luck with that.” Devi winked at him and headed out the door.    
  
Maybe now she’d be able to sleep better. 

Or maybe she’d keep thinking about the way his fingertips felt against the skin of her neck. 

Friends did that, right?


	5. Chapter 5

Things were comfortable. 

Devi apologized. Paxton apologized. They could be friends. 

Paxton pushed the door open to his classroom with his shoulder and put down the milk crate full of supplies. He spent all weekend thinking about Devi but they were friends so it was fine. They were going to Disneyland tomorrow and he texted to let her know he was picking her up at 8AM sharp. He asked what she wanted to do while there and she’d been vague which was annoying. He wanted to make a plan for the day and she wasn’t helping.

But they’d been texting back and forth since then, so as he was unloading classroom materials, he was thinking about Devi. His friend. His very cute friend with too much attitude and nice legs and a big mouth. Soft lips. And her eyelashes-

“Mr. Hall-Yoshida!” A plump woman with greying hair flagged him down from the hall. 

‘What’s up, Mrs. Johnson?” She was the registration secretary and she’d been at the school almost since Paxton was in elementary school himself. 

“We’re trying to move the copy machine but a wheel broke off so it won’t slide, I know you can move it by yourself and you know I can’t,” Mrs. Johnson explained, gesturing for him to follow her. 

He walked into the office through the back entrance and went directly to the copy machine. The elderly woman told him where she wanted it, just a foot over, and he moved it easily. 

“You’re the best, thank you,” she said, patting him on the back. “Oh, did you meet our new attendance secretary?” 

Paxton shook his head. “I’m gonna head back to my car, I’ll meet them later, I left the door open on my truck since I was unloading.” He started towards the door but Mrs. Johnson followed him. 

“You’re passing the desk on your way out.” Mrs. Johnson stopped at the front desk as he kept walking. “Kayla, this is Mr. Hall-Yoshida, he’s the star second grade teacher.”    
  
“You’re just saying that because you are happy you don’t have to teach second grade,” he corrected Mrs. Johnson, but gave Kayla a tightlipped smile.    
  
“So modest!” Mrs. Johnson clapped her hands together. 

Paxton nodded and offered his hand to Kayla, a dark skinned woman with braids who looked younger than him by at least five years.

“Nice to meet you,” Kayla said, her eyes wide and her smile soft. 

“He also started and coaches the fourth and fifth grade swim team!” Mrs. Johnson provided. 

Kayla tilted her head to the side, like she was connecting dots. “Paxton Hall-Yoshida?” 

He nodded. She was still staring at him with hazy eyes. Paxton knew that look. 

“You swam at Sherman Oaks High?” 

“Yeah. Way back when.” It was time to extricate himself from whatever this was about to be. He turned to try and go. 

“I think my brother went to school with you.”   
  
He turned back to her, putting on a fake smile, trying not to be rude. “Who’s your brother?”

“Randall? Randall Curtis?” 

Paxton took a second to think before shaking his head. “Sorry, I don’t remember him. But to be fair, I really only remember like five people from high school.” 

“Well, you were pretty popular back then, hm? I understand.” She looked embarrassed. 

“It’s been a long time and my memory is terrible,” he tried to cover. “Besides my best friend and his wife who was my high school girlfriend’s best friend, I just don’t think about those people anymore. Sorry.” 

“Why’re you talking about me?” Trent asked, coming up behind Paxton, kids in tow. 

Paxton rolled his eyes. “This is Kayla, she said her brother went to school with us, Randall Curtis?”

Teddy offered a fist to Paxton and he bumped it. 

“Doesn’t ring a bell,” Trent said, pulling a folder out of the backpack he had with him. “I’m here to register Teddy for kindergarten.” 

“Good,” Paxton said and this time Trent rolled his eyes. “He’s gonna do great.” He turned to Teddy again. “You got this, dude.”    


“Eleanor said I had to, but whatever,” Trent looked between the two women standing at the desk in front of them and Paxton gestured to the older woman. 

“Mrs. Johnson’s got all the stuff you need.” He looked down at Teddy. “Come help me get this stuff out of my truck, Teddy. Your dad has to fill out like eight million forms.” 

“I can help too,” Kayla offered but Paxton waved her off. 

“We got it,” he said walking out the door. 

Later, back in Paxton’s classroom, Trent was filling out forms at a kid sized table while Paxton moved tiny desks into formations just like he wanted while the kids pulled every book out of his book box. 

“You should ask that Kayla out,” Trent said, looking up as he put one finished form behind the stack he was working on. 

“Pass,” he said, standing back to look at the classroom set up as it was, hands on his hips. 

“Can’t date Devi, might as well date her.”    
  
“I don’t want to date her, I just met her.” Paxton shifted a cluster of desks in front of him to the right. “Devi apologized anyway.” 

“Did she break up with her boyfriend?” 

“No,” Paxton answered, perturbed. “But we’re going to…” he looked at the kids in the back and lowered his voice, “Disneyland tomorrow.” 

“So another date? You’re dating Devi.” Trent leaned back in the tiny kids chair and almost lost his balance, before slamming the legs back on the floor and hitting his knees on the table. 

“We’re hanging out. We’re friends.” But it had occurred to Paxton that them going to Disneyland together certainly felt like a date. Especially since the last time they’d been there together, they were dating. They used to go all the time. 

His family always had annual passes and Devi’s parents had never taken her. Her mom thought it was a waste of money, so of course, when they dated, Devi jumped at every chance to go with his family. 

“Yeah, okay, if she wanted to go to Disneyland just to go, she could have asked Eleanor. We have kids, it’s a great excuse.” Trent didn’t look up from his forms but Paxton could see him smirking. 

“We used to do it all the time, she knew I’d have a pass,” he said, trying to avoid the obvious conclusion that this was very much like a date. 

Trent nodded, exaggerated, his face smug. “If she’s not answering her boyfriend’s calls but she’s going to Disneyland with you…”

Paxton sighed, irritated. “We’re friends. Just friends.” 

Trent kept quiet but Paxton couldn't stop thinking about it. He decided if there was nothing else, he could be friends with Devi. He wanted to be friends with her. He’d fucked up back in college and they stopped talking and that was the thing he regretted. So friends. He was gonna be friends with her. 

\--

“What are you wearing?” he asked Devi when she opened her front door. 

“Clothes,” she said, looking down at her outfit, confused. 

“We’re going to Disneyland,” he said like his point was obvious but Devi was still confused. 

“I have comfortable shoes,” she said, using her foot to bring them closer to the door. 

Paxton gestured to his sweatshirt with a classic Mickey head front and center. 

“You can’t embarrass me at the House of Mouse, you’re not even wearing anything Disney,” he said as she put on her shoes and pulled the door closed behind her. 

They walked towards the truck. 

“I know my mom bought you at least six shirts back in high school, you’re telling me you don’t own anything Disney? To wear?”

Devi laughed, walking around the truck and getting in as he did the same. “As if I could wear a shirt from high school.”    
  
Paxton made a face. “I can wear stuff from high school.”

“First of all, that’s bullshit,” she said, putting on her seatbelt, before pushing on his shoulder. “Your shoulders are like five inches broader than when you were 17.” 

“Yours aren’t,” he said, his brows furrowed. 

“My boobs would not fit in a size small shirt from when I was 16.” She gestured to her chest and try as he might, he couldn’t avoid looking. 

“Your boobs got bigger?” he couldn’t help but ask. 

“Eyes up here,” Devi said, pointing to her face, a sly smile there. “They didn’t but I can now buy myself very expensive push up bras so…” She laughed. 

He looked away and laughed too, starting the car. “I never complained about your boobs.” 

“You never complained about anything,” she said, rolling her eyes. But like when she said he always thought she was cute, it was meant to be an insult that she accidentally delivered softly. 

“Sorry,” he said, facetiously. 

Devi huffed. “Oh shut up!” 

Paxton remembered what started the conversation and as he came to a stop at a light, he dug around behind him and produced a black ball cap with Sleeping Beauty’s castle on it. 

“Here.” He handed it to her. “Wear this so you’ll actually look like you’re going to Disneyland.” 

Devi took it, glared at him for a second, before she put it on her head, pulling her ponytail through the back. 

“Happy?”

“Yes.” 

Paxton picked her up early because he knew she’d want to stop at Starbucks in Downtown Disney. They parked and walked with all the other early risers, coming out to Disney on a summer Tuesday in August. It wasn’t hot yet, thank goodness, and there weren’t too many people. 

“I just ordered on my phone,” she said, rolling the sleeves on her cardigan up a little. He pulled his phone out to order his drink but she stopped him with a hand on his arm. “I got yours, don’t worry.” 

Oh. She remembered his pizza order and his drink order. This was the Devi that kept telling him they didn’t know each other but then she did that. He tried not to think about it too much. 

They picked up their drinks and headed to the gate. They were there early enough that they were in the front and Paxton was happy to ignore whatever date feelings he was having about this and just move his shoulders back and forth to the cheesy Disney music blasting over the loudspeakers as they waited for the park to open. 

“You’re such a nerd,” Devi said. “Dancing.” 

“You could have asked Eleanor to take you to Disneyland,” he replied, mildly annoyed. 

“God, and go with her kids? What a nightmare.” Devi made a oops face when a mom with kids next to them glared at her. “Besides, you’re the expert.” 

“You never told me what you want to ride.” He pulled out his phone and looked at the Disneyland app. “Park opens in five minutes and I don’t even know where we should go first.”   
  
“You pick. Don’t you usually start in Fantasyland and work your way up?”

The line started to move as the cast members started letting people in and a rowdy show with some characters started in front of them. 

“Yeah, but don’t you have favorites?”    
  
“You tell me my favorites, I haven’t been in over a decade!” She laughed as he considered. 

“The last time you really loved the Matterhorn but fuck that, we’ll need a chiropracter after that. Trust me, we’re too old for it.” 

She laughed again before taking a sip of her drink. “Okay hm, oh! I love that creepy ass Snow White ride!” 

“Oh yeah,” he said, remembering the time his parents made fun of them for making out through most of it. “We’ll start there. And wait, you threw up after Roger Rabbit.” 

“I almost threw up  _ on  _ Roger Rabbit,” Devi corrected him. “That ride is a trip.”

They knocked out most of Fantasyland and rode Indiana Jones before lunch and then Devi started to whine about food. 

“So the real reason you wanted to come was food?” Paxton asked as she stood at a cart waiting for her Mickey pretzel. 

“Yes, all the Mickey shaped food. Some not Mickey shaped food. Anything Minnie or princess shaped is acceptable as well,” she said, taking the pretzel and handing him a churro. 

They wandered around Tomorrowland before their Fastpass for Space Mountain.    
  
“This one or this one?” Devi held up two long sleeve, oversized shirts. Paxton tugged on the hem of the teal one. 

“You look better in this color,” he said as she crinkled up her face. 

“I look good in every color.” 

“I didn’t say you looked bad in the other one,” Paxton said, before putting a pair of Mickey ears on his head. “Are you gonna get ears?”

“Why? I have a perfectly good hat.” Devi pointed at that hat he gave her this morning. 

“Uh, that’s Becca’s. She’s gonna notice it’s missing.” 

“It was in your car,” Devi said, moving to the cash register. “But fine, I won’t steal her hat.”   
  
“But you would steal  _ my _ hat?” Paxton asked, raising a brow. 

“Yeah, of course.” She said it like it was obvious. 

The cast member started to ring up Devi’s shirts and Paxton pulled out his wallet. 

“Whoa, you’re not buying my shirts.”    
  
“I’m not, I’m getting my annual pass out. I get a discount,” he said, showing the cast member his card. 

“Oh shit, nice.” 

“You could get one yourself you know, we could go to Disneyland all the time,” he said, putting his card back in his wallet as Devi took the bag from the counter. 

Devi’s jaw dropped. “I live here!” 

Paxton laughed. “Yeah, you live here.” 

“I could get a pass!” Devi smiled wide. “Hell yeah, I’m getting a pass! Wait, if you’re in school, we can’t go on the weekdays and you hate going on weekends.”    
  
“Too many people on the weekends.” He dodged a cast member selling balloons and tugged Devi’s arm so she missed the cast member too. “But we could go after school, whenever your days off are.”    
  
“You’d come to Disneyland in the middle of the day? Instead of at opening? That sounds fake. You only want to come at opening.”    
  
“It’s called rope drop,” he corrected her. “And I can go at different times. I’m not militant about it.”    
  
Devi laughed. “Yes, you are.”

Paxton rolled his eyes at her but she was right. He did prefer going at rope drop. You got more done. But he would go later for her.    


“I’d rather go on a weekday afternoon than a weekend at any time so yeah, I would go after school if you wanted.”    
  
She stopped to avoid someone taking a picture in front of her. Paxton got three steps ahead of her but stopped to look back at her. She had this glossy look in her eyes, he didn’t know what it meant.    
  
“Okay,” she said, suddenly. “I’m getting a pass and we can go after school on my days off.”    
  
Paxton nodded. “Yeah, that’s what I said.” 

“Great,” she said, and for the first time since she was home, she gave him that big smile. The one that showed all her teeth. No holding back, her entire face lit up. “Now let’s go ride Space Mountain!” 

By the time the sun was setting, they’d been on most of the rides and Paxton asked Devi if she wanted to stay for the fireworks. 

“Not tonight, let’s get some Dole Whip and go home. You’ve got work tomorrow, yeah?” She linked arms with him and pressed in close, whether from the sea of people congregating to get a good view for the fireworks or from the evening chill that started to blow around them, he wasn’t sure. But he wasn’t complaining. 

“You’re cold and you want Dole Whip?” But he was already walking towards the stand that sold the frozen pineapple soft serve. 

“When have I ever not wanted Dole Whip?” she asked, incredulous. 

But his phone rang. “I need to take this, can you get the Dole Whip, I’ll be right here?”

Devi nodded and walked off, Paxton tried not to shiver at the loss of her being right next to him with all her body heat. He answered the phone and was done in three minutes so headed towards Devi at the Tiki Juice Bar where she was waiting for the Dole Whip she ordered.    
  
“Here you go, ma’am,” he heard the girl say as she handed Devi the Dole Whips in their brightly colored cups. He saw Devi reach for spoons and napkins and then saw her turn and glare at a large man behind her. “I’m sorry sir, the machine just needs to be refilled. We’ll get yours in a moment.”    
  
“If this bitch who doesn’t even have kids hadn’t ordered those, I could be giving them to my kids!” The man was shouting and way too close to Devi for Paxton’s liking.

Before he even thought, he picked up his pace and moved in between Devi and the man. “Sir, why don’t you calm down. The cast member said she’d have yours in a second.” Paxton stood up taller but Devi was tugging on his arm. 

“Paxton, let’s go,” she said, but the man glared down at him and Paxton didn’t intend on going anywhere. 

“Your girlfriend stole my kids’ ice cream!” Paxton could smell the man’s terrible breath as he pushed into his space. People around them were starting to stare.

“It’s actually non dairy and you’re ruining the magic for everyone around you,” Paxton raised his voice a little more, feeling his skin heat. This guy wasn’t gonna quit. 

“Paxton!” Devi shouted from behind him. He turned to look at her and as he turned back to the man, he saw too late that the man’s fist was heading right for Paxton’s jaw. It happened quickly and before Paxton could even raise an arm to return the punch, several security guards came rushing to put themselves between the two men. 

Devi dropped the Dole Whips she was holding at some point, probably when he got hit, and had moved around in front of him, she took his face in her hands to examine his chin. Her eyes were wide and she looked concerned.    
  
“What the fuck is wrong with you,” she muttered. It looked like concern but her words didn’t seem to match her worried face. 

“Sir, we need to fill out some paperwork,” one of the security guys said to Paxton but Devi swatted him away.    
  
“I’m a doctor and i’m trying to decide if he needs medical attention, give me some space!” 

“It’s just a punch, Devi, I’m fine,” Paxton said, embarrassed at the thought that this might require medical care at all. The guy was big but not that big.    
  
People were chattering on loudly, staring, shouting, so many people, all around them until a firework went off, signalling the beginning of the show. But the loud bangs of exploding fireworks weren’t any better. Paxton’s head started to throb.    
  
Paxton couldn’t really be sure how he ended up in the first aid office closest to the front of the park. It was a blur. But Devi handled telling the security people what happened and then they escorted them out of the park with apologies.    
  
“You’re too noble for your own good, you idiot,” Devi said, holding onto his arm as she walked him back to his car. The breeze hitting his face brought him back to feeling like a normal human being at least. 

“I didn’t think the guy would hit me,” Paxton said, matching Devi’s scolding. “I was defending you!”    
  
“I’m an adult. I don’t need to be rescued anymore, Paxton.” But her arm tightened around his. That was unexpected. 

“He called you a bitch, and he was ruining the magic for everyone. He was so mean to that poor girl at the counter,” Paxton argued. “How did your temper not flare at that?”

“Oh, it flared, but I’ve learned to not come at men much larger than me, he punched you, he’d have killed me.” 

“No, he wouldn’t have.”    
  
“I don’t know that, and you know, being a woman, it’s just not a good idea for me to have tried my luck with that one today, you feel?” They walked onto the parking garage escalator and Devi used her free hand to reach for his chin. “It’s gonna be a nasty bruise.” 

“So now you’re just mad at me? I get the temper?” 

Her eyes narrowed and she dropped her hand from his chin. “You always do this.”    
  
“Always?”

“Yeah, or did you forget the end of my freshman year at Princeton?”

Paxton cringed. He closed his eyes and then carefully opened one to look at her. “I remember.” 

“You know it’s almost impossible to file a complaint with the Title IX office for sexual harassment after your ex-boyfriend flies across the country to throw a TA up against a wall.” Devi stepped off the escalator and tugged Paxton by the arm towards the Jeep.    


“That’s stupid, you should have been able to file the complaint,” he said, feeling his skin heat again at the injustice of it all.    
  
“Of course it’s stupid, but that’s how it is. And you wouldn’t even apologize to me! You never even called me to tell me you got home safe!”    
  
Devi reached into his front pocket, causing Paxton to jump, and took his car keys out. She put him in the passenger side and walked around to the driver’s side of the car. He probably shouldn’t drive after being almost knocked out by a large man at Disneyland so he didn’t fight her. 

“I didn’t think you wanted to talk to me, actually, you said specifically, ‘I never want to talk to you again!’ Those exact words. Burned into my memory!” Paxton hated even thinking about it but he remembered all too well. 

“I was angry, of course I said that,” Devi said as she backed the Jeep out of the parking space. “You know I say all kinds of shit when I’m angry. I didn’t mean don’t talk to me for the next three years!” 

Neither of them said anything for a while. Paxton watched the street lights on the freeway until Devi hit the Sherman Oaks exit. He wanted to tell her that he regretted what he’d done back then. He wanted to apologize. But it felt like the time for that had already passed. 

“I can’t help it,” he whispered finally. “I’m just trying to make sure the people I love are safe. It’s not like I’m starting fights with randos. I’m stepping in when things are bad.” 

“And when I want you to step in, I’ll ask for it,” she said, looking over at him. “And you don’t love me anymore so just, I don’t know, remove me from that list of people. You didn’t need to get punched in the face today because of me.”    
  
Did she feel guilty? Was that soft voice because she felt bad about it? What did that mean? But more pressing was her statement about how he felt about her. He hadn’t meant to  _ say _ people he loved but it was what he meant. He did love her. Still. But that wasn’t gonna fly at the moment. 

“I meant before, I meant that I loved you before,” he lied. 

“Right.” It didn’t sound like she believed him. She pulled up to her house and turned the car off. “You okay to drive yourself home from here? Or should I drive over to yours and get an Uber?”

“I’m not at all fuzzy and my head barely hurts now, Doc, I can drive myself from here.” 

  
  


\--

Mariah Carey was blasting from his classroom but it was fine. The teachers he shared walls with had finished their classroom set up and were already gone for the day. So it was no big deal for Paxton and his mom to be singing  _ Emotion  _ at the top of their lungs while they did bulletin boards. 

Lindsey Hall-Yoshida was a die hard Mariah Carey fan. Through high school and college she saw Mariah perform five times. The first time she went to a Mariah Carey concert, she got her tickets from winning a radio contest where you had to be the fifth caller and then answer a trivia question. Paxton’s mom once forgot his first word, but she had never forgotten the set list of a Mariah Carey concert or album. (It was fine, she had his first word written down in his baby book. It was “go.”  _ The Emancipation of Mimi _ however was etched in her brain.) 

“I thought I’d have a hard time finding your classroom because the woman at the front office didn’t have stellar directions but it turns out, I just needed to follow the sound of  _ Dreamlover _ as it blasted down the hall,” Devi said as she walked in. 

Paxton didn’t expect her but before he could do anything, his mom was running to hug Devi. Must be nice. Sure, he could hug Devi too, but after last night, he didn’t think it was a good idea. 

“I’m so glad you’re back, Devi,” his mom said, pulling back and smiling wide. “You’re more beautiful than the last time I saw you, when was that? Trent and Eleanor’s wedding, right?”

Devi nodded. “Thank you, but I’m really the same.”    
  
(Except when Paxton suggested that they were the same people. Then she was staunchly demanding that he recognize she had changed.) 

“And you’re working in the Emergency Room? I’m so glad you ran into Paxton there. I felt so bad about his head when he was putting those shelves in!” She turned to look at him. “I can’t even tell that just two weeks ago he had a huge gash on his head. You’re very competent at your job I see. We always knew you would be though.” 

“It was really nothing,” Devi said, looking at Paxton for half a second then back to his mom. “Thought I should pop in today and check on his face.”    
  
“God, I can’t believe what happened at Disneyland.” Mrs. H-Y covered her mouth. “Thank goodness you were there with him! And by the way, I called someone I know that works over at the park and they’re going to credit you an extra park admission. I can’t believe they didn’t do anything like that last night. Usually they’re very good about that sort of thing.”    
  
Paxton busied himself with a pointless stacking of some folders. He didn’t want to talk about last night and he really didn’t want to focus on his mom calling someone she knew to get them some kind of better treatment. He hated when she did that. 

“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you,” he heard Devi tell her. 

An alarm from Lindsey’s phone went off and Paxton looked up at her and then at the clock over the door.    
  
“I’ve got to go, but you’re here to help now, right?” She picked up her purse and Devi nodded and smiled. “I was working on the sight words bulletin board over there. And yes, check his face to make sure it’s okay. It’s already turning sort of purple.” 

“Bye Mom, call me after?” Paxton waved as his mom ran out. 

“I’ll call after,” she tossed behind her. 

And then he was alone with Devi. She folded her arms across her chest and looked around the classroom. “This stuff looks way better on the walls than it did all over your apartment.”   
  
“Thanks, I think?” He turned back to the bulletin board he’d been working on but Devi was next to him before he could get back to it. Paxton glanced at her quickly, she was wearing her new teal Disneyland shirt from yesterday. The color did look really good on her. He tried to pretend he was concentrating on the board in front of him, picking some yellow seahorse cut outs. She took them from his hand, he tried to ignore the way her fingers brushed his. 

“Don’t put them there,” she said, moving them higher and to the right. “This looks better.” 

“Your board is over there,” he said, tilting his head to the board his mom worked on. For some reason, he couldn’t look directly at her. It was stupid. 

Instead of moving to her board though, she turned and reached for his chin again. Paxton cringed, it was sore. Devi lightened the pressure on his face, but he had to look at her now and he didn’t really want to do that. 

“It’s not too swollen, so that’s good,” she said just before worrying her lip between her teeth. She was very close. If he weren’t her friend, a light breeze could have pushed him into her in a less friendly way. A romantic way. “Did you put ice on it last night?”

“Of course, just like you told me to.” Paxton thought the least he could do was to text when he got home and let her know he wasn’t dead on the side of the road somewhere. Devi followed up with a list of instructions like icing his face, Ibuprofen, and lots of water. It was patronizing but he knew it was more about her being worried so he let it slide. 

“Noble idiot,” Devi whispered, her hand and eyes still on his chin. Paxton felt his body respond to her voice and proximity and wasn’t exactly sure what he wanted to happen next. If she didn’t have a boyfriend still, he was very clear on what he would have done.   
  
Someone knocked on the open door to the classroom and Devi jumped back and looked at her feet, he heard her take a deep breath and took the smallest amount of delight knowing he wasn’t the only one flustered by how close she had been. 

“I have your class list,” Kayla, the new attendance secretary, said from the door. 

Paxton frowned. “I got the email.”    
  
“I was, I was just,” Kayla tripped over her words. “Just giving everyone a hard copy! Sorry to interrupt.” 

“It’s fine,” Paxton said, shrugging. “Wait, Devi.”    
  
She seemed to have put herself back together and was smiling normally now, looking attentively. “Yes?”

“Did you know Kayla’s brother? He went to school with us. What was his name?” he asked Kayla again.    
  
“Randall Curtis,” Kayla answered eagerly. 

Devi’s face lit up with recognition. “One hell of a trombone player, yeah I remember him!” 

A band geek. No wonder he and Trent didn’t remember him. 

Kayla looked relieved that finally someone knew what she was talking about. 

“A good kisser, I would assume,” Devi said, winking at Kayla. 

“What? You kissed her brother? When?” Paxton was suddenly very jealous about something that would have happened over 10 years ago. 

“No,” Devi shook her head. “Horn players are good kissers. It’s a band joke.” 

“Oh.” Paxton frowned and felt stupid. 

“Were you just retroactively jealous of someone we went to school with?” Devi asked, a smirk firmly on her face. She looked really cute and Paxton was mad about it. 

“No,” he lied, and tried to laugh it off. Devi didn’t buy it. Her smile got wider and she reached for his chin again, putting just a little too much pressure again. “Ow!” 

“I can’t believe you were just jealous. That’s hysterical.” Devi’s fingers lightened up again but Paxton couldn’t even glare at her. Something was shifting and he wanted to know more.

Kayla cleared her throat from the door and Paxton took a step away from Devi. He took the paper from Kayla and then waited for her to leave. “See you tomorrow.” 

She gave a half wave to Devi and turned to leave. 

“You should ask her out,” Devi said, Kayla barely out of earshot. Now he could muster a glare for her. 

“I don’t date people I work with,” he snapped. Nothing was shifting. He was imagining it. 

His phone dinged as Devi went on, “She’s got that enamored by Paxton Hall-Yoshida face.” 

“You would know the face very well, you had it for a long time,” he said, checking his phone and seeing it wasn’t anything important. 

“Was that your mom?” Devi asked, her chin pointing to his phone. 

“No,” he answered, but Devi looked concerned now. 

“What’s going on with your dad, Paxton?”

Paxton looked at her seriously now. “What? Nothing.”

It was a lie. 

“You’ve been crazy tied to your phone lately.” Devi lifted her hand and pushed down a finger. “Your mom called last night when we were at Disneyland and you had to take it.” She ticked another finger down. “There’s a sticky note on your fridge that says ‘Dad, Wednesday 4:30’ which was today and I assume the appointment your mom left for.” Another finger down. “You were putting up shelves in the bathroom for your mom instead of your dad. I’d mention the lawn mowing but you’ve been doing that for too long, I don’t think it’s related.” 

Paxton sat down on one of the desks and sighed. “You didn’t used to be that observant.” 

“See, I have changed,” she teased but it was hollow and sounded like she was desperately trying to lighten what she’d just laid out. She knew the gravity of it. 

“He uh, he started to lose feeling in his arms, couple of months ago, they thought he was having a heart attack or a stroke but it’s not that.” Paxton tried not to think back to that first drive to the hospital. “They aren’t sure if it’s MS or ALS, could even be Parkinsons. Turns out something like this takes months to diagnose.” 

“Yeah, three to six easy. Maybe longer.” Devi sat down next to him and touched his knee. Mariah crooned Butterfly and Paxton wished he’d turned off the music before. “You should have told me. Who is his neurologist? Dr. Green is not good. You gotta have him seeing-”   
  
“Devi, my mom got most of the recommendations from your mom, I’m sure his doctors are good.” This is one reason he didn’t tell her. She was already in problem solving mode. 

“My mom knows?” Hurt flashed across Devi’s face but Paxton shook his head. 

“Nobody knows, my mom asked without saying anything, you know, lying about some friend to get the names.” 

“Why didn’t you say anything? The whole reason I came home was my mom’s health. You should have said something. I get it.” Devi looked at him, her eyes full of pity. That was another reason he hadn’t said anything. 

Paxton scratched at his neck, buying time to figure out how to respond. Being honest last night worked mostly well in that it made the fight shorter, less pointed, but there was that slip about him loving her. He had to choose what he said to be in that in between area where honesty was good but too honest, too direct, made her uncomfortable. 

“You’re the only person I know who has lost a parent.”    
  
Devi sighed. “My dad dropped dead. It’s not the same thing as what you’re going through with your dad.” Her hand tightened on his knee and she looked away. “You’re going to watch your dad deteriorate over months and years. Watching my dad die will look pretty tame comparatively. It was fast at least.”

Paxton scrubbed at his eye and swallowed past the lump in his throat. “That wasn’t helpful, Devi.” 

“I know.” She inched closer to him, putting her arm around his back and resting her chin on his shoulder. “I’m sorry.” 

He put his hand over hers on his knee and squeezed.

“What do you need?” she asked, her voice hitched and it was almost too much for him. 

“Just this,” Paxton answered. He turned and kissed her forehead. It wasn’t romantic. For the first time since she came home, he wasn’t thinking about Devi romantically. He was clinging to his friend. The person who knew him best. It made him feel better, just sitting with her like this. It felt safe. 

It felt like he was home. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is really just them eating and hanging out. but like....feelings...

Something shifted. 

Devi wasn’t sure what it was or why but this felt different. 

For one thing, she was sleeping better. She hoped that would happen after she apologized and it did help, but even after the physical altercation at Disneyland, when Devi got into bed that night, she felt relieved. When Paxton texted to let her know he’d gotten home okay, something settled into her bones. Contentment, maybe? She sent him back a list of instructions, expecting a biting reply but it never came. 

And then whatever happened in his classroom. 

Devi tried to ignore it, the gravitational pull that was yanking her closer and closer to him, but at some point, she wondered, why fight it? She was her own worst enemy. Being right was more important than anything else. But she was wrong. Desperate to convince herself that they were different now and that he was ridiculous to wait for her, she’d missed that she wasn’t that different, and he wasn’t that different, and those heady, breathless feelings she had when he was near were worth waiting for. Nobody forced him to wait and when she was back in his orbit, she could see why he waited.

Of course, she wasn’t going to tell him any of that. She still needed to extricate herself from her own mess of a long distance relationship. And she hadn’t even been home a month and she was already falling back in whatever this was with Paxton Hall-Yoshida? Surely she could stretch this out a little. It felt downright embarrassing to be this enamored so quickly.  _ Have some control, Devi, _ she thought to herself. 

She knocked on Eleanor’s door because of the text.    
  
**Eleanor to Devi:** **  
** **Trent made way too many ribs. You love ribs. I know you’re at work but surely you have a break at some point. Come eat. Please. There are so many ribs.**   
  
The text included a photo of Trent with a goofy smile, holding a pair of tongs, next to his grill outside. The grill had several racks of ribs. It was endearing. 

No one answered the door and Devi pulled out her phone to text Eleanor but knocked once more. Paxton opened the door holding a container of butter.    
  
“You got the too many ribs text message, too, huh?” He motioned for her to come in. “We’re in the backyard.”   
  
“You were tasked with getting butter?” Devi asked, coming in and following him to the kitchen.    
  
“For the corn. He didn’t just make ribs. There’s corn, salad, Eleanor did not make rice krispy treats so don’t ask. She was very annoyed when I mentioned it.”

“Classroom all set up now?” Devi asked, stopping at the fridge to grab a drink. Paxton started to open the patio door but stopped. 

“Yep. Meet the teacher is tomorrow. But don’t mention school stuff, Trent’s overdoing it on the ribs because he’s incredibly broken up about school starting.” 

“That’s really a thing? I thought that was just a bit he was doing,” Devi asked, opening her water bottle and taking a sip. 

It felt sort of like they were sharing secrets at the kitchen island and it was nostalgic. It transported her to the summer Trent and Eleanor danced around each other. That was also the summer Devi told Paxton she loved him. (And he told her right back) But she wasn’t going to dwell on that bit. He was too hot with his scruff and his tan and now this gentle concern for his best friend who was upset about his kid going to school. All points contributing to Paxton being incredibly attractive while standing in front of her in Trent’s kitchen. 

Paxton leaned in closer and lowered his voice, she could feel his breath on her cheek. “It’s really a thing and us making fun of it made it worse so we can’t mention it.”    
  
Devi put on a serious face and nodded. “No school talk, got it.” She couldn’t help but smile at the end. This was absurd. But Paxton winked at her and turned around. “Do you want to get lunch tomorrow? Before I go to work?” Devi blurted out, not really thinking about lunch, thinking more about how her heart sped up when he leaned in. 

For his part though, he didn’t even turn around. “Have to be at school from 9AM to 7PM tomorrow. Parents have all day to come in so I can’t really leave.” 

“I could bring you something,” Devi offered, but Paxton shook his head and opened the door, he gestured for her to go first and she did.

“The PTA has a whole spread for us, don’t worry about me.” 

“I’m sure Kayla would pick you up something.” She only suggested he date the woman yesterday because Devi got too close and comfortable. She needed to remind herself that she shouldn’t be interested in Paxton. She had a boyfriend and she was too stubborn to admit any feelings for him. Of course, today, after deciding that yes, the feelings were there and it was fine, bringing up Kayla felt petty. That didn’t stop her though. Running her mouth was another thing she hadn’t outgrown. 

Devi waved at Eleanor who was standing by the trampoline, watching the kids jump. Trent shouted hello from the grill. This conversation couldn’t possibly last that much longer.    
  
“It’s not in her job description.” Paxton put the butter down on the picnic table and sat down, straddling the bench. Devi sat next to him with her back to the table. 

“She’d do it for you. She’d get you lunch. A class roster that you already have, she’d birth you a child, you know, whatever you need,” Devi gave him a fake smile. She couldn’t believe she was doing this but she couldn't stop herself. 

“I don’t want her to birth me a child,” Paxton said, flicking her thigh. 

“What is going on?” Eleanor asked, having come up to them at a terrible point of conversation. 

Devi rested her elbows on the table behind her, moving her leg over to knock into Paxton’s knee. But she never moved it so once she bumped into his knee, her thigh was just there, resting against his knee. 

“One of the secretaries at Paxton’s school has a crush on him.” 

“That old lady just thinks he’s cute,” Eleanor said, crossing her arms across her chest.

“Not Mrs. Johnson, she’s like a thousand.” Paxton made a face and Devi laughed. 

“I didn’t meet the old lady,” Devi put a hand over her mouth as she laughed. “Probably be pretty hard for her to birth you a child.” 

“Who’s pregnant?” Trent asked, putting the ribs on the table. Paxton closed his eyes and shook his head. 

“No one.” 

“Devi, do you even want to have kids?” Trent asked. Now Devi frowned and Paxton snorted.    
  
“Why would you ask me that?” Devi clutched at imaginary pearls. “We’re not talking about me!” 

“You seem to be pretty uncomfortable around our kids,” Trent said. He couldn’t have timed it better because Emma ran by and Devi pulled her legs in so as to not touch her.

“Kids are fine. I just wish they’d stop putting marbles and Hot Wheels cars up their noses.” 

Everyone cringed. 

“A Hot Wheels car? How’d the kid even get it up there?” Eleanor asked, horrified. 

“I don’t know but the kid’s dad tried to use lube to get it out before they resorted to driving to the ER,” Devi explained and again everyone cringed. “It was an absolute mess. That reminds me, I’m getting a subscription from Amazon for tissues for your class, Paxton. You need them. God, kids are so gross.” 

“Excuse you, I’m not gross!” Teddy was standing in front of Devi, his hands on his hips, like he was a superhero. 

“Yeah, you are,” Devi said without hesitation. 

“Mom! Tell her I’m not gross!” 

Eleanor put on a fake smile. “Sweetie, you’re kinda gross. But I love you no matter what!” 

“Told you,” Devi mocked the kid, shaking her shoulders and sticking out her tongue. 

“You’re such an only child,” Paxton added, flicking her thigh again.

“Yes, so when I have kids, the kids will just have to know who comes first. I’m always the center of attention. As long as the kids know that, then we’ll be fine.” 

“Speaking of,” Eleanor started. “My mom said she’d watch the kids so we could go on a cruise in January for our tenth anniversary!” 

Devi gasped. “Are you going to Mexico? The Caribbean? Alaska? Where’s the cruise going?”

“Probably nowhere,” Trent chimed in. “Her mom’s gonna flake. That’s why the deposit is refundable.” 

Devi and Eleanor’s smiles fell. “He’s right. My mom probably will flake. But it’s fun to imagine she won’t and I could be lying on a beach in Aruba.” 

“I’ll watch the kids,” Paxton said. He flicked Devi’s leg for the third time. “Devi will help.” She looked at him sideways. And started to say something but he stopped her with a shake of his head. “It’s not like it’s gonna be hard. We’ll watch them and you guys can enjoy your tenth anniversary.” 

“It’s a five day cruise. You guys, that’s too much. You can’t watch our kids for a week,” Eleanor said, picking up a carrot from the table and chomping on it. 

“Yeah, seems like a bad idea. School is still gonna be in, what, are you gonna take a week off a school to watch our tiny demons?” Trent asked. “And Devi, are you sure?”

“You were going to let Eleanor’s mom do it,” Devi countered. Suddenly the idea that she wasn’t capable of watching the kids had her pushing to watch the kids. “She’s useless! I’m definitely better at childcare than her!” 

“And maybe you two could stop mentioning how we ruined your wedding if we do this for you, let you have a nice tenth anniversary on a cruise ship without worrying about the kids,” Paxton offered. 

Devi cringed. Bringing up the wedding was not a good idea. But Eleanor and Trent both tilted their heads like they were considering that. 

“You did almost ruin the wedding,” Trent said slowly, like he was deciding as he spoke. 

“And at least I know if there was an emergency, you’d both handle it well.” Eleanor’s brow furrowed. “But i don’t know…”   
  
Devi’s phone vibrated and she checked it to see if it was the hospital. It wasn’t so she put it back on the table and turned to Eleanor. “We’ll go to the park, we’ll jump on the trampoline, we’ll paint and do crafts. You know I love a craft.”

As Devi talked, Eleanor picked up Devi’s phone and gave her a look. “Devi, you have to pick up the phone when your boyfriend calls.”    
  
Devi snatched the phone back from Eleanor and felt Paxton physically put distance between the two of them. His knee was no longer against her thigh and she saw out of the corner of her eye him turning away, frowning. 

“Mind your own business!” she snapped but she stood up. The phone rang again and Eleanor gave her a judgy look, guilting Devi into answering. Narrowing her eyes at Eleanor she started, “Not because you told me to, but because it must be important if he’s calling again.” 

She answered and stood up, walking towards the far end of the yard for some privacy. When she turned back, she saw Paxton turn away, he’d been watching her but didn’t want her to know that. On a scale of one to ten, how bad would it be to break up with Jordan on the phone right now? Probably an eleven but she was considering it between Eleanor’s judgement and Paxton’s reaction of...whatever that was. 

“Do you have time to talk?” Jordan asked through the phone. 

“Not really, I’m on my lunch from work and I’ve got to get back soon,” she lied as she watched the kids chase after a ball. Teddy had an ear of corn in one hand, giving a whole new literal meaning to the phrase butter fingers. 

“I was hoping you could come out to Boston for Labor Day, Devi, I miss you,” Jordan sounded sincere and that made it worse. 

“I work holidays, I had to move heaven and earth to get Ganesh Puja off next week so I could go with my mom,” Devi explained. 

“Ganesh Puja?” 

“It’s a religious holiday.” Had she really not mentioned anything related to her religion the entire time they’d been dating? God, what was she doing with this guy? She turned back to see Paxton lifting Emma to sit next to him, taking the corn she clearly stole from her brother and putting it on another plate. 

The last time she’d seriously considered having kids was probably when she had to do a rotation in OB years ago. Who had the time? And who did she even like enough to tie herself to? She hadn’t even considered it when she’d been engaged. But Paxton helping Emma get her food had Devi remembering how her own father would dish her plates. She’d snatch some of what her father was having anyway and he’d pick off her plate, teasing her and laughing the whole time. Her mother would roll her eyes but she never said anything. 

Paxton might be the kind of father that her dad was. But would she be like her mom? No. She could do better. Of course, Devi knew as an adult that her mother had done the best she could. But Devi could do better. She could be more understanding, she could listen, she could-

“I just feel like you’re not invested, Devi,” Jordan raised his voice on the other end of the line snapping her out of her thoughts. 

“When we started dating you knew I worked a lot,” she pushed back, the easiest excuse was always work. “And you work a lot too.” 

Good job, fall back on work. Not on the fact that she was just thinking about having another man’s children. 

Devi shook her head, decisively. “I’ve got to get back to work. Why don’t you call me on Sunday and we’ll watch a movie together or something?”   
  
“Are you going to have time?” he sounded annoyed. 

“Yes. Definitely. We’ll watch the new Terminator movie. I know you wanted to see that.” Devi did listen occasionally. She knew he wanted to see it. So a little Netflix Party and some Facetime and that would hold him off for a while until she could figure out how to break up with him. 

When she got off the phone, she walked back over and sat down on the opposite side of the table as before, across from Paxton. Eleanor started to say something about the call but Devi gave a quick shake of her head and a tilt towards Paxton and Eleanor got the message. It would make things awkward so better not discuss it. 

“So, we will watch the kids for your cruise,” Paxton said, jutting his chin as if that was final. Devi, desperate to move on from the phone call nodded eagerly.    
  
“Yes, we will. Even if they stick marbles up their nose.” Everyone made a face but Devi rolled on, “I’m saving you an ER trip so doesn’t that make me most qualified for this? Way more qualified than your flighty mom!” 

Trent nodded in agreement. “Yeah, okay, I’m good with the plan. And maybe we’ll stop holding it over you two that you ruined our wedding.”    
  
Paxton rolled his eyes and Devi cringed.

“Stop saying that! We didn’t technically ruin the wedding.” 

Devi reached out and touched Paxton’s forearm. “I’m obviously on your side because I’m wrapped up in this too, but I think if you have to use the word technically, it’s not a great claim of our innocence.” 

Paxton kicked her under the table. 

“Rude.” Devi glared at him and pulled back her hand. 

By the time Devi was about to head back to work, she’d inhaled many ribs and they’d mapped out a plan for the very likely chance that Paxton and Devi would babysit the kids so Eleanor and Trent could go on their tenth anniversary cruise.  Paxton stopped her just as she was opening the front door to walk to her car. She turned and looked at him, but he was following her more closely than she thought and she bumped into his chest. He put his hands on her arms and took a small step back. It disappointed Devi more than she wanted to examine at that moment that he put the space between them. 

“Can you tell your mom I’ll be by on Saturday morning to mow?”

“Yeah,” she said, trying not to sound disappointed. Devi didn’t know why he’d stopped her but she hoped it was something more about her and not about her mom and their yard. But they were friends. She hadn’t broken up with her boyfriend. They were friends though. “Saturday. Right.” 

Paxton was looking at her lips now though and she paused and gulped. This was very confusing but she decided to just keep going. 

“Saturday is Ganesh Puja, I had to move stuff around and instead of working my usual shift, I’m working overnight. Would you mind dropping me some dinner?”

“Ganesh Puja already? Feels early this year,” he said with a shrug of his shoulders. “Don’t want to be gross but I’m very interested in seeing you all dressed up.” 

“Oh, I look hot. I started doing this really smokey eye, it makes the whole look.” Devi had grown comfortable with her culture since high school. Plus, she was actually excited to see Kamala there. She still hadn’t seen her since she’d been home. 

Paxton laughed and reached up to touch Devi’s face. She gulped again. He pressed his thumb against the side of her mouth and rubbed, then put his thumb up so she could see it. 

“You’re a mess, you know that?” he asked, showing her the barbeque sauce he’d just cleaned from her face. 

Devi closed her eyes and shook her head. “Yes, thank you.”    
  
“I’ll bring you dinner Saturday night. 

“Only if you have time,” Devi replied, feeling weird about the request now. 

“I have time.”   
  
“You could be on a date with what’s her name from school.”    
  
“Not likely,” Paxton said before sticking his hands in his pockets. 

Devi’s phone dinged with a text from the hospital, snapping her back to reality. “See you.”    
  
“Yeah,” Paxton said, giving a wave as she walked out the door. 

\--

Devi did very well working a mid shift. She didn’t like getting up early and she was pretty useless after about 3AM so working her 2-2 shift was perfect. But she got up early to get ready for Ganesh Puja and then she didn’t get into work until 7PM and by 9PM, she was dragging. It didn’t help that the patients were spaced out just right. Normally, she’d flit from one patient to another or there would be only a few patients with long stretches of nothing to do so she could nap. Very rarely did this hospital's ER get busy and rambunctious like the ER of a medical show. It’s one of the things she liked about being home versus being in Boston.    
  
Tonight was one of the nights where they were spaced out just right where she would have time to sit down for a few minutes, get sleepy, and then a patient would need her care. Never long enough to nap. Just enough time to get comfortable. 

When Paxton showed up at 10PM with food, she was cranky. She’d been trying to read an article about Parkinson’s for an hour but kept getting interrupted by patients. 

“How was Ganesh Puja?” he asked, unpacking the Chinese food he picked up. 

“I saw Kamala and it was great. That still feels weird to say but I missed her.” Devi started to shut her computer but stopped, remembering the article. “Hey, do you wanna read this article? It’s about-” 

Paxton had stopped, holding a container of veggies mid air and tilted his head looking at the screen. “Are those my dad’s medical records?”

Devi frowned and looked at the screen, quickly clicking out of the window. “No.”    
  
Paxton gave her a look that said he didn’t buy her lie. “Isn’t that illegal? Like a HIPPO violation or something?”

“HIPAA, and no because I wasn’t looking at your dad’s medical records.” 

Paxton sat down and reached for her knee. “Part of the reason I didn’t tell you about my dad is because you’re a problem solver. I know that about you. I’m sure that makes you a great doctor but you’re not my dad’s doctor so you don’t have to solve this.” He was sincere instead of annoyed and Devi felt a gnawing in her stomach that reminded her to break up with her boyfriend because the man in front of her knew her so much better than she liked to admit. 

“The article I was trying to show you was written by a friend. I’ve been trying to read it for an hour and I was considering matching some of the findings with stuff in your dad’s record.” She put her hand over his on her knee. “I’m sorry. I won’t wade into this.” 

“Thank you,” he said, giving her a small smile and then sitting up more, handing her a plastic fork. 

“Okay well, new problem I’m solving then, I’m worried about my mom.” She picked up a container and started to pick through the broccoli to get to the beef. 

“What’s wrong with your mom? Is she okay? She seemed fine this morning,” Paxton said, opening a container of noodles.   
  
“She’s fine,” Devi explained and Paxton seemed to relax. “But she could fall at any moment!”   
  
“What?” he asked, confused. 

“This woman came in tonight, she’d broken one of her arms and bruised her hip badly when she fell in the shower. She wasn’t even that old. I think she was just clumsy. But I have to convince my mom to remodel the shower in her bathroom to a walk in. She doesn’t need a tub anyways and it’s a hazard.”    
  
Paxton leaned back in his chair and finished chewing before he started, “I’ve seen your mom power walk faster than skateboarders. Your mom’s in great condition and she’s not clumsy. That’s kinda your thing.” 

“That’s rude.” (But he was right.)   
  
“Just this morning I watched you trip over air while you walked out of your house on your way to Ganesh Puja.” 

“I did no such thing,” she said, kicking the leg of the chair he was leaning back in so it fell to the ground, startling him.    
  
“Now who’s rude?” He reached into the container she was holding and stabbed a broccoli before putting it in his mouth, not taking his eyes off her the whole time. 

Devi rolled her eyes. 

“Dr. Vishwakumar,” a nurse came into the breakroom. Despite calling for Devi, her eyes were firmly on Paxton. “Oh, hello.”    
  
“What do you need Taylor?” Devi asked, annoyed. 

“Just letting you know that the guy with the sunburn in bed 9 left.” Again, the information was meant for Devi but the nurse was looking at Paxton. This time, she swore she saw her wink at him when she held out her hand to him. “I’m Taylor.” 

“He’s dating someone,” Devi said, watching Paxton try to put his food and fork down to shake the nurse’s hand. Immediately, Taylor soured and turned to Devi. 

“Sunburn went home. He bolted. Didn’t wait to be discharged or anything. Just left. Dr. Reynolds said you needed to do the paperwork.” 

“I’ll do it when I’m done eating, make sure no one else escapes before I finish my sweet and sour chicken, okay?” “I’m not a prison guard but I’ll do my best,” the nurse threw over her shoulder.    


Paxton waited for the nurse to leave before staring at Devi with a smug look. “I’m dating someone?”

Devi scoffed. “She’d have sat down next to you and started reading your birth chart if I hadn’t lied.”   
  
“Maybe I want to know my birth chart, Devi, as far as I know, I’m a Kaepernick with venus rising in my Super Soaker.” He laughed at his own joke and Devi rolled her eyes again. “Sure you’re not jealous?”   
  
“Oh, like you were when I made that joke about Randall Curtis?” Devi put her elbow on the table and rested her chin on her hand. 

“I thought you cheated on me!” Paxton defended. 

Devi dropped her shoulders and looked at him seriously. “I didn’t ever cheat on you. I would never. I know your hangups with that. I didn’t do it when we dated and I wouldn’t do it now.” 

She shouldn’t have said  _ now _ . They weren’t talking about now. And she was dating someone else. And actually maybe she had come close to cheating on someone else  _ with _ him. 

He took a deep breath and was about to say something but Devi didn’t want to talk about the  _ now _ blunder.    
  
“So my mom.”   
  
Paxton looked away, his head rounding like it was on a swivel and she could see his brain changing directions by his body language. He pressed his lips together for a moment and then picked up another container of food. “Remodeling the master bath is the wrong idea.” 

“Why? I know she already turned me down but-”

He pointed his fork at her. “You should be building an addition to put a master suite on the first floor.” 

Devi’s brows lowered. She hadn’t thought about that. “There’s no way I’d get her to agree to that.” 

“Oh, I didn’t know this was something you were actually going to do, I thought this was all hypothetical.” He took a bite of the chicken. 

“I just think it’d be easier to convince her to put a standing shower in her bathroom, not add a whole wing to the house,” Devi explained. 

“My mom tore her ACL last year and couldn’t do stairs for five weeks, so my parents moved into Becca’s old room. They haven’t moved back because they like being on the first floor. Eventually, your mom will have trouble with stairs, could be 30 years from now, but still, no use remodeling an upstairs bathroom when you should add a bathroom downstairs. Turn the office into a bedroom.” 

She folded her arms across her chest and considered it. 

“She’ll outlive us all, so might as well have her downstairs,” Paxton added. 

“I told her she couldn’t die ever so…” Devi said with a shrug. 

“And that’s a totally reasonable request you made, but eventually, the stairs will be a problem. So it’s that or sell the house and buy a ranch style. But I don’t think your mom will sell the house.”    
  
“Whoa, I don’t want to sell the house!” Devi surprised herself at the speed to which she said that. 

Paxton put down the container of chicken and leaned in closer. His knee touching hers. 

“I know, it’s your dad’s house. That’s why I said your mom won’t sell it. I understand.” 

Devi cleared her throat and looked away. Paxton knew too much and Devi felt like she might cry at the mention of her father. She thought she was way beyond that but it turned out grief came in waves, even 15 years later. 

“Dr. Vishwakumar, there’s a stab wound coming in, three minutes out,” Taylor, the nurse, popped her head into the breakroom with more purpose and urgency than before. 

Devi nodded to her and stood up. “Sorry, I have to go, this might take a while so don’t wait for me.”    
  
“Yeah, yeah, go,” he said, waving her off. 

“We should do this more,” she said, grabbing a piece of broccoli with her fingers and putting it in her mouth.   
  
“Eat?” Paxton clarified and Devi nodded, mouth still full of broccoli. “Yeah, okay.” 

Eating was a good way to avoid getting too close but a great excuse to hang out. Less like a date than Disneyland trips and she had to eat, right? This was good. A good plan. And so the plan went for the next two months. 

\--

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wish I could say this long update time won't happen again but there's a global pandemic and frankly, I'm very tired. But I'm working on this. I promise.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone else thinks they've got Devi and Paxton figured out, Teddy gets sick, and Devi runs another con because she just can't help herself. (And she loves cake) 
> 
> This was originally the first part of a much much longer chapter that I had to split. The good news is that you get "we're pretending to be married to try wedding cake" now and very shortly you'll get another fun bit because it's already written.

Lorraine Johnson had worked at Sherman Oaks Elementary School for 39 years. She stayed home with her twins, Vincent and Evelyn until they went to kindergarten and then she got a job in their school office to be close to them. Vincent loved that. She remembered how he used to come into the office, some envelope or paper he was bringing to the office just so he could see his mother. It was adorable. 

But those days were long gone. Vincent was a truck driver now and she only got to see him at Christmas. Evelyn was still in town though. She had three kids that had all come through this very school and popped in to see their grandma, just like their mother and uncle had when they were kids. Currently in the office though, was a feverish Teddy Harrison. The school nurse only came in the morning but since it was after lunch, all Mrs. Johnson could do for poor little Teddy was to take his temperature, call his dad, and sit him on a chair waiting to be picked up. 

“Teddy, sweetie, take this water and sip it okay? Your dad will be here in about 10 minutes,” Mrs. Johnson told him as she put him on the scratchy chair. “You don’t think you’re gonna throw up, do you? I have a bag if you need it.”

Teddy shook his head slowly and leaned his cheek against the back of the chair, pulling his legs up underneath him. 

Mrs. Johnson caught a peek of the parking lot and saw one Devi Vishwakumar in her oversized Disneyland shirt and a pair of shorts that Lorraine never would have let her daughter out of the house in. Likely, neither would Devi’s mother but Devi was an adult now. Mrs. Johnson didn’t remember much about Devi when she was a student except she was never late for school. Never being late meant that Mrs. Johnson didn’t see her hardly at all. 

“Hmmmm, Ms. Devi is coming in,” Lorraine threw over her shoulder at Kayla, the very competent attendance secretary the district hired at the beginning of the year. “As many times as she’s been over here lately, I don’t think you’ve got a chance with Mr. Hall-Yoshida, Kayla.” 

Kayla rolled her eyes, a slight flush on her cheek. “Mrs. Johnson, I’m fine. Please stop gossiping like that. You old ladies love to gossip!” She kept typing on her computer but Mrs. Johnson knew that Kayla had a crush. But she also knew that Mr. Hall-Yoshida hadn’t looked at anyone sideways since Devi moved back home. Just Devi. 

“It’s after lunch so I guess you’re not bringing food for our favorite toiling second grade teacher,” Mrs. Johnson said, greeting Devi with a smile as she pulled her oversized sunglasses off. 

“It’s my day off so as soon as school is out we’re going to Disneyland,” Devi said, signing in on the sheet at the counter. “How are you today, ladies?”

“Oh just fine, just fine,” Lorraine said. “Kayla’s fine too, right Kayla?” 

The woman rolled her eyes just barely again but smiled sincerely at Devi. “I’m doing well, thank you.”

Devi put her keys on the counter so she could take the visitor pass that Kayla handed her and put it on her shirt. Devi looked behind her and spotted Teddy on the chair. 

“What’s going on with you, bud?” Devi asked, her voice a little different than how she spoke to anyone else. 

“He’s got a fever of 100.1. His dad’s on his way to pick him up,” Mrs. Johnson explained. “Should be here any minute.” 

Devi was already kneeling down by the chair where Teddy was curled up. She felt his forehead and smiled. 

“I’m not gonna puke, I already told that lady I’m not gonna puke,” Teddy said, more subdued than he usually was but still that little Teddy attitude. 

“Can I sit with you until your dad comes?” Devi asked, so softly that Lorraine almost didn’t hear it. Teddy didn’t so much as answer verbally as he reached for Devi’s neck. She picked him up and slipped into the chair, with Teddy’s arms around her neck, his head resting on her shoulder, and his legs splayed on either side of her waist. 

Devi didn’t exactly look comfortable, but she got her arm around so she could look at her phone while holding Teddy and after a moment even rested her cheek on Teddy’s head. They sat like that for 15 minutes until Mr. Harrison came rushing into the office like someone had died. 

“I’m here to get Teddy, Teddy Harrison, someone called me and said he was sick? I’m here, I can take him home right now!” The man was flapping his arms and his voice was high pitched and panicked. “Or to the ER? Do I need to take him to the ER?”

That startled Devi out of her comfortable position holding Teddy and she stood up slowly and a little unsteady under the weight of the kindergartener. Mrs. Johnson didn’t tell Mr. Harrison where Teddy was so much as she pointed her chin behind him, at Devi getting out of the chair. 

“Devi? Why do you have Teddy?” Mr. Harrison quickly took Teddy and held him against his chest, checking his forehead and going over the child like he might be bleeding somewhere. 

“It’s just a fever, Trent,” Devi said, calmly. Mrs. Johnson remembered that Devi was a doctor and realized that was the change in tone she was hearing, both when Devi talked to Teddy earlier and now as she spoke to his dad. 

“My ear hurts too but I’m not gonna puke,” Teddy muttered against his dad’s chest. 

“Your ear hurts?” Devi asked, concerned. “Mrs. Johnson, does the nurse’s office have an otoscope?”

“I don’t know what that is, dear,” Lorraine answered. “But you’re welcome to look in the office.” She opened the door for her and Devi went directly to the wall and pulled a tool off the wall meant to look in ears. 

“Teddy, I’m gonna look in your ears.” 

Teddy winced when she checked the first ear, but was calm as she checked the second. 

“Is it an ear infection? He’s only had one, but Emma gets them all the time. Almost had to have tubes put in.” Mr. Harrison was as frazzled as Lorraine had ever seen him, though he was a bit of a worry to begin with.

Devi rustled the hair on Teddy’s head and smiled. “Yeah, your ear is super swollen. It’s like you have some tiny germ monsters in there, but don’t worry, you can take some medicine to get them out.” 

“I thought you were coming to see me, not diagnose random children,” Mr. Hall-Yoshida cut in. According to the clock, his class was at gym so of course, he must have come looking for his friend, Devi. He was always calling her his friend but Mrs. Johnson was sure that soon they would be more than friends. 

“Leave her alone, Teddy is sick, I don’t think you teachers have them wash their hands enough in school,” Mr. Harrison accused Mr. Hall-Yoshida. 

“Dude, chill.”

“What’s your preferred pharmacy, Trent? I’ll call them and get some antibiotics put in, save you a trip to the pediatrician.” Devi navigated herself in between the two men, slyly, like perhaps she’d broken up a fight between them before. 

Must be a lot of history between these three, Mrs. Johnson thought to herself. 

“The Walgreens on Seventh St is good, and thanks, I guess we should keep you around, huh? This was much easier than going to the pediatrician.” 

Devi smiled and turned to Mr. Hall-Yoshida. “I just sat with Teddy while he waited for Trent. He’s pretty pitiful looking so I didn’t want him to sit by himself.” Devi fingered the tie on his chest. “A tie? Are we going somewhere fancy?”

“I lost a bet with a student, the good news is that their idea of me losing a bet is either candy bars or having to wear a tie, I’m gonna change my shirt before we leave.” He swatted Devi’s hand away. “You’re finally looking Disney appropriate. I like your shirt.” 

“Paxton, you’re looking at her legs. You’re staring at her legs,” Mr. Harrison pointed out, a sly smile on his face. 

“No, I’m not,” Mr. Hall-Yoshida glared at his friend. “I thought you were taking your sick kid home?” 

Devi was clearly holding back a laugh but she didn’t break. “Let’s go back to your classroom, Mr. H-Y, clearly you boys can’t play nice.” 

“You know how boys are,” Mrs. Johnson interjected, waving as Mr. Harrison signed the form to take Teddy home. Devi smiled warmly at her as she pushed Mr. Hall-Yoshida down the hall. 

Mrs. Johnson turned to Kayla when the office had cleared out. “You really don’t have a chance.” 

Kayla huffed. “Lorraine, I was well aware of my chances when my brother said that Devi and Paxton were inseparable when they started dating in high school. You’re not giving me any new information, just pestering me. I’ll tell you what, I heard Mrs. Sampson from 5th grade is cheating on her wife. You want that gossip? I also know-”

“Okay, okay, we’ll talk about the other gossip!” Mrs. Johnson laughed. “I’ll leave you alone.”

“Thank you,” Kayla replied with relief. 

\--

  
It was a bit of a drive but Paxton had been told by no less than four people that the drive was worth it. 

“This seems like a long way to go for a sandwich,” Devi said, looking out the window. She was running her finger up and down the pane, making little patterns that Paxton couldn’t see. It was something she did when she was nervous. Or something she had done when she was nervous when she was 17. Maybe now she just did it to keep her hands busy because she wasn’t driving.

“We’re almost there, look, my phone says two more minutes.” 

“I’m off on a rare Saturday and you think it’s a good idea to drive out to the middle of nowhere because someone told you this deli was good.” She didn’t ask a question, but her tone implied she was asking if he was crazy for this. 

“Look, it’s right here,” he said, hitting his blinker and turning into the small, packed parking lot. 

“Excuse me,” Devi asked, sitting up straight, shocked. “This isn’t a deli, this is Crash Test Cakes!”

“Yes?” Paxton asked, surprised. 

“The cakes are massive and they are beautiful and they’re apparently all amazing flavor combinations that no one has ever thought to try.” 

Paxton pursed his lips. He didn’t know Devi would be this excited. He watched her smooth her hair down and look around at all the cars. She even pulled out some lip gloss. 

“I thought you’d like it because they have cake flights. You know, like beer flights? A bunch of tiny servings of cake flavors on one tray?” 

“I know what a cake flight is and no I will not share one with you, I’ll need my own.” Devi hopped out of the car and was to the door before Paxton could finish laughing about her demands of her own tray of cake. 

They were lucky to find a table. The place was bursting at the seams with people, it was loud, and the scrap of chairs on the floor was a constant beat. Devi handed him the laminated one page menu on the table and then took one for herself. She was beaming and Paxton tried to school his face so as to not give away the fact that he couldn’t stop staring at her.

“Okay listen, we’re about to hit the rush and I’m actually on my way out the door so your server will be Melissa but I’ll take your orders so you don’t get stuck waiting for like half an hour.” The woman with multicolored hair and several piercings on her face smiled barely. “I’m Starr.” 

Paxton panicked and looked at Devi but she didn’t miss a beat. 

“Thanks Starr. It seems busy but I bet it gets even worse, right?” She didn’t wait for Starr to respond, and kept plowing on. “I’ll have the shrimp caesar salad with extra croutons and a Diet Coke.” Devi tilted her chin towards Paxton and he knew he was up but had barely looked at the menu. “He wants a glass of ice water with lots of lemon and what? I saw they had a cuban? You want that?”

Paxton nodded, feeling like when his mom ordered for him when he was a little kid. 

“And should we order the cake flight now? Because I want like two.”

“Yeah, you wanna order that now but hot tip,” Starr leaned in a little closer. “I’m gonna put in the wedding cake flight for you two.” 

“We’re not-” Paxton tried but Devi smacked his shoulder to stop him. 

“Let the woman talk,” she said sharply. 

“So the thing is the wedding cake flight is huge and it has all our favorite flavors and our top hits basically. Plus the cake slices are more four bite slices instead of two bite slices. You’re gonna want that. You seem like the kinda woman who wants that.”

“Yes, I want that and I want to be your new best friend, Starr. Please bring us the wedding cake flight.” 

Paxton snorted. “Hopefully the lunch food too.” 

“Yeah, yeah, I don’t care what order it comes out in,” Devi said, giving him a sideways glance. 

“Diet Coke and shrimp caesar, water with hella lemon and a cuban, and the famous wedding flight. I’m gonna put that into the kitchen for you and remember, I’m outta here so your server Melissa will bring you the food. She’s great, like me but with less hair.” 

And in a flash, Starr, the wild haired, super pierced, slick talking server was gone. 

“What just happened?” Paxton asked, his knee bumping into Devi’s under the table. He tried not to touch her but sometimes he just had to and he hoped she didn’t notice. Touching her was fine. It wasn’t like a romantic touch. It was a friendly touch! They were friends! 

Devi turned to him, that big wide smile that showed all her teeth, and he spotted the smallest flash of her tongue sticking between her teeth. He really needed to stop looking at her mouth like that. 

“We just got the inside help on getting the wedding cake flight. Oh my god, I love this place.” She looked around again, her eyes not sticking to any spot, constantly swiveling like there was too much for her to take in but she wanted to take it all in immediately. “I love this. I love you. Thanks for dragging me out here.” 

“You’re welcome,” he said without processing what she’d said but then...wait what? It hung in the air for a minute, him catching up and then Devi turned, focusing on him, her cheeks flushed just a little. 

“I meant-”

“Everybody loves cake. Right? It’s cake.” He cut her off before she could make it even worse. He didn’t know what she wanted to say about the slip up and didn’t want to hear her take it back. He could pretend. They were pretending already so she could get the wedding cake flight. 

Devi tilted her head and frowned, her knee bumped his though, and it stayed there. He was not mad about it. “Some people don’t.”

“Sounds fake.” Paxton looked at her but she looked away. “Oh my god, Jordan doesn’t like cake?”

Her face scrunched up and she closed her eyes like she wouldn’t have to tell him he was right if she didn’t have to look at him. 

“I’m not gonna say it but you know what I want to say, Devi.” 

She opened her eyes and glared at him now. She knew. Paxton should get points for not saying she should break up with her dumb boyfriend. 

“He’s always on some diet, the diet changes but it never allows carbs which is stupid because diets are stupid and they don’t work and if you read the studies, you’re just hurting your body and opening a door to disordered eating and that’s massively fucked up-” She was getting worked up in that fun way. When she knew a lot about something and she could go on for hours about all the ways someone else was wrong. It was fun to watch, it was less fun to be the one she was correcting. “And a slice of cake isn’t going to kill you? You know what’s gonna kill you? A heart attack from your arteries being filled with cholesterol because you ate like a caveman, except we don’t even know what the fuck cavemen actually ate!”

“Hi!” A stout girl with a shaved head interrupted Devi’s rant as she put down their drinks. “I’m Melissa. Starr got your orders in, sorry it took me so long to get your drinks. Your food is gonna be another few minutes and then we’ll get the wedding cake flight out to you.” 

“Thanks,” Paxton said just as Devi took a deep breath. She had been ranting for a minute. 

“So can I see the ring?” Melissa asked, waggling her eyebrows. 

Devi floundered, her mouth gaping like she was trying to come up with a lie. It was fine, though, she saved him that time at Ikea, he could save her for this one.

“It’s being sized!” he said too loudly while Devi coughed. “I’m such a loser and even though I asked Eleanor at least ten times, I got the size wrong.” 

Devi nodded slowly as he explained and then gave Melissa a big smile. It didn’t even look fake. “I have a picture here,” she said as she fumbled for her phone. 

“She doesn’t need a picture, it’s not a test for the wedding cake flight, it’s just conversation, babe,” he said, putting his hand over her phone and turning back to the server. “It’s a princess cut white topaz with diamond accent frame and gold band. I got it off Etsy, this incredible little jeweler.”

Devi’s head turned to look at him sharply, a bit of a twinkle in her eye, she was impressed. 

“Sounds gorgeous!” Melissa said as the bell on the door signaled more diners. “Be back in a sec with your food!” And she was gone. 

Devi put her elbow on the table and leaned her chin on her hand, a wicked grin slowly forming. It was very hot and Paxton gulped a little. “White topaz?”

“You want a blood diamond instead? Topaz is your birthstone!” 

“You remember my birthstone? You know an Etsy shop? Paxton Hall-Yoshida, have you purchased an engagement ring before?” Devi sat there smiling like she wasn’t a woman with a boyfriend and was instead considering jumping him. He knew the look. He was well acquainted with Devi’s “let’s fuck” look and he might have had to adjust the way he sat to keep looking at her. This was too close to whatever invisible line they’d drawn. 

“No. I have shopped for one but I haven’t purchased one.” 

“You’re telling me, in all these years, you never once dated someone seriously enough to buy one?” Her face was less “fuck me” and more genuine puzzlement. Trent and Eleanor said she had gone on with her life. She wasn’t waiting for him. And he believed them but the way she looked at him now, he was sure that she was surprised he waited for her. “But you did shop for one, who got close? Who almost became Mrs. Hall-Yoshida.” 

He opened his mouth just barely, trying to figure out what to say, but someone behind them spilled a glass and the scraping of chairs and movement of silverware overtook the moment. 

“I heard someone bought one for you,” Paxton dodged the question, scooting closer to Devi despite his gut telling him to move back. He even put his hand on her shoulder, pulling her in as someone brushed by them. She didn’t take her eyes off him though. 

Devi let out a short, uncomfortable laugh. “Yeah, I almost married this guy a couple years ago. It did not work out and I am relieved it didn’t.” He saw her lick her lips and look down before she threw the next sentence out. “He didn’t like cake either but that just meant more cake for me, so not so bad.” 

“Your boyfriends sound like they suck.” It was bold but for some reason, this packed deli with tables too close together, clinking glasses, and people talking about cake felt very intimate. Or it was the way Devi moved her knee away from his and then scooted her chair in enough that she fit her knee between the two of his. 

“Except you?” Devi asked, her eyes narrowing and her leg beginning to shake like she was anticipating something. 

“Okay, one shrimp caesar and one cuban.” Melissa put plates down in front of them, snapping them both out of the spell. “Smart of you two to go light, the wedding cake flight is huge and it’s gonna take you at least an hour to figure out what you want. But good news, you can have a different flavor in each layer and you’re gonna need three because that’s what the wedding planners are all going for right now.” 

Paxton rubbed at the back of his neck and nodded thanks at Melissa and Devi adjusted her chair so she wasn’t so close. He missed the feel of her knee. 

As they ate, the tension dissipated and Paxton tried to remind himself that was good. Devi had a boyfriend. Devi didn’t want to fuck him. Devi just got very excited when talking about cake.

Eating was a good excuse to move on from the ring discussion. There was no need to talk about the six weeks after Trent and Eleanor’s wedding when he fantasized about buying that princess cut, white topaz with the gold band because she always wore gold. He considered the trendier rose gold because Devi was nothing if not constantly, desperately on trend, but trends changed and it was probably better to get something classic. 

Paxton would fly out to New Jersey in time to make her Princeton graduation and surprise her. Then he’d propose. He could live on the east coast while she went to medical school. Who was gonna feed her when she forgot to eat because she fell asleep studying? He could do that. 

But his grandpa broke his leg and Paxton went to Japan and Trent caught a whiff of his search history and looked at him with pity so he gave up the dream. It was stupid. 

When Melissa brought the wedding cake flight, even Devi’s eyes were wide at the size of the thing. The server deftly swapped their lunch plates for the cake tray that took up the entirety of the table top. Cake squares were lined up in a rainbow pattern, with the white frosting looking like a cloud and the chocolate frosting on the other end, pinks, red, orange, yellows, and some lavender ones in between. Tiny flowers were scattered all over the marble tray tray and a bit of ribbon lined the edges. No wonder these people were famous. This looked like something right out of a magazine. 

“Right there in front of each slice is a tiny label in gold lettering that tells you what you’re eating.” She handed Paxton a pen and a sheet with all the flavors on a clipboard and handed Devi two forks. “There are twenty slices but you can take any combination and any filling or custard and swap them around. It’s on the form. Have fun!” 

Paxton wedged a spot on the end of the table for the clipboard and pen while Devi held out a fork for him. “Devi, are you….crying?”

Devi sniffed and shook her head. “It’s just so beautiful!” 

He leaned in, close enough to her ear that the stray hairs just above tickled his nose. “You know we’re not actually picking a wedding cake, right?”

Devi turned quickly, not allowing Paxton enough time to move so their noses bumped. She was frowning as he chuckled softly, she pushed his shoulder to give herself some more room. 

“Shut up and look like you’re in love with me, this is the best day of my life and I want to marry this cake.” Devi turned back to the cake, while Paxton smiled. With determination, she picked out a slice that was red velvet and dug in her fork. But instead of putting it in her own mouth, she took advantage of the fact that Paxton was still too close and smiling at her like he was in love (because he was, for over a decade) and she shoved it into his mouth, causing him to cough and try to get his mouth around the cake. 

“You got frosting on me,” he whined, his mouth still full of cake. 

“Poor baby,” she said, sarcastically. “Red velvet is just chocolate with a bad dye job. Cross that off the list.” 

“Yes, ma’am,” Paxton said, as Devi wiped the frosting off the corner of his mouth and he reached for the pen and paper. 

They tried a bit of this and a bite of that for a few minutes before Devi started to close her eyes and sort of moan at one of the slices. 

“You okay over there?” he asked, definitely not thinking about that moan in other contexts. 

“This one.” Devi pointed her fork at a slice with streusel on top. “It’s got apple compote, it’s like the best apple pie but cake. Cake is so much better than pie.”

“If you say so. Maybe I’ll order a cake like that for Thanksgiving.” He picked at a lemon slice in the middle. “By the way, my mom wants to know if you are working on Thanksgiving, she is dying for you to come but I told her you’re always working.” 

Devi ate another bite of the apple slice, covering her mouth with her hand and savoring it before turning to him. “I am but there’s always a dinner break. Can’t wait to embarrass you in front of your parents so put me down as coming.” 

Paxton made a face. “No, wait, this is a bad idea.” 

“Sounds great to me!” That wicked smile returned to her face. 

Their forks clashed when reaching for a lavender cake slice that had a tiny flower on top. He swatted Devi’s fork and she bumped her knee into his again. 

“You know, it’s fine, I just remembered, my mom wants your mom to come. I’ll text her just now and let her know so she can put it on the calendar,” Paxton said, reaching for his phone. 

She put her hand on his hand to stop him and then she left it there. “Never mind! I’m too busy! Can’t do it! My mom is vegetarian anyways!” 

“That’s great, so is Becca’s boyfriend! Mom will be able to get the full size tofurkey at Whole Foods.” He elbowed Devi’s side so she would move her hand and he could get to the phone, but he also dropped his fork in the process. 

“Awww, no more cake for you, the rest of this is mine, all mine.” 

The place was starting to clear out and that meant Melissa noticed the dropped fork and came rushing over with another. “Alright love birds, calm down, I’ve got more forks.” 

Paxton winked at Melissa. “Thanks, you’re the best.”

Devi scoffed but before she could say anything, Melissa ran off. 

“You should get your birthday cake here, I’ll tell your mom over Thanksgiving to order it here,” Paxton said, digging into another slice, this one with strawberries and pink frosting.

“You’re being so mean today. Now you’re reminding me of my birthday?” Devi pouted. 

It was Paxton’s turn to scoff. “You love your birthday. You celebrate the whole month.” 

Devi covered her face. “Oh my god, the year I turned 17 you brought me a gift every day.” 

“Because you kept dropping hints and I was sure if I didn’t, you’d be miserable.” 

“How did you even think up 30 gifts?” Devi shook her head and pursed her lips. “You were so good at gift giving. I think I gave you sexual favors for your birthday once. Which was a total copout because what did I even think I was doing? I didn’t even know any good ones then!”

Paxton tried not to blush remembering that exact birthday, but then he remembered something else. 

“No wait, I made you a cheesy as hell photo album once! All the washi tape and stickers, the pictures I printed out from Instagram, god, I think it had our prom photo in it too.” She looked away, embarrassed. “Please tell me you threw that out? How humiliating.” 

“Didn’t even remember it until you just said, I remember the sex, obviously,” he said, trying to cover his tracks. “But uh yeah, pretty sure that album is long gone.”

He was lying. He knew exactly where it was. It was on his bookshelf in his room. A girl he was dating once accused him of cheating because clearly someone that kept something like that was not single. 

“You’re really not gonna celebrate your birthday? A party? All about you? We need to at least go out.” Paxton saw Devi cringing and then remembered. “Or you could go see your boyfriend? Shouldn’t he, like, take you to the Bahamas or something for your birthday? Your thirtieth birthday?”

The last thing he wanted to do was think about Devi’s lug of a boyfriend taking her to an island to lie around on the beach but that was something a boyfriend should do! Paxton would have done that for her! He would have planned the trip a year ago. He would have spent all year gathering clues on where she wanted to go, he couldn’t exactly book a swanky suite but there were deals. He would have found one. She would have cried when he told her. 

Devi frowned. “God, you don’t think he’s gonna do that right? That would be a nightmare.” 

Paxton tilted his head, confused. Devi seemed to catch up and adjusted. 

“The Bahamas, I mean,” she stumbled over her words. “I hate it there. Ew.” She was lying. Devi was a terrible liar. “Anyway, you’re paying for lunch because you reminded me that I’m turning 30 and that’s rude.” 

Devi shrugged her shoulders as if that was an appropriate punishment. 

“I’m eating lunch with a successful doctor but I, the public school teacher, am paying the bill?” He put his hand on his chest in mock outrage. 

“Oh please, I’ve got $100K in student loans, buddy. As I recall someone here went to school on an athletic scholarship.” 

“Right, because you didn’t get a total of eight different academic scholarships when you went to Princeton. Not like you paid out of pocket for that Ivy.” 

Devi scoffed and rolled her eyes. “I went to medical school! That’s like a billion more years than you went.”

“It’s adorable how you two are fighting over the bill,” Melissa appeared out of nowhere. “But just order the cake and then your food is free. It’s the second sheet on that clipboard I handed you.” 

“Great, we’ll just order a cake!” Devi said, reaching across Paxton for the clipboard. Melissa wandered off and Devi pulled the sheet up to see the order form and got to work. “Okay so apple for sure, and you liked the margarita one…”

Paxton leaned over to see the form, running his finger down to the bottom of the form to show Devi what he saw. “Uh, Vishwakumar, this is not a grocery store cake.” 

Devi looked at him, not at the form and stuck out her tongue. “Of course it’s not. It’s so much better.” 

He nodded but tapped the form again. Devi swatted his hand away but then gulped, her eyes wide.

“The cakes start at $200?”

Paxton pursed his lips together and nodded, a slight smile on his face. “You go ahead and get that, make sure you order a chocolate bacon one, too.” 

Devi laughed and shook her head. “Uh, no.” 

“So what’s the move, doc? You gonna pay for lunch now? That’s only $25.” 

But something came over her face. A slow smile, then her eyebrow went up. She bit the inside of her lip, he could see the indent on her skin, then full on, wide smile. The big kind. Oh no. That couldn't be good.   
  
“I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” she leaned her head in close to him, too close because her lips were right there and if he wanted to, if they were actually engaged or dating, he would have kissed her just because her lips were right there. “You go to the car. I’ll meet you in the car and then we run.” 

Paxton slowly threw his head back and sighed the whole way. Devi kept giving him a little nod but he shook his head. “We’re not going to dine and dash,” he said, lowering his voice. 

“Like you said! You’re a public school teacher and I’ve got $100K in student loan debt, let’s just do it!” she whispered, giddy at the thought. 

“You want to come back here, don’t you? You had a little moment with the apple one, we can’t dine and dash from a place you’re gonna come back.” 

Devi waved him off. “I’ll come back in disguise!” 

“You think they won’t recognize you with your hair up on your head, wearing your glasses? You look hot with glasses but you look very much like you.” 

“Coward,” Devi prodded, coming closer to his face, whispering, and taunting him again. “Scaredy cat.”

He could feel her breath on his face and that’s what did him in. He should not kiss his friend, Devi. Even if he loved her. Even if it seemed like she wanted him to, even if her knee was pushing into his. 

“Fuck,” he ground out. “Fine, go to the bathroom. Meet me in the truck.” 

Her smug smile was too much and then she pushed forward, surprising Paxton. She kissed his nose. “For the con,” she said, barely loud enough for him to hear, winked at him, took her purse, and left. 

Paxton took a deep breath, put his elbows on the table and massaged his temples with his hands. Devi was not his friend. Devi was the woman he loved for years and years and his shoulders slumped at the tragic reality that she was not going to break up with her boyfriend. Devi was not going to date, marry, have babies, and grow old with Paxton. 

But he was still gonna wait for her, maybe forever. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot is happening here and I think the only thing you're gonna want to know is that it's time to change the rating on the story. ;)

“There’s nowhere to park at my own house, what the fuck?” Devi asked through the phone. “The neighbors across the street have been having parties but this is ridiculous.” 

“You want me to come out and move the truck?” Paxton headed for the front door but stopped. 

“No, it’s fine. I got it, I’m coming in now. I don’t know why you need to talk to me about career day for second graders. I think I can figure out how to talk about my job for 10 minutes without you tutoring me through it.” Devi pushed the door open and the room erupted in cheers. 

“Surprise!” Everyone shouted. 

Devi covered her mouth with both hands and looked like she was going to cry. (Paxton knew it.) Nalini came over and pulled her into the house and even put a tiara on her head. 

“It’s early but that was the best way to surprise you,” Nalini said. 

Paxton watched Eleanor and Fabiola practically tackle Devi, watched Trent do a side hug because he was holding Emma. Kamala came rushing to greet her and Devi really looked like she was crying now. He started taking pictures with his phone. It was perfect. All the planning and coordinating he did, getting her mom to help with food, making sure Fab would be here in time (that one was a close call because her flight was delayed, meaning Eleanor had to rush to the airport and pick her up and get back in time for Devi’s appearance.) All worth it. 

“Is there a fucking bounce house in my backyard?” Devi shouted, her mother sighed embarrassed, and Kamala covered her son’s ears.    
  
“It’s for the kids,” Trent said. 

“It’s my birthday!” Devi replied, appalled. 

“Get in there, just don’t run any small children over,” Paxton said, coming to her for the first time. “I signed a waiver, okay?”

Devi held up her hand for a high five and Paxton obliged. “I’m a doctor, if I gotta suture on my birthday, it’s a price I’m willing to pay.” 

“Oh my god, Devi, do not whack kids!” Eleanor shouted, chasing after Devi. 

\--

“This is quite the party you put together.” Prashant leaned against the kitchen island where Paxton was getting more ice. 

“It wasn’t just me,” he said, dropping the bag of ice on the floor to break it up.

“I don’t know why you’re being so modest,” Prashant said, picking at a carrot from the veggie tray on the counter. “If I had planned this kind of event for Kamala for her thirtieth, I’d be shouting about it from the rooftops.” 

“Well, you should plan her a party like this for her fortieth, if you need help, call me,” Paxton replied, dumping the ice into a cooler and then pulling a box of capri suns from the counter and dumping them in too. “But since Devi and I are still on friendly terms, I didn’t want to make it weird. I even invited her boyfriend.”

“You invited her boyfriend? The one that Devi’s mom hates? The one that you hate?”

“How’d you hear about that?” Paxton asked, frowning. 

“Nalini told Kamala, she said she thought you two were going to fist fight in the living room.” 

Paxton shook his head. “I wasn’t gonna hit him. He was just shouting a little too loud. I don’t respect dudes who raise their voices to intimidate people.” 

“So is he coming?” Prashant asked, pulling a water bottle out of the package that Paxton was loading into the cooler. “The boyfriend?”

“I don’t know, he never responded.” Not that Paxton was upset about it. Though he worried Devi might be. He took the high road and invited the guy and then hadn’t heard anything which seemed obnoxious but maybe Jordan had a good excuse. 

“I’d like to see you join this family, I always feel outnumbered.” Prashant tipped his chin to Paxton. “Not enough men.”    
  
“Prashant,” Paxton asked, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes. “Don’t you have two sons?”

“Yes, but you know, the Vishwakumar women, they’re like ten women in one.” He laughed to himself.    
  
“I assume you mean that in a nice way,” Paxton said. 

“If I didn’t, are you gonna fight me in the living room?” Prashant teased. 

“Yeah, you and me in the bounce house, I’m gonna win that one,” Paxton said, shaking his head and smiling. “Doesn’t matter though, you should cozy up to Jordan. He’s the one joining the family.” 

“Oh dear, no thank you.”    
  
In the other room, people started to shout and Paxton and Prashant both went in that direction to see what the commotion was. 

“Oh my god, are they gonna do the TikTok dance?” Paxton asked, seeing Eleanor, Fab, and Devi right there in the middle, all of them with cups in their hands, and shouting for Trent to turn the music up. 

A Blackpink song blasted into the air as Devi, Eleanor, and Fabiola all started to sway their hips and tip their heads back and forth.There were applause and people shouting, Paxton saw Devi’s coworker, Dr. Reynolds, swaying along like he knew the dance and had definitely had several drinks. Kamala was on the side, with one of her boys, dancing and laughing. And Devi was the center of attention. She went back and forth between a serious, concentrated and wicked smile, loving the dramatic performance and her big, wide smile. Giggling every other line, her drink still in her hand as she danced to moves she made up when she was 15 years younger. 

Paxton couldn’t help but smile, his own too big smile. Eleanor and Fabiola were dancing too but he only saw Devi. She was so happy, he didn’t even have room for that feeling of defeat, that feeling of knowing he loved her but she was dating someone else. He was only thinking about Devi, she moved her shoulders and crinkled up her nose, before letting out a belly laugh, then trying to get back into the dance instead of dissolving into a fit of giggles. 

Emma ran into Eleanor’s legs, attaching herself to her mother and the crowd laughed.    
  
“Emma, do the dance, sweetie!” Trent shouted. “Keep going!” 

Paxton pulled out his phone to take some pictures, maybe catch a few seconds on video. As the song hit it’s beat, he shouted with the group along to the familiar chorus, “How you like that?” 

Just as they rolled into the big finish, Jordan bothered to show up. “What is going on? What’s my girlfriend doing? She looks ridiculous.”    
  
Paxton tried his best not to say something rude and instead greeted the guy he invited but he made a note to himself, being the good guy and taking the high road was overrated. 

“She’s having fun, doing a dance she made up in the tenth grade with her two best friends,” Paxton looked at Jordan for just a minute and tried not to roll his eyes, instead he looked back at Devi. “Oh and Emma. Emma’s helping.” 

“This is your idea of a party?” Jordan asked, crossing his arms, making himself look bigger. 

But before he could answer, Nalini grabbed his arm. “Let’s get the cake, hm?”

Whether she knew what was going on or not, it was good timing and Paxton took the excuse to go into the kitchen and light the candles on Devi’s cake. He caught Jordan hugging Devi and she looked excited to see him. Paxton had done the right thing. Devi was happy. That’s what this was about. 

“Mom! When I sent you the cake I didn’t think you’d actually order it!” Devi shouted, coming over to the dining table where Paxton was lighting candles on the two tiered cake from Crash Test Cakes. 

“I didn’t-” Nalini started but Paxton elbowed her and she cleared her throat and went on, “Let’s all sing, hm?”

“No, no, let me take a minute before we sing!” Jordan butt in. He even tapped on his plastic cup like it was a wine glass. 

Read the room, dude, it’s a barbeque, Paxton thought to himself. At least he’d gotten the really tall candles so they had some time before they burned down. 

“Most of you don’t know me, but I’m eager to meet you, since apparently everyone Devi loves is here, I’m Jordan, Devi’s boyfriend from Boston. And I’ve just accepted a job out here so you’ll be seeing a lot more of me.” 

“Fuck,” Paxton muttered. 

This was the last thing Paxton wanted to hear.    
  
He’d been resigned to the fact that Devi was not dumping her boyfriend and though he was miserable thinking about it, he kept trying to convince himself that being friends with Devi was enough. But this? Jordan moving would mean Devi wouldn’t have time to hang out with Paxton and their near constant lunches or trips to Disneyland were done. Devi probably wouldn’t even live in her mom’s house anymore. 

But caught up in his own reaction, he missed Devi’s wide eyes and slight shake of her head. She also muttered under her breath. 

“And since I’ll be here, I thought it was a good time to make this official-”    
  
“No,” Devi said, now clearly shaking her head and looking horrified. She lowered her voice, “No, let’s go up to my room and talk about this.” 

“Devi Vishwakumar,” he said, getting down on one knee.

Normally, a man going down on one knee in such a public setting would have people excited but everyone was quiet and tension hung in the air as Devi kept shaking her head. 

Nalini grabbed Paxton’s arm and squeezed, hard. “Oh no,” she whispered.    
  
He could see Fabiola’s jaw drop across the room and Eleanor hid her face in Trent’s shoulder. 

The only thing keeping Paxton feeling like he could breathe was the way Devi was clearly not going along with this. 

Still, it was painful to watch. 

“Get up,” she ground out, quietly, looking around embarrassed. “We need to talk about this.”    
  
The guy had a ring and everything. A box from Tiffany’s even. 

Finally, Jordan seemed to get it. His brows drew down and he stood up, not looking at anyone except Devi and he was mad. 

“What was I supposed to do? Your ex boyfriend plans you a giant surprise party, how was I supposed to beat that kind of a gift?”

“Shit.” Paxton hung his head. He knew that planning this party would make things weird somehow and this definitely made it weird. He blew out the candles because it didn’t seem like they’d be singing anytime soon. 

“I thought if I moved out here, I thought we could-” Jordan tried.

“You don’t make a serious life decision because you wanna win a competition!” Devi said, raising her voice but quickly schooling herself, trying to be calm, “And I’d appreciate everyone in the peanut gallery to see that I’ve grown with that statement”. 

Someone started to laugh but it morphed into a cough. Paxton didn’t see who it was but he was mostly proud that he himself didn’t make that mistake. 

Devi crossed her arms and took a step closer to the door and to Jordan. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”    
  
“Is this where you tell me you’ve been fucking your high school boyfriend the whole time you’ve been here?” 

Paxton wasn’t sure if he should defend Devi or keep his mouth shut. But one look at Devi’s face, flushed with sudden anger and he knew it was better to let her handle this. 

“Get out of my house.” Each word was quieter than the one before. She was McEnroe mad and could explode at any moment. 

“I guess not even bothering to deny it is an answer,” Jordan threw his hands out wide now, seeming to realize he was making a scene but he didn’t care. He acted like he’d take on the whole party. 

Paxton couldn’t help himself, he started to say something but Devi turned on him quickly and shook her head sharply so he shut his mouth. She turned back to Jordan. Devi could handle it.

“I should have broken it off when I moved here. I’m sorry I let you convince me to try this. I should have stood my ground. My history with Paxton is none of your business. We’re friends. But I haven’t cheated on you. I think he’d die before he took part in that kind of a scheme and I respected our relationship enough to not fuck around. But don’t think that you’re some kind of winner for demanding that explanation from me. How dare you make me defend myself in front of my friends and family at my goddamn birthday party?!”   
  
In all of that, Paxton was happy to hear her stand up to Jordan like that. He watched her use her temper and her control over it to eviscerate the man in front of her and Paxton was proud? Was it okay to be proud of her for that? Maybe he was a bad person for it but he was proud of her. 

Jordan opened his mouth to respond but Devi glared at him and he closed his mouth immediately. She was calm now, but he could see her fists clenched, it was taking a lot for her to maintain control.    
  
“Don’t take a job here. Go back to Boston. I’m done. I’m sorry you came all this way but I’m done.” 

And without another word, Jordan stormed out. 

Before anyone else could say anything, Paxton reached out to Devi. “I didn’t know he was going to do that,” he offered in what he hoped was sympathy. 

But Devi shook her head at him and frowned. Not the reaction he was looking for but not exactly surprising for what had just happened. Devi’s eyes held unshed tears and she took a breath before looking at him.    
  
“Somehow this is your fault and I’m super pissed at you, too!” 

The crowd that had been quiet for the fight now started to whisper to each other. Paxton wasn’t bothered by it.

“Okay,” he said before he walked over to the cake, as Devi turned to the crowd. She gave a half smile, tears finally falling down her face.    
  
“Thanks for the great party, everyone. I’m so glad you came.” Her voice cracked and Paxton knew what he needed to do. Devi ran for her room. Paxton pulled the entire top tier off the cake (the apple streusel layer) and gave it to a waiting Fabiola. Eleanor grabbed plastic forks and a couple of bottles of wine, and they went up to comfort Devi. 

“Who wants cake?” Paxton asked, putting on a fake smile and addressing the rest of the party guests. Thankfully, they all wanted cake and an excuse to move on from what they’d all just seen. 

\--

  
  


Paxton wiped the dining table down and caught Trent putting a sleeping Emma on the couch in the living room. Teddy sat at the table, watching youtube on Trent’s phone, and Paxton prodded him to lift his hands up off the surface so he could clean under him. 

“We finally got the boys out of the bounce house so we’re going home,” Kamala said, as Prashant walked past, carrying a boy in each arm, slung over his shoulder, to the front door.    
  
“It was a great party,” Prashant added before he walked out the door.    
  
“Nalini went up to bed, she said you knew to lock the door on your way out?” Kamala offered. 

“Yeah, gotta go unplug the bounce house and do a few more things in here and then I’ll head out. Night.”   
  
Just as Kamala left, Eleanor came down the stairs and sat on the couch next to Emma. “Look at her little baby face. Oh my god, it’s so cute. I made a fucking adorable child.”   


“You guys blew through that wine, huh?” Paxton asked, a lilt to his voice. 

“I’m not drunk, leave me alone,” Eleanor said, folding her arms across her chest like a child. 

“You’re a little drunk,” Trent added, coming in from taking out the trash. “C’mon, Teddy, let’s go put Mom in the car. I’ll come back for Emma in a sec.”    
  
“Baby, will you carry me,” Eleanor asked, her voice a high pitched whine.    
  
Trent sighed, but Paxton could see his half smile, before he leaned over to put his arm under her legs to carry her. “Fabiola’s coming down soon, right?” he asked. 

“She was right behind me. She’s coming,” Eleanor said, nestling her head under Trent’s chin. 

Sure enough, before Trent came back, Fab came down the stairs with much more grace than Eleanor had, carrying a bag of trash and a red solo cup.    
  
“Did you guys fix her?” Paxton asked as he took the trash bag from her. 

“She’ll be alright. And don’t worry, she’ll go to bed easy. She’s not anywhere near as drunk as Eleanor. She’s barely buzzed.” Fabiola offered Paxton her cup, he took it and had a drink before sticking his tongue out and working his mouth like the taste might improve somehow. “I’m surrounded by lightweights.” 

“What is that? Gasoline?” he asked Fabiola, still pushing his tongue in and out trying to taste anything else but the bitter taste stuck in his mouth. 

“Fab, let’s hit the road.” Trent came in the door and made a beeline for Emma on the couch. 

“I’m coming,” she said before looking back to Paxton. “You could probably get away with saying goodnight to her, but don’t say anything else. She might lecture you for a while.” 

Paxton shook his head. “Don’t worry, I wasn’t going to try. She needs some space and I’m exhausted so I’m going home.” 

“You’re not worried that she’s mad at you?” Fabiola asked, mildly surprised. 

“It’s Devi, she had a lot of big feelings all in a short amount of time. She’ll chill out and then she’ll want to go to Disneyland.”    
  
“You still think you two can be just friends? That’s adorable,” Trent said, standing next to Fabiola.

“Do you want him to over do it again like when she first came back? Let him think this way, it will make the whole process smoother.” Fab looked at Paxton. 

“You guys know I’m right here, right? You can see me?” Paxton asked, waving his arms in front of them. 

“Fuck off,” Trent said with a laugh. “Don’t do anything stupid, go home like you said.”    
  
“I just said I was going to do that.” Paxton rolled his eyes. 

He had faith that Devi would calm down and not hold this against him very long. It might take a day or two, but he was confident that she’d get over it and they could fall back into the comfortable friendship they spent three months building. He didn’t dare hope they might be more than friends now. He wanted that but who knew what Devi wanted. Certainly not him. 

Of course, this little conversation from Trent and Fabiola wasn’t the only one he got tonight. After Devi disappeared, his mom came rushing over to ask if they might reconnect before she took his dad home. One of the nurses that was there walked by him and muttered about him being off the market now. And even Nalini snorted when the neighbor asked if Devi would be upset about the breakup. 

But Paxton could not think about it. It wasn’t inevitable and if he started to imagine it, he’d fuck it up again. He spent years imagining what things would be like when she came home and that led to a lot of problems and misunderstandings. So he knew getting ahead of himself, imagining how this might go, it was just going to be messy. His expectations or hers, somebody would be wrong so Paxton would just let it be. He’d wait for Devi to get over being mad at him and then they’d be friends and then he’d let her lead. Let her call the shots and figure out what she wanted. If she wanted anything from him, even.    
  
There were plenty of moments when it felt like she wanted something more from him but he stopped running them through in his mind because he just didn’t know. He didn’t want to be let down, he didn’t know for sure, so keeping her at arm’s length felt like the best plan forward. 

Paxton headed out back to the bounce house to unplug it and make sure it deflated so it wouldn’t blow away overnight. He picked up a plastic fork and a fruit snack wrapper on his way through the living room and then deposited them in the trash bin outside. 

“Get in loser, we’re bouncing,” Devi surprised him, leaning on the netting inside the bounce house, a cup in her hand. Her hair was wrapped tightly on her head and she was wearing her glasses. In high school she only needed them for reading but now she needed them all the time. She usually wore contacts but clearly, she’d showered at some point. She was wearing an oversized t-shirt and nothing else. He tried to keep his eyes on her face but her legs were very tempting. 

“The waiver I signed said there wouldn’t be food or drink in the house. You want me to get charged extra?” He put his hands in his pockets to give himself something to do. 

“I haven’t spilled a drop,” she plopped onto her knees and pushed the cup through the flap, “You take this, and go ahead and chug it while you’re at it. You’re behind and I need you to catch up.” 

“I have to drive home,” he said, looking at the cup and then looking back at her, trying to figure out what was going on in her head. 

She shook the cup just barely. “Take it.” 

Paxton took the cup, but didn’t drink it. It was half full and it looked like whatever drink Fabiola had earlier. He didn’t want to experience that again. He looked back at Devi, she was up and bouncing already.   
  
“It’s my birthday, drink it and get in here!” she demanded. But nothing seemed serious when she was bouncing up and down in a castle shaped bounce house. 

“Your birthday isn’t for two weeks.” He’d graduated high school and college without this kind of peer pressure and he was very close to doing what she asked just because she was pretty and he wanted her to smile at him. 

“It’s my birthday  _ party.”  _ She pressed herself up against the netting at the front again, fingers tangled in the black net, looking at him. “It’s half a glass. You’ll be fine to drive.” 

She raised her eyebrow at him and the corner of her mouth lifted and he couldn’t take it anymore. As if he could tell her no. He tipped the cup back and tried to swallow it all without it hitting his taste buds. It didn’t work. He shivered and gagged a little.    
  
“What is even in that?” he asked before putting the cup in the trash bin and toeing his shoes off to get in the bounce house. 

“I’m not sure but we ran out of wine and Fabiola mixed that up. It’s horrendous but it gets the job done. I’m feeling very floaty.” 

“That’s because you’re in a bounce house.” He pulled himself in and used the net to steady himself to stand up. 

“Now you are too,” Devi said, jumping right by him, making it harder to stay still. “I’m still mad at you, by the way.” 

“I figured.” He jumped but just barely. The liquor and food in his stomach were not thrilled with the conditions. 

Devi seemed to be completely in her element though. She jumped and jumped, swaying to whatever music she was hearing in her head, all while unbeknownst to her he was trying to keep his mind off her legs. She was jumping. And not wearing pants. What was he supposed to do? Her skin looked warm in the dim light from the porch lamp.   
  
“Can you still do a flip?” Devi asked with a sly grin, reminding him to look at her face. 

“I don’t know,” he said, returning her smile. His stomach would revolt but the way she was looking at him made him want to try. “Back up.”    
  
She moved to the side and he jumped a couple of big jumps to get the momentum needed, ignoring his sloshing stomach. One more big jump and he pushed himself forward and sure enough, he could still do a flip, but he did not land on his feet, instead he landed on his ass and started laughing.    
  
“I should not have dared you to do that,” Devi said, giggling. “You could have broken something. Thank god you landed on your ass. That’s the only place with any fat on you.” 

She was bouncing around him now, just little jumps that come from being on an air filled trampoline. Without thinking too much about it, Paxton grabbed her calf, just under her knee, and pulled her down on top of him. She squealed on the way down and then rolled away almost immediately. But it was a bounce house, his weight made a dip that had her body inching towards him. She reached out with her leg and hit his chest, not hard, just enough to knock the little balance he had off so he was on his back now too. 

“Whatever the bounce house cost, it was worth it,” she said, before laughing again. She turned to look at him, she was close, too close apparently because she discreetly moved away a few inches. She was tipsy and not interested. That was fine. Paxton wasn’t expecting anything. He’d already told himself. Friends. They were friends. 

“Glad you like it. They’re coming tomorrow to pick it up.” 

“I should buy one.”    
  
“Just to have?” he asked, a slight smile. It was exactly the thing he could imagine Devi buying. 

“Yeah, it’s fun.” She sat up just so she could fling herself backwards with a bounce, her arms wide so she smacked his chest on the way down. She moved quickly, rolling away, then rolling back, like she couldn’t sit still. “I know this is hard to believe but I’ve had more fun since I moved back than I have in years.”    
  
“Well, you were in school for a lot of those years you were away and the way you do school isn’t exactly fun.” 

“It’s rewarding, fun and rewarding can be the same thing.” Devi corrected him. 

“Okay, sure.” Paxton didn’t agree but there was no use arguing with her. He liked teaching school, he even liked college, but he never thought being in school was rewarding for him. It just wasn’t his experience. 

“We didn’t dine and dash two weeks ago, did we?” she asked, a hazy look in her eye like she was remembering the bakery. 

“No,” he admitted. “I ordered your cake.”

“But you let me think we did?” Devi asked, turning on her side and propping her face up on her hand. 

“You were so hyped about it, so yeah, I let you think we did.” Paxton put both hands under the back of his head. “Now you don’t have to go back in disguise. You can just go back.” 

“We’re still going back in disguise. I’m gonna make you wear a ball cap.” She reached over and ruffled his hair and he shook his head to get away from her hand. “You hate ball caps.” 

“If you have hair like mine, you don’t need to hide it under a hat,” he said. 

Devi’s hand lingered on his cheek. Paxton didn’t want to move, he didn’t want her to move her hand and he held his breath, unsure of what might happen next. She searched his face for a moment before sliding her hand off, but she left it to rest on his chest and Paxton let himself breathe. 

“I’m still mad,” she wouldn’t look him in the eye though, she was looking at her hand on his chest.    
  
“Fair enough.” He looked up at the ceiling of the bounce house because he couldn’t stand to look at her not looking at him. “Sorry I invited Jordan. I thought that was the high road. I thought you’d be happy.” 

“God, I sound like such a bitch if that’s the reason I’m mad. How dare you invite my boyfriend to my birthday party?” 

“So it’s not that?” 

Devi didn’t say anything for a moment and he gave himself permission to look at her, just for a second. She was still looking at her hand on his chest, he could see her eyelashes. Sometimes she wore false ones but not tonight. She was ready for bed. He could see the light reflecting off her glasses. 

“I humiliated myself. So yeah, I am mad you invited him but it’s my fault. I fucked up by not breaking up with him three months ago.” Devi admitted, her voice quiet. Just as Paxton wanted to cover her hand on his chest, she started again, “And what kind of an awful person am I if I turn around and start dating you?” 

His immediate impulse was to tell her she wasn’t a bad person at all, but sometimes you had to let Devi talk these things out. Plus, his saying that was rooted in the fact that he wanted her. He wanted to be with her and he didn’t give a shit if it made either of them bad people. 

Devi started to pull her hand away. “Okay, so you don’t have an opinion?”

He grabbed her fingers, bringing her hand back to his chest, over his heart. “I have thoughts but I was letting you talk, sometimes it’s best to just let you do that.”

Devi let out a soft laugh, and shook her head. Paxton looked up at her. She was still leaning on her hand just above him. She bit her lip and gulped, like whatever he might say would hurt her. As if he could do that. Not on purpose anyway.   
  
“My opinion on your boyfriend hasn’t changed. Whether you fucked up or not, he seems like a real dick.” 

“My ex boyfriend,” she added, raising a brow at him. 

“I didn’t wait all this time for you to come home because I thought you were a shitty person.” He wanted to touch her, more than just her hand, but she rolled her eyes and looked away, like she might cry. It was confusing. 

“I didn’t wait for you, so see, not a great person.” She took off her glasses and wiped her eyes with her free hand. 

“Devi-” he tried but she shook her head and he stopped. She took a deep breath through her nose and closed her eyes. He didn’t know what she was thinking and it was frustrating. He squeezed her hand on his chest. “What do you need from me?”

“Nothing,” she answered, looking back and giving him a fake smile. 

“Okay.” They weren’t going to get anywhere like this. It might have irritated him 10 years ago, wishing Devi could just ask for what she wanted, just say what she needed, but he knew now that she probably didn’t even know. She wasn’t holding back, she really didn’t know. 

Paxton looked down at his hand over hers, he moved his fingers to lace with hers. She didn’t hesitate and started to run her thumb across his, slowly. She scoot closer and put a leg over his. With his free hand he touched her knee, barely, waiting to see if she moved back, but instead she pushed her knee into his hand further. She leaned her forehead against his shoulder and they stayed like that for a while, so long he thought she might have fallen asleep. The wind blew through the netting and Paxton felt goosebumps rise on his skin, but he didn’t feel cold. Devi was next to him. His skin felt hot. 

“Don’t,” she whispered. 

“Hm?” He could barely hear her. 

“Don’t stop touching me,” she lifted her head from his shoulder and he could feel her breath on his neck. He didn’t dare turn to face her because he’d be too close and he didn’t want to spook her. “That’s what I need.” 

He had been tense but comfortable lying there but he relaxed further now. She wanted to be there. She wanted him to touch her. Paxton moved his hand from her knee and slid it down just below her knee and then up, above her knee, slowly, reveling in the feel of her smooth skin. He meant to keep it chaste, but he brushed the inside of her thigh and her breath hitched. He froze.   
  
“Please,” she whimpered. 

That was enough to get him hard, right then. He lifted himself up, letting go of her hand on his chest and turning on his side. He moved to her other leg, starting at her knee, skimming the skin just below her knee and then working his way up, agonizingly slow. Devi’s eyes closed and she looked serene, the barest hint of a smile on her lips. His fingers slipped across her outer thigh, across stretch marks that were new, then in, to that spot where she had a small mole that he used to reach for under her skirt in school, just to see if he could without her smacking him, without someone seeing, then out again, slipping a finger under her plain black panties, tracing the seam from her ass all the way back to her inner thigh. Paxton felt her muscles tighten but she was quiet and said nothing. His hand moved across her waist, under the oversized shirt, sliding across her belly button and then zigzagging back and forth across her stomach until he got to the swell of her breast. That seemed like a point of no return and he certainly didn’t want to stop but he waited there, just tracing the lines. After a few laps, Devi opened her eyes and looked up at him, blinking slowly, like she was drunk but not from whatever Fab mixed up in the cup. 

Devi lifted her hand to his face, her thumb brushing against his lips, causing him to close his eyes this time, letting the sensation overtake him. She moved her hand against his cheek, then down his neck, her nails scraping gently, then she pulled him down to her lips. Devi kissed his lips barely, but moved to his chin, his cheeks, and down his neck and from that point, Paxton couldn’t really tell how much time had passed. It was painstakingly slow, and they were quiet, rediscovering the spots that they memorized years ago.    
  
Devi’s shirt hung off her shoulder and he found her scar with his lips and lingered there, trying to forget what happened to her, how he fucked up and this was his mistake on her body. 

As if she could read his mind, she reached for his chin, dragging him up to her. “You’re so dramatic about three stitches. I was never gonna bleed out.” 

He gave her a small smile. “Thank god I had those Taco Bell napkins in my car to hold over your gaping wound on the way to the ER.” 

“My mom was so mad at me,” Devi said, as Paxton rested his chin on her shoulder, his hand still moving up and down her side. She put a hand in his hair and Paxton was reminded how much he loved it when she did that. “And so mean to you!” 

“I’d rather not remember that part.” Paxton pulled himself up a little so he could kiss under her ear. As he recalled, that was a button to push. Her hand tightened in his hair, yeah, it still worked. 

As if she’d run out of patience, Devi reached for his zipper with her free hand, one of her legs coming up around him to push his pants down.    
  
“We’re not having sex in this bounce house,” Paxton said against her neck. She huffed in frustration. “I signed a waiver and you have a perfectly good bed in the house. I recall the mattress being very expensive.”    
  
Devi pouted and again, he considered just giving in, but a stray cat hissed from across the yard and that seemed to convince Devi. She pushed him off her, gently, then turned over to crawl on all fours to the flap. Paxton followed her.    
  
“You lock the front door, I’m gonna unplug this and I’ll meet you up there,” he said, shivering against the wind. But instead of meeting her upstairs, she was waiting at the bottom of the stairs and took his hand as they walked up. The rush of nerves hit him at the top of the stairs when he could see Nalini’s door at the other end of the hall. It was closed but Devi checked too, putting her finger over her lips in a sign to be quiet.    
  
There was the nostalgia of sneaking into her room like when he was 17 but now he was a grown man and Nalini was sort of his friend but he didn’t want to push his luck.    
  
As soon as Paxton pulled Devi’s door closed, she was kissing him. Not like before, when they were tender and slow, there was an urgency now and he was happy to match it. His nose hit the bottom rim of her glasses and Devi pulled them off to set them on the dresser next to them without looking. She bit his bottom lip while working his zipper and he groaned. Her hands were in his boxers before he could catch his breath. As much as he liked the idea of sex against the door, that was more for his apartment where no one else would hear. He walked her back to the bed, walking out of his pants while Devi grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head, barely moving her lips from his, just enough to get his shirt off. 

When her legs hit the edge of the bed, he put his arm around her back and lifted her awkwardly as far up the bed as he could. She giggled and he thought he must be dreaming. Arm still behind her back, he tugged her shirt over her head and then kissed along her collar bones. His hand went to her breast and Devi’s hips bucked into his eagerly. He had to close his eyes for a second to recover. She was writhing under him, pulling her panties down and he had to take another cleansing breath. It was overwhelming his senses.  _ She _ was overwhelming his senses. 

Paxton kissed along her sternum, taking a beat at each nipple, sucking it into his mouth, and feeling giddy at the way she moaned. He moved down further, nipping at her stomach and looking up at Devi as he settled between her legs. She whimpered as he lifted her leg over his shoulder, pressing his lips against her inner thigh before reaching her core. He licked tentatively at first, but quickly found the rhythm against her clit that had her hips bucking so much that he had to put his arm over her stomach to keep her down. His other hand worked two fingers in and out.    
  
“Almost,” she cried, putting her hand into his hair and tugged him back just as she clenched around his fingers. Her body shook and Paxton turned to kiss her inner thigh on the leg over his shoulder again. His thumb found that mole and slid against it. “That’s embarrassing,” she mumbled after a minute of heavy breathing.

“Why?” he said, slowly making his way up to her, kissing across skin as he went. 

“If I were ranking orgasms of my life, I think that one comes in behind my Magic Wand, and then the number three spot would probably be you again, from…” she trailed off and Paxton tried not to look too smug but he could only do so much. 

“From the wedding? I told you your boyfriends sucked.”    
  
“Not even in a fun way,” she said, laughing at her own joke. 

He rolled over, reaching for his pants and checking the pockets until realization dawned. 

“Shit,” he muttered. “My wallet must have fallen out in the bounce house.”    
  
“I think I have…” Devi dug around in the drawer in her nightstand. “Ugh, I don’t.”

“It’s fine, I’ll just go down on you again,” he said. “It was such a chore the first time so-” 

Devi’s foot caught him in the side. “Shut up.” 

He wiped his chin before leaning over and kissing her. She sighed into it, her tongue sliding against his, and using her foot on his side to pull him closer to her.    
  
“I don’t have a condom,” he said in between kisses.    
  
“You always wear one?” Devi asked, her heel still pushing into his back, leaving no space between them. 

“Yeah, of course.”    
  
She tipped her head back and he took the opportunity to suck on her pulse point. 

“Me too,” she explained. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it.” 

“I may be an adult but I’m still deeply terrified of your mother and I don’t think she’d like me very much if I knocked you up,” he said before playfully kissing along her jaw. Her heel pressed against his back again. “God, who even says that anymore? Your mom’s words just burned into my brain.” 

“I have an IUD, so if you’re clean and I’m clean, please get your dick inside me,” she huffed, exasperated. 

“You’re so romantic,” Paxton teased, but he was already pushing into her and groaned as he did. 

“Jesus,” she breathed out. Devi’s legs wrapped around his waist and he felt like it wouldn’t take more than a couple of strokes to finish. “You know I just hate giving blow jobs, I’m not romantic, I’m efficient.”

“Your dirty talk needs work.”   
  
“Fuck you,” she said with a laugh. 

“I’m trying!” he said before kissing her again. That was better. Letting her talk was no good at the moment. He picked up speed, pumping into her and felt the pull low in his belly. 

Devi nibbled at his lip, panting as he came closer, but just before he could get there, Devi pushed against his chest, rolling them over so she was on top. She ground into him, once, twice, a third time, rubbing her clit against his pubic bone as she went, sending herself over the edge. Her clenching around him was too much and he sat up, pulling her against his chest, clumsily crashing into her lips, and pushing up into her one more time before going over. 

He missed her for everything she was but as he came down, he couldn’t help but admit this was a big part of what he missed. 

Gingerly, he laid down, bringing her with him, still on top of him, with him still inside of her. She kicked her foot, moving it around and finding her comforter with her toes, then reaching behind her and pulling it up over them. Devi sighed against his chest, her muscles taut against him. He loved it. He slid his hand up and down her back, he was almost asleep when she rolled over.    
  
“I gotta pee.”    
  
“I’ll be here.” He wanted to be there forever. He never wanted to leave her bed. 

She picked up her shirt from the floor and slipped out the bedroom door. Paxton looked at the clock on her bedside table and saw it was only 11PM. It felt so much later, but he supposed it had been a busy day and time was relative when he spent the last hour in a bounce house in the backyard. 

When she came back he was on his side, Devi laid on her back, but tugged on his arm, pulling it over her stomach and wedging her leg in between the two of his. She turned her face and pressed her lips to his quickly, then moved so his lips were against her hair. It smelled like coconut oil and he kissed her head feeling more content and at peace than he had in years. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited wedding flashback woven with a combined family Thanksgiving. What could possibly go wrong? So. Many. Things.

Devi’s phone rang twice before she reached for it on her nightstand, eyes still closed. “What?”

“I hope you’re not hungover,” Dr. Reynolds said on the other end of the phone. She knew it would be him. Her phone was on vibrate unless someone from work called, then it would ring.   
  
“It’s like,” she pulled her phone away from her ear to look at the time, “It’s 9 in the morning. I’m never happy to be up at 9 in the morning.”   
  
“I was at your party yesterday,” Reynolds added. 

“So was I! And I saw you having far more to drink than me. Cut to the chase, dude.” 

“There was a ten car pile up on the 405 and three people called out. Can you come in for a couple hours to help?” He sounded like he at least felt bad asking. 

“Yeah, I’ll be there in 20.” Devi pushed her arm out, finally looking around but her arm just hit comforter. Where was Paxton? He left? He just left her? She checked her phone. No text. What the fuck?

But she didn’t have time to think about it. When she opened her door, her mom was coming out of her bedroom with a laundry basket. “You’re up early.”   
  
“I have to go to work for a few hours. I’m gonna shower,” Devi explained.

“You want me to make you something to take for breakfast?” Nalini asked, concerned. It was one of the ways their relationship worked now that Devi was home. Devi would ask her mom if she should stop by the store on the way home and pick up oat milk and Nalini would offer things like a packed lunch when she knew Devi was in a hurry. Both of them were far more considerate of the other now than they ever had been when Devi was growing up. 

“Thanks, that’d be cool.”   
  
Devi slipped into the bathroom and showered quickly, both because she was in a hurry and if she stood too long with her thoughts, she’d have to circle back around to Paxton not being in her bed this morning despite being in her bed when she went to sleep. Had she done something wrong?

Nalini handed Devi a lunch bag when she got downstairs. “Go out the backdoor, quicker to get to your car that way.” 

“Why would I-?” Devi started to say but her mother shooed her through the living room to the back. 

She closed her eyes at the sun’s brightness but recovered when she saw the bounce house being packed up by a couple of big guys. At the bottom of the stairs stood Paxton. 

“Morning Sunshine,” he said, handing her a Starbucks cup.   
  
“You’re back here?” she asked, surprised. 

“Yeah, I had to bring the guys to the backyard so they could pack up the bounce house.” 

“Are you sure nobody drank in this? It kinda reeks,” one of the burly guys asked Paxton.   
  
“Not a single person did, I promise,” Devi spoke up quickly, knowing very well that she was lying but she wasn’t the one that spilled whatever in there so the lines of truth were blurry. “I have to go to work for a couple hours,” she said, turning back to Paxton. 

“Your mom said, go stitch some people up so well they won’t scar, and I’ll see you later.” He smiled warmly and Devi’s stomach did a little flip. 

“I thought you left,” she said, lowering her voice so the bounce house guys didn’t hear.   
  
“That’s kinda your thing,” he said, raising his eyebrow at her. She frowned but he kept going. “What, did you think I waited nine years to seduce you so that i could leave you in the morning like you did to me at the wedding?”

Devi frowned further and felt her cheeks flush from guilt. “That would have been a long con.” 

Paxton leaned closer to her, his smile playful now. “I couldn’t be in your bed when your mom woke up. She likes me sort of but I doubt she likes me _that_ much.” 

Devi wrinkled up her face. “I didn’t even think about it. Right. I’m sorry.”

“Take your chai and go to work. Text me when you’re done.” He leaned in to kiss her but stopped at the last minute. “Your mom is watching us.” 

She looked over his shoulder at the door and yes, her mom was behind the sheer curtain. Devi sighed. “Okay, I’ll text you later.” 

Letting her mom in on what was happening before Devi even knew what was happening didn’t seem like a good plan. She put her hand on Paxton’s arm and squeezed to thank him for the drink and then headed to her car. 

Devi did leave his bed the morning after the wedding. She didn’t even come up with a lie about her flight being early. She bolted out of there so scared out of her mind that she couldn’t stand to even text him for the next nine years. Not her best work.  
  


\--

When Paxton opened the door to his apartment, Devi launched herself at him. He was expecting her but he wasn’t expecting her ready to jump his bones the minute she walked in, it seemed. Though, he caught on quickly. After bumping teeth, he smiled against her lips as Devi kicked the door shut behind her. She tossed her bag on the couch and was tugging his shirt out of his jeans. She liked the way he sucked in air as she scraped her nails across his stomach. 

Devi worked almost a full 12 hour shift. After they cleared the car accident patients, there was a fire at an elementary school fall festival. Nothing serious, just burns and kids with smoke inhalation and some overly zealous moms but those two events put the emergency room behind it’s regular flow by several hours and Devi couldn’t leave when they were so behind so she pulled up her hair and kept working. She finally texted Paxton on the way to her car after 8PM and he said he’d order some food and they could hang out.   
  
It was good that she’d been busy all day, she didn’t have time to think about what happened last night. She didn’t have time to dwell on that sick feeling in her stomach when he wasn’t there or that lightness she felt when he told her why he left. But on the car ride to his apartment, she thought about those things. She didn’t want to talk about where this was going or if she was a bad person for jumping right into bed with him hours after she dumped her boyfriend. Or if this was it. They’d been dancing around this like it was a final level of a video game. This was the thing they always talked about and now it could happen. Both of them in the same place. Both ready to be together. Devi didn’t _not_ want that. But it seemed absurd to decide to commit forever right this minute. Absurd. Or Terrifying.   
  
So when she got to the apartment, slamming into him, that seemed like the best way to avoid all that. With the added bonus of all the pent up frustration she’d carried around for months of being his friend when he was just out there existing, looking like that. God, he was still so hot. 

“You smell like antiseptic,” he said, running his hand up and down her bare back after they’d finished one, maybe two rounds? What counted as a round? Didn’t matter. 

“Sorry, I was at work.” Devi frowned, her chin on his chest. “What do I normally smell like?”

Paxton looked up at the ceiling. “Coconut oil, vaguely floral, and you smell like Cinnamon Toast Crunch an impressive amount for a grown woman.” 

“That is a top tier cereal. My mom buys it at Costco now.” She smiled.

“She never used to buy it for you,” Paxton said, knowing very well about teenage Devi’s complaints about the sugar cereal situation at her house.   
  
“She’s pretty chill about it these days,” Devi said before tilting her head. “Wait, coconut oil? I don’t use coconut oil. It’s cocoa butter. My shampoo has cocoa butter in it.”

“That sounds wrong.” Paxton leaned in and sniffed her hair, kissing her head before he pulled back. “That’s coconut oil.”   
  
“It’s really not.” 

“Feels like you’re fucking with me,” he said. Devi shook her head and laughed and Paxton frowned. “Your hair has always smelled like coconut oil!” 

“I love that you’re mad. The smell hasn’t changed, you just misidentified it for over a decade but you’re mad at me for breaking the news.” She grinned, the tip of her tongue coming out between her teeth because he was so cute when he was flustered and annoyed.   
  
His brow was furrowed and she noticed a wrinkle just above his nose. He leaned into her head again to smell. Devi closed her eyes and felt his arm tighten around her back, she tightened her arm around his middle and pressed her lips to his bare chest. That feeling of restlessness when she first ran into him months ago was gone. Like a sore muscle that needed to be stretched, Devi stretched and stretched and now she was comfortable. She was tired, exhausted even, but she was warm and she was safe and she was home. 

\--

Devi managed to avoid a conversation about what exactly she and Paxton were doing for two weeks. It was incredibly easy to avoid because it turned out they could just have sex. A lot of sex. All the time. 

His apartment (pretty much all over the 900 square feet of it), her new bed, his truck (just once, she practically needed a chiropractor after that contortionist act), and hey, they finally did have sex in the supply closet in the ER. 

_“This is what Fab and Eleanor said we should do when you brought me to the hospital after the coyote,” she panted as she held herself up by clinging to the frame of the metal shelf he had her pinned against._ _  
_ _  
_ _Paxton kissed her as he slipped his hand up around her ass to lift her up more, getting just the right angle to make her gasp._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Yeah, I overheard,” he spoke against the skin of her neck._

_“You did?” Devi asked, blushing. Never mind that he had said much dirtier and blush worthy things to her moments before._

_“It’s why I doubled down on the friend thing,” he barely managed to get out as she scraped the skin at the nape of his neck, making him stutter. “Bad move, I shoulda taken you to the closet right then. So much time lost when we could have been doing this.”_

_“I think we’re better at now than we were then.”_

_“We put in the hours. Practice, practice, p-” he stopped as she kissed him._   
  
But not having the conversation meant they were now hurtling towards a combined family Thanksgiving and no relationship status for the families that were definitely going to ask. Paxton mentioned this, but only just barely. He seemed uncomfortable bringing it up which meant that Devi worried he didn’t want to have the conversation so it was best to keep avoiding it. Which is how she ended up on the Hall-Yoshida front porch thinking about getting him in the garage for a quickie (did they still have that hideous futon?) in between courses instead of thinking about his mom asking when they were getting married.   
  
It wasn’t his mom. 

It was Becca. 

Betrayed by his sister. 

Devi didn’t know what to think about it. 

Becca hugged her tightly, she introduced Devi to her boyfriend Kenny, a dark haired guy with Down Syndrome. He was a photographer taking pictures of her clothes and it was love at first discussion of the poor lighting available for shoots in the back studio. 

“It’s so great to see you and Paxton back together,” she started.   
  
Devi gulped because “together” seemed both like the least formal and most formal statement anyone had considered yet and it made her stomach drop. She wanted to be together but what did everyone else think of it? Sure, Becca just said it was great but did she mean it? Was she just being polite? Did she know that Devi had dumped her boyfriend and gotten into bed with Paxton within a few hours? She couldn’t know that. Oh god, what would happen if she told her that?   
  
Becca leaned in a little, so Kenny couldn’t hear. “But I’m getting married first okay, don’t overshadow me on this one. You’re my parents’ favorite of any of mine or Paxton’s exes so poor Kenny is already behind.” 

Devi’s jaw dropped. She didn’t know what to say. Becca smiled. 

“He’s gonna propose over Christmas I can tell.” Becca looked back at Kenny and smiled wide and sincere but quickly turned back to Devi with a smug smile. “I swear to god, do not ruin this for me.”

Devi closed her mouth and cleared her throat and tried not to laugh. “Got it.”

“I’m serious,” she replied, pointing a finger at Devi. Devi nodded furiously that she understood.   
  
“But he’s gonna get you like an actual gift though right? Because an engagement ring is not a Christmas present, that’s a cop out, Becca, you make sure he gets you a good gift _and_ the engagement ring. If he doesn’t, do not say yes,” Devi said, seriously, but wanting to laugh the whole time. 

Becca scoffed. “Obviously. I’m not an amatuer, Devi.” 

They both laughed and Devi tried to forget that this was only the first time someone was going to mention her relationship today. 

\--

_December, 10 years before_

_“You’re being a brat about this, Devi. Eleanor picked Fabiola to be the maid of honor because you’re never home! This isn’t surprising!” Paxton rubbed his temple and looked at her like she was a child._

_Maybe she was having a tantrum but Eleanor was trying to have it both ways. Since Fabiola couldn’t be at the wedding until the actual wedding, she’d delegated all these tasks to Devi that Devi didn’t want to do! And now she wanted Paxton and Devi to walk down the aisle together during rehearsal but she wasn’t the maid of honor! He should be walking with Fabiola!_

_“If Fab isn’t here, you should be rehearsing by walking by yourself!” Devi explained. “It’s silly to have us walk together when we won’t walk together during the actual wedding!”_

_“Do I smell?” Paxton put his nose to his pit and shook his head. “Do I have cooties? What is it? Just take my arm and we’re gonna walk down the aisle for the rehearsal and then you don’t have to stand next to me for the rest of the week!”_

_“I think Eleanor is trying to_ Parent Trap _us and I will not be conned!”_

_“It’s her wedding! Why would she give a shit about you or I or our dating status during her wedding?!”_

_Ever since he picked her up at the airport, they’d been bickering. A lot of it being about Devi being a brat over her status in the wedding but some of it over Paxton being mad that Devi never came home._

_And Devi couldn’t just be nice to him! Things could not be normal. The last time she saw him he was throwing her TA up against a wall. To be fair, the TA in question had touched her ass one too many times and she was in the process of filing a complaint about him, but how did Paxton even hear? She specifically did not tell him about this because she knew he was overprotective to a fault. They weren’t even dating and he flew cross country to rough the guy up!_

_“I’ll pretend to be Fabiola for the rehearsal!” Trent’s mom made it all of three steps towards Paxton before Devi took his arm._

_“Mrs. Harrison, I think your husband is looking for you, I think he brought you another drink!” Devi’s fake happy voice hadn’t gotten a work out like that in a minute._

_The older woman’s face fell but she turned around and went back the other way._

_‘I’m very capable of rejecting a sloshed mom all on my own, thanks, who’s being overprotective now?”_

_Devi tightened her arm on his and looked straight ahead._

_“It’s fucked up that you’ve been rejecting her creepy advances for years so whatever. I hate it. Just walk. The music is starting.”_

_\--_

“Paxton, can you get the salad from the fridge in the garage, oh and a couple bottles of wine,” Lindsey Hall-Yoshida asked from her spot at the sink. She was getting all the food to the table while Nalini had inserted herself into the kitchen and was wiping counters as an excuse to talk less. 

“Someone doesn’t clean as they go,” Devi heard her mom mutter. 

Devi followed Paxton, desperate both for a minute alone and a minute away from the stressful situation that was having their mothers in the same room. They didn’t dislike each other, but Nalini certainly didn’t _like_ Lindsey and Lindsey, despite years of trying, was always confused as to why. 

The garage looked different, they could park a car in it now, but some of the things Paxton hung on the walls were still there, looking vaguely out of place in what was now a garage used for storing a car and an extra fridge. 

“Looks different but smells the same,” Devi said, tugging at Paxton’s arm to stop him from opening the fridge. She pressed into him, causing him to lean against the fridge door. He smiled and gave her a quick peck. 

“I’m supposed to be getting the salad, you should have stayed inside,” he said, but he tugged on her waist, pulling her closer. 

“Our mothers are exhausting and it’s only been 20 minutes! Also your sister accosted me!” 

His brow furrowed. “What did Becca say?”

“Nothing,” Devi dismissed him, instead taking his hand and putting it at the hem of her dress. It was green with a confetti pattern, the a-line of the skirt had her nervous about this little stunt but she had to have something to keep her mind off the warring moms. 

Paxton took the hint and slid his hand up her thigh and then pulled his hand back like he’d been burned. 

“Devi!” He panicked, and then lowered his voice, leaning in as if there was anyone to hear them in the garage. “You’re not wearing panties at my parents’ house for Thanksgiving dinner!?”

“That was not really the reaction I expected to get.” Devi pouted and tugged at his hand again, moving it back. 

He didn’t pull back. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath in through his nose and then with his other hand pulled her closer. She ground into him as his hand under her dress was caught in between the two of them, halfway up her thigh. 

“I’m supposed to bring the-” He lost his train of thought as she held his eyes, a self satisfied smile blooming on her face. But he slowed down his hand and Devi went back to pouting again. 

“C’mon, we don’t have all day!” Devi reached for his wrist. “You have to get the salad.”

“Don’t whine then,” Paxton commanded. That was new but Devi did not object. She nodded and waited. His hand moved just barely faster than it was. From glacial to tortoise. 

Devi’s muscles tensed at the pace and anticipation. Paxton kissed along her jaw, starting at her chin and then working his way along the side, his spare hand sliding into her hair while his other crept slowly up her thigh. 

“Relax, Devi.” It was a demand, his hot breath against her ear and his hand stopped again. 

“I can’t, you’re going too slow.” Devi stopped herself from stomping her foot in frustration. 

“I would very much like to get my hand up to check the effect of my going slow but you have to relax or I’m not moving my hand, it’s up to you.”

Devi was stubborn but also very into what was happening so instead of pushing back, like was her normal reaction, she took a slow breath, in through her mouth, parting it slowly (it was meant to entice and she caught him looking at her lips so she met the goal) and trying to relax her tense muscles. His hand started to move again, up her thigh, the pads of his fingers barely grazing her skin, she thought she might explode. 

But the door opened. 

Devi turned away from the door, covering her mouth with her hand to keep quiet and not make some sort of embarrassing noise since they’d just been caught doing whatever that was. Paxton’s hands were gone from her faster than she turned and like a gentleman, he had pivoted himself to block Devi. 

“Dad!” He was uncomfortable and awkward and Devi didn’t see but she could hear the moment Mr. Yoshida realized what he’d walked in on.   
  
“I...I just, your mom needed more butter so if you two can just grab that along with the salad and wine I’m gonna go back and help,” he said it all so fast the words blended together and Devi banged her head gently against the refrigerator door for good measure. 

The garage door shut and Paxton blew out a breath and ran a hand through his hair. 

“Well I don’t expect him to ask about our relationship status today.” Paxton spun Devi so she was facing him and kissed her forehead. “For real, we’re getting the salad.”

“And extra butter,” Devi agreed. 

\--

_“You were supposed to keep her busy so she wouldn’t make the wedding more complicated and now the two of you have done…” Trent’s hand motioned to the mess around them. “Now this?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Eleanor’s cousin, Alan, was on the floor. He was screaming in pain and he definitely had at least one broken bone. And yes. This was Paxton and Devi’s fault._

_There was an ice sculpture. A beautiful swan. Now next to Alan on the floor, in two pieces. It was for a different event at the hotel and Devi and Paxton happened to be arguing near the 200 pound, gaudy piece of artwork made of ice._

_“Maybe you just didn’t want to come home because if you don’t come home, you can pretend your dad isn’t dead? I don’t know what goes on in your head!” Paxton shouted._

_Devi laughed coldly. “Look at you, you took one psych class and now you’re my therapist! Adorable! Maybe I don’t come home because then I have to see you!”_

_“We’re trying to set up for a banquet, can the two of you please exit the hall?” The catering manager looked nervous, like they might turn the fight on her._

_“Of course,” Devi said, politely and gave a soft, fake smile._

_She turned on her heel, her too tall heel, and in typical Devi fashion, started to fall. Paxton reached for her arm, but there was no righting her and instead, he fell with her. If they had just fallen to the floor, it would have been fine but see, they were standing just above the ramp where all the food carts came up, so of course, they fell down that way. This meant that both of their bodies hit the cart at the bottom of the ramp. The cart carrying the ice sculpture. The cart went careening out the door. Screams could be heard from the lobby as the cart went and Devi cringed because there was no way this was going to end well._

_Sure enough, when they got out to the lobby to see what stopped the cart and the sculpture, there was Alan. He’d been run over by the cart and then the ice sculpture fell on top of him. He might have broken ribs but instead, he put his arms out to try and catch the swan before it fell on him, but it was too heavy._

_Devi and Paxton both looked at their feet as Trent yelled. He’d been yelling for a few minutes now. Eleanor went with Alan and his mom to the hospital._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Who is going to play the wedding march for Eleanor to walk down the aisle to? She would rather die than have someone’s phone playing it. I can’t believe you broke his arms!”_

_“It’s not like we did it on purpose, it was a terrible accident!” Devi started to defend herself but Trent rolled his eyes._

_“You broke both his arms!” he yelled at Devi. Paxton stepped in front of her and put a hand on his chest._

_“Whoa, whoa, calm down. It’s not like we each took an arm and whacked it, it was an accident, we fell, and there was the swan and the cart, and we didn’t mean for any of this to happen, so stop yelling,”_

_But Devi couldn’t just let that be. Now she was mad._

_“If you hadn’t tried to_ Parent Trap _us, we wouldn’t have been fighting, so isn’t this really your fault, Trent?” she asked, still behind Paxton._

 _“_ Parent Trap _you? I asked him to stick to you so you wouldn’t make yourself the main character at OUR wedding. And I knew you’d keep my mom away from him. Why would I try….oh my god. Everything is about you, Devi. I know. It’s endearing most of the time but Eleanor is a mess. She’s worried about Alan and now we have no one to play the wedding march.”_

_Devi felt sick. This was her fault. She was so wrapped up in her own world that she didn’t realize she was making this harder for Eleanor and Trent._

_“Take a walk, man, go call Eleanor and get an update on Alan.” Paxton was still standing between Devi and Trent and had even reached his hand back, touching her side to keep her behind him. Like he thought Trent might actually do something to her. Devi knew he wouldn’t. He was just mad. But even still, Paxton kept her there._

_“Just try not to hurt any other members of the wedding,” Trent said before he stormed off._

_“We have to fix this,” Paxton said, turning around to face Devi._

_“The hotel has a Simon and Garfunkel cover band doing the banquet, maybe we can get them to march her down to_ You Can Call Me Al _.” Devi pointed to the sign outside the banquet hall._

 _Paxton tilted his head to consider it for a moment. “Trent would probably love that.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“But Eleanor would hate it.”_

_“Yeah,” he said. Then his face lit up like he remembered something. “Devi!”_

_“Yes,” she replied, confused._

_“You play the harp!” Paxton held up his hand for high five but Devi shook her head._

_“Uh, I didn’t pack my harp because it weighs like a hundred pounds. Where are we going to find one?”_

_Paxton put his hand down but he wasn’t deterred. “We can do this. Maybe the hotel has one? I’ll call around. But if I can find it, you can play the wedding march on it, right?” He held her by her shoulders and looked at her expectantly._

_“I haven’t played regularly in three years. I don’t know if I can,” she admitted, feeling defeated._

_“It’s gotta be like riding a bike, Vishwakumar!”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“Is now a bad time to tell you I don’t know how to ride a bike?” Devi frowned and Paxton tilted his head._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Seriously?”_

_“I tried for three weeks until my dad told me not everyone’s strengths lie in athleticism.”_

_Paxton pressed his lips together like he was trying not to laugh. “That’s fair.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Devi smacked his shoulder. “You know I’m not athletic!”_

_“I know, babe, I know,” he said it so easily, like he meant to. Like when they were dating. Devi thought he must have just slipped. Surely he didn’t mean it. “I’m gonna go find you a harp, you go remember how to play it, got it?”_

_“Got it.” She did not at all feel like she had it but he was so sure she could do it, she wanted to at least try._

_\--_

_A few hours later, Devi was plucking on Alan’s violin with her phone propped up on the table in her hotel room when he knocked on her door._ _  
_ _  
_ _“I brought food and I found a harp.” He was winded and pushed past her, carrying a bag of what smelled like Taco Bell._

_“Where’d you find the harp and is it here yet?” she asked, meeting him on the bed, putting down a towel while he started unpacking the bag of tacos._

_“It’s at a middle school about half an hour away. The band teacher-”_

_“Orchestra teacher, if they have a harp, it’s not a band,” Devi corrected, taking a taco from him._

_“Sorry, the orchestra teacher is going to meet us there in an hour. We just have to make sure it’s back by Monday but since the wedding is tomorrow, I assured him we’d have it back by tomorrow night.”_

_“You’re not taking the Jeep, it won’t in the back of the Jeep.” Devi handed him a napkin and dug around in the bag for some hot sauce._

_“Nah, one of the other guys has a truck. He’s gonna come with me.” Paxton reached over and pushed her hair out of her face and behind her ear. Devi barely noticed because she was so focused on her taco. “You’ll get sour cream in your hair, slow down.”_

_“Please be careful moving it. I haven’t tuned one in three years and that would take me way too long.” She took another bite of her taco._

_“It’s precious cargo, I’ll take care of it.” He looked around the room. “How’s Alan’s violin working for a training harp?”_

_“Violin’s are dumb. Not enough strings.”_

_“Well yeah, harps have like a million more strings than that,” he said. “So this is gonna work right? You can do this?”_

_He put his taco down and looked at her carefully. Devi shrugged her shoulders._ _  
_ _  
_ _“I think.”_

_They ate in comfortable silence and then he was cleaning up the mess, putting all the trash in the bag, while Devi got up to wash her hands. She caught his arm as he was walking out the door._

_“Be careful. I really can’t watch another Youtube video about tuning, too.”_

_“If it gets to you out of tune, I’ll watch a video and tune it myself,” he said confidently._

_“That’s not gonna work.” She shook her head and let go of his arm but he came back to her, put his hands on her shoulders and looked her square in the eye._

_“Guess I better not fuck it up then.” He leaned in and kissed her, a peck like a married couple sending the other off to work._

_When he pulled back he realized what he’d done and looked sheepish. Devi looked away and then back at him._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Just like old times, and if you bring me that harp in good condition, we can do some other things just like old times, got it?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“You trading sexual favors for your harp getting here unharmed is maybe the most Devi thing I’ve heard from you all week,” Paxton said before turning to go. “I’ll call you when we’ve got it in the building and you can meet me downstairs and practice on the real thing.”_

_\--_

_Paxton was falling asleep in the chair. He was slumped on his side and kept doing that chin thing where he seemed to catch himself falling asleep woke up a little, then back to sleep._ _  
_ _  
_ _“You falling asleep is making it very hard for me to concentrate on the music,” Devi said, sitting behind the harp._ _  
_ _  
_ _The chairs and altar were all set up for the wedding. The ribbons on the chairs and the tulle hanging from the ceiling made for a tasteful scene. It looked beautiful. Tomorrow morning it would be filled with flowers._

_“I’m not asleep. I’m resting my eyes so I can really feel the music. You’re doing great,” Paxton said, his eyes still closed._

_“Just go up to bed,” Devi scolded. She looked at her watch. “The wedding is in eight hours and you need your beauty rest or your eyes get all puffy. You think Trent’s mom is gonna want you with puffy eyes?”_

_Paxton opened his eyes and glared at her before he gave her the finger._ _  
_ _  
_ _“If you’re sitting there waiting for sex-”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“I’m not,” he cut her off. “It’s 2AM and we’re in a strange hotel and I’m not leaving you alone in a random ballroom.”_

_“Nobel ass,” she muttered under her breath. “I’m gonna run through it once more and then we’re going to bed.”_

_“I’m gonna stay awake for this one, so I can give helpful feedback.”_

_“Sure you are,” Devi said, rolling her eyes and starting the wedding march for the hundredth time._

_\--_

The turkey was dry and no amount of Devi covering it in gravy was fixing the problem. She moved it around her plate with some other bits of green beans to hide what she didn’t eat. They were almost through this. Nobody said anything fight worthy and Paxton’s knee stopped shaking a solid 20 minutes before so he was clearly feeling more relaxed. 

“Michael, how’s Dr. Kim? Is he treating you well?” Nalini asked Paxton’s dad.   
  
“I like him and he thinks we can rule out MS in our hunt for a diagnosis,” Michael Yoshida answered easily. Lindsey Hall-Yoshida though was rounding on Nalini quickly. 

“Who told you?” She looked at Paxton first and he shook his head. 

“Her bullshit meter is extremely fine tuned,” Devi said, causing a wince from Paxton’s mom (she still didn’t care for swearing.) 

“I’m sorry, but no one in the history of asking for a neurologist recommendation is asking for a friend,” Nalini answered plainly. “You seem fine but you’ve been hovering over your husband all day so it had to be for him.”

Paxton’s mom floundered and Devi buried her face in Paxton’s shoulder to keep from laughing. Her mom was sharp.

“I didn’t know it was a family secret.” Nalini looked mildly apologetic. “You want a family secret from my house?”

It was like a train barreling down the tracks that Devi knew would crash but could not stop. 

“Those two spent the night together immediately after the birthday party but he tried to sneak out like a teenager the next morning.” 

Devi put her head in her hands while Paxton blushed. 

“You’re adults, do what you want, but seeing him slink out my front door, it was funny.” 

The whole table erupted in laughs, minus Devi and Paxton who were both still too embarrassed to laugh.   
  
“It wasn’t funny when I was 17,” Paxton said, like an idiot. Devi covered his mouth quickly.   
  
“What he meant was-”   
  
“Like you weren’t skipping out of this house, Devi,” Lindsey added, a wicked glint in her eye. She turned to Nalini. “Do you think she stayed at Eleanor’s on prom night? That’s what she told you I bet?"

“No, I think for prom the excuse was Fabiola’s house, but she was here? Did you know?” Nalini rested her chin on her hand and looked at Lindsey. 

“At first he tried to say that he’d be at Marcus’ but Marcus’ parents were always skiing or in Hawaii, so if it was a Marcus excuse, we just knew he’d be somewhere else. But no, I specifically remember him texting to say he’d be home after some party. He thought we were asleep but I caught sight of a lot of hot pink tulle slipping by my bedroom door. Unless he was wearing her dress, she was definitely here.”   
  
“They’re terrible liars,” Nalini said, clapping her hands together. “It’s a wonder we weren’t made young grandparents back then, as much as these two got around.” 

For the first time ever, Nalini Vishwakumar looked like she was actually enjoying her time with Lindsey Hall-Yoshida. Not great to have it be at their expense but it was a step in a good direction, Devi supposed. 

“As fun as this is I’m gonna go turn on some football.” Paxton’s dad turned to him and put his hand on Paxton’s shoulder, hoisting himself slowly out of his chair. 

“And we’re taking our pie to go, Mom,” Becca said, standing up and getting her coat. 

“Maybe I’ll take my pie to go too,” Devi muttered, but Paxton put a hand on her knee. Fine, they could stay while their mothers replayed their greatest high school hits. 

A cat brushed by Devi’s legs and she yelped. “Berkeley, cmon!” 

“Oh sweetie, Berkeley died a few years ago. That was Stanford!” 

“Mom likes naming cats after schools neither of her children went to so she can make us feel bad about ourselves,” Becca called from the front door. “See you, I’ll text when I’m home safe.” 

“That’s not true, love you, Becca, drive safe,” Lindsey replied. 

Devi leaned over to pet the cat, Stanford, and he was happy to shimmy under her hand.   
  
“You’re pretty,” she said, stroking the black, fluffy cat. 

“Be careful-” Paxton started but before he could finish, Devi yelped again. 

“Fuck!” Devi sat up to inspect her dress. The cat ripped into it and even worse, Devi pulled the material back and saw she was bleeding. Stanford scratched her right across the top of her breast. 

“He scratches,” Paxton finished, cringing as he looked at Devi’s wound. He reached for her skin but Devi stood up quickly.   
  
Moms joking about sneaking out after sex was funny but Devi didn’t want him examining her half naked chest in front of an audience. 

“I’ll go clean up,” she said, and Nalini stood up too, ready to help, but Devi waved her off. “I’m good, I got it.” 

Devi turned to walk to the bathroom but stopped just as Mr. Yoshida tipped off the couch and onto the floor, convulsing. 

“Dad!” Paxton shouted, he knocked over his chair from standing up so quickly. 

Devi rushed to the floor and immediately turned Paxton’s dad over, onto his side and held his shoulder.   
  
“Mom-”   
  
“I'm already on the phone,” Nalini said, so Devi put her focus back on Michael. 

“What’s going on?” Lindsey shrieked, coming over to the other side of Devi.   
  
“It’s a seizure. I think Dr. Kim might be premature ruling out MS if he’s having a seizure.” 

Maybe she didn’t need to insert her personal medical opinion right now but Devi never could control her mouth. 

Devi could feel Paxton hovering behind her and as the seizure subsided, she looked at her watch and then reached behind her for Paxton. She turned and looked at him.   
  
“It’s fine. It’s done now. Bad part’s over,” she said, taking his hand. 

“I’m good, I’m fine,” but he was lying. “Focus on him.” 

“Ambulance will be here in five minutes,” Nalini shouted from the dining room table. “Did you time it?”

“It was around 90 seconds,” Devi threw over her shoulder to answer her mom before gently moving him to his back. “Mr. Yoshida?”

He whimpered.   
  
“That’s a good sign, he’s coming around.” She hoped it reassured Lindsey. 

\--

_Fabiola made it to the hotel at some point during Devi’s desperate attempt to relearn how to play the harp. She even sat with Devi for a few minutes and talked, then she went up to Devi’s room. They were sharing so Devi knew it would be awkward when she slunk into the room in the morning, having spent the night with Paxton._

_“Oh my god, are you two getting back together,” Fab asked, already up and braiding her hair._

_“No, because I have to go back to New Jersey tomorrow,” Devi said, shaking her head. “No, wait, how did you even know where I was?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Fabiola gave her a knowing look. “Just scratching the itch, hm?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“That sounds so gross,” Devi said, scrunching up her face. “Don’t you have maid of honor duties or something?”_

_The next time she saw Fab, it was on Paxton’s arm as Devi played the intro to the wedding march. Fabiola gave her a thumbs up and Paxton smiled proudly at her. Devi’s fingers almost slipped at the way he looked at her. But she could not fuck this up, the wedding march was going to be flawless, she would not be blamed for ruining the wedding._

_Eleanor walked down the aisle with all the grace of Princess Kate, her dress was absolutely over the top. Beautiful beading in a deep V on front and back, with sheer fabric up to her neck and a train that was at least six feet. There were ruffles but if anyone could pull off ruffles, it was Eleanor. She looked radiant. Trent cried._

_“I still think we could have done the Simon and Garfunkel cover band,” Devi told Fabiola as they watched Trent and Eleanor perform their choreographed first dance. It too, was over the top and exactly what anyone would expect from Eleanor._

_“I’m gonna ask the DJ to play it,” Fabiola teased before she wandered off towards the DJ table._

_“We didn’t ruin the wedding,” Paxton said, coming up behind her and sliding his arm around her waist, pulling her back against him so he could kiss the spot under her ear that made her tingle._

_“We make a pretty good team,” Devi said, putting her hand over his._

_“Maybe when you come home next year,” he said and Devi’s stomach dropped. She closed her eyes and sighed._

_“I applied to med school at Yale.”_

_His grip on her waist tightened at the revelation before loosening again._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Anything closer to home?”_

 _“Johns Hopkins?” She knew that wasn’t what he meant._ _  
_ _  
_ _“You know they have medical schools in California, right?”_

_“The best ones are on the east coast,” she said, catching sight of his mom heading their direction. Not now, please not now. Devi slipped out of his arm and stood more formally next to him, he gave her a look but she tilted her head towards his mom, oh god, not both his parents coming their direction._

_“Devi!” Lindsey greeted her warmly, with a little laugh like she caught them or that she’d had a few drinks. Probably both. She hugged her tightly. “The wedding march was absolutely beautiful! Paxton said you haven’t played in years and yet you did that? You always impress me!”_

_“It was nothing.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“When are we going to see you back at home? Coming up on graduation aren’t you?”_

_Devi sighed and put on half a smile. Disappointing people wasn’t fun._

_“I was just telling Paxton, I applied to med school at Yale and Johns Hopkins, so it’s going to be a while before I come home.”_

_Lindsey’s smile dropped and Devi caught Paxton’s dad elbowing her to perk up and play it off._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Those are amazing schools and I’m sure either one would benefit from having you pass through them,” Mr. Yoshida said, politely._

_“Thank you.” Devi gave him a sincere smile._

_Devi could feel Paxton growing uncomfortable next to her. She almost reached for his hand, she started to, but stopped, remembering his parents were directly in front of them and since she’d basically just rejected him (and, by extension, them) didn’t think it was a good idea._

_“How’s your mom?” Lindsey asked._

_“Cranky as usual, but she’s fine, thank you.”_

_Paxton put his hands in his pockets and looked around. It didn’t seem fair that Devi was doing all the talking when they were his parents._

_Devi looked past Paxton’s parents and saw Eleanor now dancing with her dad. Her whole body tensed at the thought. Everyone turned to look at them dance and Devi could hear Lindsey cooing about how cute it was. Some song about fathers and daughters was playing. She didn’t know which one but they were all equally bad to Devi. Paxton put his hand on the small of her back, but she moved away from him._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Excuse me,” Devi tried to say, tears forming in her eyes._

_“Devi, would you like to dance with me? Becca’s not here so…” Paxton’s dad was so kind and so unaware of what was happening._

_Devi shook her head quickly and bolted. She should have apologized. She realized that once she was in the hall. She stopped near a water fountain and took a drink but her throat was dry as if she hadn’t had any water at all. Her skin was clammy and all she could do was close her eyes and lean against the wall._

_“If you pass out, I’m here,” she heard Paxton say._

_Devi took a deep breath in through her nose and felt herself sway a little, but Paxton’s shoulder was against hers now. He was leaning on the wall next to her, helping her stay up. It felt like she was falling, but when she opened her eyes, she knew that wasn’t real. She was upright, she was fine but keeping her eyes open took too much effort so she closed them again and reminded herself she was standing, not falling._

_It might have been two minutes or ten, Devi didn’t know, but she felt her cheeks warm and her legs didn’t feel like jelly anymore, and she managed to lean her head on Paxton’s shoulder._

_“You back?” he asked, softly, putting his phone in his pocket._

_“Oh my god, I have to apologize to your dad,” Devi said, pushing herself off the wall. He did the same but grabbed her wrist._ _  
_ _  
_ _“I already did, he was just worried about you. They both were.”_

_“I’m sorry,” Devi said, watching his hand on her wrist. He was moving his thumb up and down around her the inside of her wrist and she hated that it was the most comfortable she’d felt with another person in years. Just from his stupid thumb on her wrist. “I’m sorry I can’t come home yet.”_

_\--_

“We can only take one in the ambulance,” the paramedic said, stopping Paxton from climbing in after his mom.   
  
Devi reached for his hand. 

“I’ll drive you, let’s go, we’ll be right behind them,” she explained.   
  
“I’ll be right behind you, Mom,” Paxton repeated what she’d said to his mom, not that she noticed. She was holding his father’s hand, completely focused on him. Paxton turned back to Devi. “I can drive, I’m fine.”   
  
“I know, but you should call Becca on the way. I’ll drive.” 

Devi sat with Paxton in the waiting room of the ER. Not the place she usually sat. The chairs were stiff and there was a crying baby two seats over that Devi wished she could help. 

“You barely got the day off and then you end up back here,” Paxton said, squeezing her hand. “Sorry about that.” 

“Nowhere else I’d rather be,” she said. 

Paxton perked up seeing an ambulance pull up to the bay, he watched intently as the paramedics unloaded the gurney and pushed it back past the doors.   
  
“How did you get over your fear of ambulances when you work here?” He wasn’t looking at her. His eyes were still on the double doors where the huddle of paramedics and nurses went.

“I wasn’t scared of ambulances. It was a trauma trigger,” she explained. “And really I only had to see a few people coming out of ambulances alive before I got over it. My dad was dead before they put him in the truck.”   
  
“I forgot.” Paxton laced his fingers with hers and squeezed gently. “One day they’re gonna put my dad in there and he’ll be dead, too.”   
  
“One day they’ll put us all in one like that,” Devi corrected. “Doesn’t do any good to fixate on specific people.” 

“Right, because whatever is going on inside my brain at the moment is normal and chill and fine and I can definitely just not fixate.” He gave her a look.   
  
“I’m gonna ask for some therapist recs around here. Hopefully someone in hospice that will see your mom, too.” 

“You’re problem solving again.” 

“And I’m not gonna back off this one. You’ll feel better prepared.”

There was a time once when Devi was embarrassed about all the time she spent in therapy, especially since she could never manage to get an SSRI or something real fun like Xanax. But Devi was in and out of therapy for years because therapy helped her and she wouldn’t be ashamed of it. And she certainly wouldn’t allow someone she loved go through the pain of losing a parent without some therapeutic support.   
  
Another ambulance pulled up but before she could ask him if he wanted to sit in the breakroom with her for some quiet, a nurse came running up to her. 

“Dr. Vishwakumar, the computer updated.”   
  
“Thanks,” Devi said, standing up, pulling Paxton by their intertwined hands. 

“What’s going on?”

Devi guided him through a door and then stopped at a computer station just beyond the door. She let go of his hand to login on the computer.   
  
“This has got to be a violation of privacy,” Paxton said, seeming to realize what she was doing. 

“File a complaint,” Devi replied dryly, clicking through a few menus to get to where she needed to be. “Everything looks good. They’re gonna keep him overnight but just for observation. We can head up to the fourth floor where they’re taking him.” 

Paxton sighed with relief and leaned over and kissed the side of her head.

On the fourth floor, they walked past the nurses station to the room where Dr. Kim was speaking to Lindsey. She saw them and gestured for them to come in. 

“Family only,” a tech said at the door and Devi nodded. 

“No, she can come,” Paxton said, reaching for her hand but she shooed him away.   
  
“There’s a nice chair out here, I’ll be right here when you’re done with the doctor.” 

An intern from last month’s rotations walked by and Devi waved.   
  
“Dr. V, there’s blood on your dress,” the intern said, concerned.

Devi looked down and remembered the cat. That felt like hours ago. 

“I’m fine, just a cat scratch. Trust me, I’m far more upset about the dress being ripped than the blood.” 

_\--_

_“Why was Trent’s mom even in the gaggle to catch the bouquet?” Eleanor asked Devi, sitting next to her, slipping her feet out of her heels, and propping her feet up on a chair._

_“That’s your mother in law. You’re stuck with her, you figure it out,” Devi said, taking a sip of her champagne. “I thought you were leaving?”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“I wanted to say goodbye, I haven’t seen you all week except when I was mad and that didn’t seem fair to you.”_

_“Are you kidding? Do not apologize to me.” Devi shook her head. “I almost ruined your wedding! Because I was making everything about me, which is just...classic me! I’m so sorry.”_

_Eleanor covered her mouth and Devi could see tears forming._

_“I’ve just been so tense thinking everyone here thinks I’m making a big mistake because we’re so young and god, my mom was a flake, I got called for an audition but it’s next week and Trent told me to just postpone the honeymoon but I felt so stupid doing it so I passed and maybe that was the wrong move, and then you and Paxton broke Alan’s arms and it was just too much!”_

_“Don’t cry,” Devi said, handing Eleanor a napkin. “You’ll ruin your makeup!”_

_“Oh who cares,” Eleanor wrapped her arms around Devi’s neck. “All the pictures are done. I’m gonna go upstairs and change and wash my face in a minute.”_

_“I’m sorry we broke Alan’s arms,” Devi said, crying herself. “I’m sorry you were so stressed. Of course you and Trent are going to be happy forever. Like a billion years. And you’re gonna be a successful actress and Trent’s gonna...fuck, what does Trent want to do?”_

_Eleanor snorted. “I have no idea, but I love that idiot.”_

_“You’re gonna be fine. Go have a good honeymoon,” Devi said, pulling back and swiping at her face._

_“Okay. You go bang Paxton one more time before you go back to school.” Eleanor was determined._

_“Oh my god, does everyone just know?” Devi asked, throwing her hands up._ _  
_ _  
_ _“You two are very stupid and obvious so yeah.”_

_\--_

_“This is a very nice dress,” Paxton said, as he unzipped the back of it. He kissed the back of her neck and across her shoulders, making it hard for Devi to form any kind of response._

_“Bridesmaids dresses never are,” she managed, feeling each press of his lips light her skin on fire. ”But I think I pulled this one off.”_

_She stepped out of the dress and turned back to him, tugging his tie off and starting at the buttons of his shirt._ _  
_ _  
_ _“I’m out of practice,” she said, feeling like she was going too slow working the buttons. “Unlike you, I’m sure, always helping someone out of their dress.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _She smiled but the thought of him sleeping with someone else tasted bad in her mouth._

_“Nobody I like helping out of their clothes more than you,” he said smoothly._

_He didn’t deny it and she pushed that swirling feeling away. Paxton leaned in and kissed her, his tongue sliding against hers and she really couldn’t get the buttons now._

_She huffed and Paxton, sensing her frustration, picked her up around her waist and tossed her on the bed. She yelped._ _  
_ _  
_ _“I’ll get the buttons, you get the condom.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _Devi rolled onto all fours, making her way to the bag on the hotel end table. She could have just reached for it but she wanted him to see her ass in her black lacy thong._

_“Fuck,” she heard him breathe out. Sounded like he appreciated her ass._

_At school, Devi was a dedicated student. College parties were loud and the only time she ever went to them was to get laid. Devi did not have time for a boyfriend in college. If she did, she’d have just kept Paxton. Long distance or not, there was no point in finding somebody new. She’d perfected the art of the one night stand and she was happy with it. Between an occasional one off and her vibrator, her needs were met. But she’d forgotten the way he lit her skin on fire and the way he knew exactly what to do with her body to make it sing. You didn’t get that from a one night stand. Most college guys just wanted their dicks sucked and that was not Devi’s thing._

_Paxton crawled up her body, kissing a spot here or there, he touched the mole on the inside of her thigh and slipped his fingers into the band of her thong to pull it off._

_“You played the wedding march today on the harp without having played in years.” He kissed along her rib cage and Devi clenched._ _  
_ _  
_ _“Yes, I did. After you found a whole ass harp for me to play.” She put hands in his hair and pushed him down. “I think we both need a reward for that. Some validation. Good job, team.”_

_Her toes curled when she felt his breath against her core. The guys at Princeton didn’t do this at all and Devi missed it._

_One night stands did the trick. But Paxton did it better._

_\--_

_“Did you know Eleanor is worried that everyone thinks they’re making a mistake,” Devi asked as Paxton wrapped his arm around her. He was almost asleep at this point but Devi liked bugging him like this. Pestering him until he had to wake up and talk to her._

_“They talked about it for over a month before they decided they would actually get engaged,” each word spoke against the skin of the back of her neck tickled. He needed to shave._

_“I didn’t know,” Devi admitted, feeling guilty. “Shout out to you not bringing up that thing she said in high school, about high school romance not lasting, in your best man’s speech.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“She would have killed me, and then Trent would have brought me back to life and killed me again.” Paxton sighed and his stomach growled. “What are the chances room service is still going?”_

 _“I have no idea.” She rolled over and kissed his nose. He smiled. “When I come home, we’ll get back together.”_ _  
_ _  
_ _“UCLA has a very good medical school.”_ _  
_   
“I didn’t apply to UCLA.” 

_“You could.” Paxton put his arm over her, pulling her closer. “Where’s the room service menu?”_

_“You want to get back together now, but will you want to when I’m done with med school? You’ll probably be married and have a kid by the time I finish.”_

_“What I want is a sandwich. And to go down on your one more time. And for you to come home so I can eat sandwiches with you and then eat you.”_

_“You’re a hopeless romantic,” Devi deadpanned._

_“I miss you.” He reached over her to the drawer of the nightstand and pulled the leather bound room service menu out._

_“Keep missing me then. Until I come home.” Devi wondered if this would cause a fight._

_“Okay,” Paxton said, but he was focused on the menu. “I’ll wait for you to come home.”_


End file.
